Calamity & Kismet
by moondancer1179
Summary: Calamity strikes in Volterra. Guilt consumes Bella. Feral and desperate, newborn Bella runs away from everything she's ever known. Will she be found? And by who? What about revenge?
1. Chapter 1

_(Many thanks to my wonderful betas, ElleCC and MojoPen.)_

_I do not own the characters, I just like to play with them._

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Carlisle braced himself as the plane descended into Florence. He was not concerned about the plane's landing; he was preparing himself for emotional devastation. The call from Volterra had come while he was alone, without any prying ears to eavesdrop. He left his family behind without a word, for to bring them into this would seal their fates. His sons would not have had the control to restrain themselves, and he could not let the rest of his family be destroyed. Evading Jasper was most important. Even without Alice's visions to tell him so, he knew if Jasper ended up in front of the Volturi, all would be lost. He had to protect his remaining family. Of course he had laid plans for their escape should the worst happen, and if he was unable to make contact in the next forty-eight hours, his family would be notified and things would be set in motion to give them the best chance of survival. He had no doubts that Jasper, at least, would follow him and seek retribution, but he had faith that Rose and Esme would be able to restrain Emmett. He could not imagine what waited for him in that ancient fortress, and yet his mind obsessed over the possibilities. Carlisle had no idea if he would be welcomed by friends or destroyed by enemies. Whatever happened to him, his family must live on, and he was prepared to bargain for their lives.

The stone walls of the familiar city loomed overhead as the car pulled up to the grand entrance of their lair. The residents of Volterra had no idea of the horrors that lurked behind the stunning facade. Carlisle's nose burned from the stench of centuries' worth of death that saturated the area. He had once envisioned more of his kind following his path, hoping that by proving there was an alternative, more would stray from the mindless killing of innocent humans. Such grand delusions still lurked in the corner of his mind, but he knew that to harbor any hope of change was futile. As he passed through the doors, Carlisle remembered vividly the lengths to which his supposed brothers tried to tempt him to stray from his diet. All those lives lost because of him. While he may not have ever drunk from a human, he still felt the guilt of their blood on his hands centuries later.

Then he was there, in that stale, stone room. Three ghastly princes sat on their thrones, surrounded by their guard. He scanned the room, searching for any clues, quickly assessing escape routes as well. While he may have never lived a violent life, he was still a warrior, and he had a family to protect and return to. Aro and Caius had grown comfortable and arrogant through the centuries as they reigned, twisting the law created to protect and instead using it for control. Carlisle was aware that his family's increasing size and talents had grown to be a matter of concern for the two. Aro wished to collect them like prizes, while Caius merely wanted to destroy. Marcus, as apathetic as ever, could not care less and had grown bored with his brothers' antics over the past millennia. Aro had only to take Carlisle's hand to know he had no desire to challenge the Volturi. He only wished to live in peace with his family.

The other vampires in the room gaped at him as his footsteps echoed off the walls. The legend of the animal drinker, _Stregoni benefici_, stood in front of them, and he could sense their morbid curiosity...and their disdain. As if he was somehow less than, weaker than they, because he denied his nature and refused to murder.

Aro greeted him with a grim smile. "Carlisle, old friend. It has been too long."

"It has, Aro," he replied. "Caius. Marcus." Carlisle dipped his head in acknowledgment.

"And how is your family?" Aro pressed.

"They are well, though two of them recently arrived in Volterra. I had hoped to find them here?" He was careful not to make accusations, as he was unsure of Aro's intentions.

"Ah yes, Carlisle, always getting straight to the heart of the matter." Aro advanced toward him. "But don't you mean three?"

Carlisle flinched at the thought of the fragile girl in their clutches. "I was not aware that the girl had come with them." The message from Alice had alluded to that fact, but he had not been sure. Why Bella would take off after Edward, after what he had done to her, should not have been a surprise. He knew the depth of their love for one another. The girl was selfless and would willingly trade her own life for the lives of those she loved. Had she not proved this in Phoenix? And now Volterra. Had she saved him?

"Yes, indeed. Young Alice and Edward both fought valiantly to protect her, but I must confess that I am disappointed, Carlisle. You knew of your child's obsession with the human girl, and yet, left her behind with the knowledge of our secrets." The ancient vampire sucked his teeth in dissatisfaction.

"Your coven has become too comfortable, Carlisle." Caius rippled with righteous indignation. "You are endangering our kind by continuing with this ridiculous human charade. The law claims them all, Aro. They all knew about it." He had never pretended to have patience for Carlisle's way of life and this was his opportunity to take out what he considered a threat.

"Now, Caius, Carlisle has always conducted his affairs with the utmost discretion. His own family did not willingly tell the girl our secrets. She figured it out on her own, with a little help from a local legend." Aro cocked an eyebrow in amusement. The werewolves intrigued him. He had been surprised to hear of the treaty the Cullens made with the tribe, though Edward's thoughts had showed no indication there were currently any wolves in the area. Aro would have liked to travel to the area in person to study them. Perhaps another time.

"She never would have had cause to figure it out if they had not been putting themselves in such close contact with humans. What happens next time? Will you excuse their disregard for our laws again?" Caius seethed.

"I am sure there will not be a next time. Will there, Carlisle?" Aro fixed his gaze on the unnaturally calm vampire. He realized that without the coven's two most gifted vampires, there was no longer a reason to view them as a threat. Caius should have been pleased, but Aro knew he'd never be satisfied until they were all destroyed. The animal drinkers were simply an aberration, in his opinion.

"Of course not. We did not know the girl would figure it out, but she has never spoken a word to anyone about it. She hoped to join our family eventually, much like the humans you keep here." Carlisle was growing weary of dancing around the issue. Aro enjoyed playing his games, and he would have to be a willing participant in order to remain in his good graces.

"And I trust you. Your judgment has always been well respected. Bella is quite fascinating. _Il suo__ cantante! _Edward put your control to shame, Carlisle! Had I not smelled her through his memories, I would not have believed the call of anyone's blood could have been so strong. Not only to have resisted the call of her blood, but to have sucked another vampire's venom from her blood. How did he manage to stop after tasting such sweet ambrosia?" He continued to muse as he paced the floor in front of the triad of thrones, gesticulating theatrically. "The girl is remarkable for a human. In addition to being the one exception to Edward's gift, it seems that she is also immune to many of our gifts. Jane was quite frustrated when she could not control the girl. And I..."―he paused dramatically before turning on his heel to face Carlisle―"I have never met a vampire or human that was not subject to my own talent. For her gift to be so strong as a human...can you imagine what she would be like as one of us? Yet your family refused to turn her." His excitement and disbelief at the situation were evident, but a darker intent lurked deeper. Aro wanted Bella.

Carlisle cleared his throat, well aware of his role in breaking the most sacred of their laws. "We felt it was up to Edward since she was his mate. He forbade anyone else from changing her. I would have willingly done this, and only refrained because we believed he would eventually change her himself."

"So you are willing to change the girl?"

Relief and hope swept through Carlisle as Aro implied that Bella was still alive. "Yes."

Aro nodded and held up his hand as Caius began to object. "Felix!" he called out. Carlisle heard the unmistakable rhythm of Bella's heartbeat nearing the doors on the left. The shuffling of her footsteps was out of place in this fortress of vampires. The doors exploded open and the sound echoed off the stone walls. Bella, so small and fragile, appeared in front of the towering vampire. Her hair hung limply, sticking to her face and neck. Black and purple bruises blossomed on her pale arms as she shivered. He quickly assessed her vitals and found her to be in better shape than he expected. She stared at the floor, uncaring as to what her fate may be and he was unable to see her face. Though Bella's demeanor made him fear the worst, Carlisle continued to hold on to a thin thread of hope that his children were still alive. He could only guess as to why they spared her life, but knew it would come with a price. As soon as Felix let go of her arms, she collapsed to the ground and Carlisle could barely stop himself from going to her. He refused to show any weakness in front of these monsters.

"A few members of my guard were a little too overzealous in performing their duties." Aro's eyes flicked over to Felix, who cast his eyes downward, but not before a gleeful smile made its appearance. "Such a waste." Aro shook his head disapprovingly as he clucked his tongue. "I had given explicit instructions for Edward to be brought back here alive, much to his own dismay. I must say, Carlisle, I've never had such a request from a vampire before. Are you sure this animal diet is healthy?" He waved his hand dismissively before continuing. "Edward and Alice put up quite the fight to protect this human. Unfortunately, my guardsmen felt they had no choice but to destroy them in order to protect our life here in Volterra. You have my deepest condolences. I know the boy was your first companion and they were both so gifted...what a shame."

Carlisle's fists clenched and his teeth ground together at Aro's admission. He willed his knees not to give out in his sorrow. The realization crashed through every fiber of his being, his still heart ripping and shredding at the knowledge that his two children had been destroyed, and mostly for sport. He struggled to regain his composure and focus on getting Bella out of here alive.

Aro crossed over to Bella and rested his hand on her head, obviously still frustrated her mind was impervious to him. He glanced over his shoulder at the minute vampire who glared murderously at Bella's crumpled form. "Thankfully, Jane arrived before they could harm the girl and knew she would be of interest to me. Considering your loss, I feel it is only right to release Bella to you. On one condition. You must change her. She will be your responsibility."

Carlisle waited for Aro to continue and when he did not, he looked at the vampire questioningly. Aro let out a papery laugh at Carlisle's confusion.

"I assure you that is all. It was a misunderstanding. We inadvertently destroyed two very talented members of your coven. In restitution, we offer you this human, who promises to be quite gifted as one of us. I know your family already harbors strong ties to the girl, and I anticipate that her addition to your coven would be welcome."

"Of course, Aro. Thank you for your consideration. We will take Bella into our care. She will be changed. You have my word." The words spilled from Carlisle's lips automatically. He hated how easily Aro trivialized his losses. It was all he could do to contain his rage, so he kept his eyes focused on Bella. He had to control himself for her. Edward and Alice died to protect her, and he would not let their deaths be in vain.

"You must know I would never have destroyed the boy willingly. Even though he tried to force my hand, the girl stopped him from exposing himself. I will deal with my own for this transgression, though I know it will never assuage your loss. Take the girl and go back to your family. We will see each other again soon. I would so like to meet the rest of your family, and of course I cannot wait to see how our dear Bella takes to immortality. Be well."

"Carlisle, I suggest you take care of the matter quickly. Should we meet again and the girl is still human, we may reconsider," Caius said.

Aro dismissed his old friend, and took his leave, along with his brothers, their black capes billowing behind them as they departed. Carlisle did not miss the scowl of discontent on Caius' face. The rest of the vampires slowly trickled out of the room, leaving him alone with Bella. He strode quickly across the stone floor and took her into his arms. She was too light, had lost too much weight. Bella's eyes widened slightly in recognition before she let her body relax into his arms. Her eyes were red and swollen. Dark purplish bruises marred the skin under them. She was well enough to make it to Florence, where he would get them a room and charter a private plane. He would have to call Esme and gather the family. They would have to disappear for a while. They would grieve when everyone was together and safe.

The fresher air was welcome as Carlisle burst through the doors and headed towards the car. Blessedly, Bella was sleeping, her body finally succumbing to the extreme stress she'd been under now that she knew she was safe. As soon as they were settled in the vehicle, he turned on the heat in order to keep Bella warm. He'd come unprepared and had no supplies, clothes, or blankets for her. Once at the hotel, he would have the concierge take care of it. He kept his thoughts controlled and methodical, refusing to think about the family's loss. His objective was to get them to a safe house. There would be time to think about all of this and grieve once he'd accomplished his goal. Carlisle continued to monitor Bella's vitals; it was a welcome distraction as they sped through the Italian countryside, the view blurring outside the windows. He counted Bella's heartbeats, each one bringing her closer to her death. If Bella had to be changed, he was thankful Aro allowed his family to be the ones to do it. He shuddered to think of her life if the Volturi insisted on keeping her for themselves. Carlisle never relished the idea of ending a life, and despite the happiness she'd brought Edward and the family, he wished Bella had managed to avoid his world.

It wasn't long before they pulled up in front of the hotel. He roused Bella from her sleep and explained what was happening.

"I need you to hold it together until we get to the room, Bella. Just let me do all the talking."

She nodded absently. He exited the car and quickly made his way around to her side, where he helped her stand. Carlisle dressed her in his jacket, pulling the hood over her matted hair, and wiped a smudge of dirt from her cheek. That was the best he could do and he hoped the hotel staff would not ask too many questions. Bella could barely stand, so he held her tightly to his side as they approached the front desk. He deftly pulled out a shiny black credit card along with his passport and slid them to the clerk.

"Your best suite, please. Two nights," Carlisle requested in flawless Italian.

He noticed the woman looking over Bella with concern and leaned forward to explain the situation to her. Bella would say he _dazzled_ her.

"We've had a death in the family and the loss has taken its toll on my niece. She will be all right with a good night's rest and time."

"Of course, Signore Benefici. Please let us know if there is anything you require." The receptionist nodded sympathetically and finished going over the details.

Carlisle smiled wryly at the alias as he took the keys and led Bella down the hall toward their suite. The name itself was a legend based on his own exploits centuries ago, during his time in Italy, and it seemed fitting, given the circumstances. He had decided that if Bella was involved, it was best to use the emergency documents he kept on hand. Should anything happen to the girl, her father would stop at nothing to uncover the truth. He could not risk Charlie discovering anything untoward about the Cullens. The Benefici name had never been used in conjunction with their family. It was untraceable. The rest of the family's documents were sitting in a safety deposit box, and he would pick them up once they returned to the states. He was glad he'd had the foresight to include an identity for Bella after the James debacle, and they were still in Jenks' possession. He would have hers overnighted to him.

Once in their suite, he left Bella on the bed and immediately called the concierge, requesting clothes, toiletries, and food. Looking back and forth between his phone and the girl on the bed, he decided to make sure Bella was comfortable before making any additional phone calls.

"Bella, are you hurt anywhere?" She shook her head slightly. He carefully peeled his jacket off her and examined the contusions on her arms. Purple handprints marred her ivory flesh, but there was no deeper trauma, no fractured bones. He gingerly ran his fingers over her scalp and found a knot, but it did not appear to be serious. His fingers ghosted over the rest of her body and found nothing concerning. With his acute senses, he could tell there was no internal bleeding. Bella was bruised, dehydrated, and dirty, but he was satisfied that she had no serious injuries. She needed a bath, and he was hesitant to give her one, but there was no one else here to assist her, and he doubted she could manage on her own right now.

He excused himself to the bathroom and began to fill the tub, making sure the water was a comfortable temperature for her. Returning to the bedroom, he found that Bella had not moved. He lowered himself to a crouch in front of her until he could look her in the eye. The emptiness of her brown eyes startled him. It was as if she was looking right through him, seeing nothing. Shock and detachment were expected after everything she had witnessed, but it still unnerved him. Her arms were wrapped around her torso as if she were trying to hold herself together. He wondered when the torrent of emotions would break through the dam, or had she already cried out all of her tears?

"Bella, you need to take a bath. Can you make it to the bathroom on your own?"

Carlisle watched as she stood on shaky legs and when she swayed, he wrapped an arm around her waist and helped her along. He settled her on the closed toilet and turned off the water, the tub now partially filled with steaming water.

"Do you need help undressing? I'm a doctor. I see bodies every day," he reminded her. She nodded as her trembling fingers reached for the hem of her shirt. Together they removed her clothing and he gently laid her in the tub, trying to ignore the bruises that had been covered by the garments. More handprints on her bottom and thighs concerned him, but the finger-shaped bruises surrounding her breasts enraged him. His extra senses told him she had not been violated, but he could not be sure of the extent of her molestation.

"Bella, who touched you?"

She flinched and shook her head, unwilling to discuss it further.

Sighing, he retrieved the hotel soap and coarse washcloth. Even five-star hotels skimped on quality, it seemed. "I'm going to wash you now," he told her as he lathered up the washcloth and gently stroked the dirt and grime from her skin. Tearing the plastic off one of the plastic cups on the counter, he rinsed her hair. The water was murky, so he drained and refilled the tub with clean water. After washing her hair, he helped her out of the tub and bundled her up in one of the complimentary robes provided by the hotel. It drowned her tiny frame, but would keep her warm.

Once he had Bella settled on the bed, he fetched a glass of water and made her drink half of it. He couldn't help but feel sorry for the girl as her hands shook so badly that the water sloshed over the sides of the cup. A knock at the door signaled the arrival of room service, and after tipping the boy generously, he brought the food to the bedroom for Bella. Satisfied that he'd done all he could at the moment, and that she was fairly comfortable, he excused himself and closed the door to the bedroom.

Now alone in the sitting room of the suite, he held the shiny, silver phone in his palm. He called Jenks first, calling off the plan he left in place, and informing him of what he needed. Then he made arrangements for a private plane to take them back to Ithaca tomorrow.

Finally, he dialed Esme's cell phone.

"Esme, I can't explain right now, but I need everyone to gather at the house in Ithaca tomorrow...Pick up clothes and food for Bella...You just have to trust me, Esme. I need everyone there before I can explain anything...I know...I love you."

Esme was hysterical. Carlisle lay his head in his hands. He hated lying to his wife, but he couldn't risk any of the family taking off until he could be there to stop them. They had to get through all of this together.

The concierge knocked on the door moments later, and Carlisle rushed to open it. He handed Carlisle the items he had requested, and Carlisle thanked the man with a generous tip. Carlisle gathered up the clothes and toiletries for Bella and made his way to the bedroom. He knocked, but didn't expect an answer. When there was no response, he entered the room to find her curled up on the bed. She was not sleeping and had not touched the food.

"Bella, there are some clothes for you here, as well as a toothbrush, hairbrush, and a few other things you might need. I really need for you to eat something though." Carlisle helped her sit up and brought the tray to the bed. He held the fresh fruit to her lips and she mechanically took a bite and choked it down. After a little coaxing, he was able to get her to feed herself enough for the time being. He would try again later.

"Do you need help getting dressed?" he asked. Bella unwrapped her arms from her legs and tried to undo the knot in the robe's belt to no avail. He gingerly untied it for her and moved away from the bed, turning his back in order to give her some privacy. She dressed slowly, the rustle of the fabric against skin giving him some idea of her progress. Carlisle turned around once she settled on the bed, dressed comfortably in soft cotton. He grasped the brush and moved behind her to help work the tangles out of her hair. Neither one spoke, both preferring to ignore the obvious and hide their grief behind carefully constructed walls. If Bella understood her predicament, she did not acknowledge it. He was loathe to push her, afraid that once she shattered, there would be no way to get her to their destination without drawing suspicion, and he had no way to sedate her at the moment.

Carlisle left her alone then, and as the sun set, he continued to make arrangements for the next day. Each time he looked in on Bella, he found her in the same position, staring vacantly at the wall. He managed to get her to eat once more, and eventually she fell asleep. It wasn't much later that he heard a low keening sound coming from the bedroom. He flew into the room to find the girl drenched in sweat and writhing in the sheets. The sounds of anguish that came from her were almost inhuman.

"_No. Don't do this!"_

"_Edward! Alice!"_

"_Kill me, too!"_

Her chest heaved as her small body was racked with sobs and screams. She continued to beg for some unseen figure to end her life. Carlisle ran to her side and attempted to soothe her, but she was asleep and lost in her nightmare. He pressed his cold hands to her face and smoothed back the long tendrils of hair that were plastered to her face and neck. She began to respond to his touch and unconsciously moved closer to him. Carlisle finally wrapped his arms around her, and with one last whimper, she fell back into a more restful slumber. The nightmares resurfaced an hour later, but she calmed down quickly when he pulled her closer and crooned comforting words to her. He wished he had more to offer her. While she slept, he struggled to keep his mind occupied. He focused on verses from the Bible, and sought comfort from the familiar words, in an effort to avoid thinking about those he had lost.


	2. Chapter 2

_(Many thanks to my betas, Ninmesarra & MrsDazzled.)_

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Bella cowered in the back of the Mercedes as Carlisle pulled up to the house. The remaining family members were waiting inside as he asked, even though they had heard the car. He knew that now their ears would be straining, waiting to hear the sounds of four sets of footsteps, noses twitching, hoping to smell the four distinct scents of those they were missing. He sat in the car with Bella, apprehensive of what the next few moments would entail, and unsure if she was really aware of what was going on. She had not spoken since they left Volterra. She had done nothing else of her own volition, either.

Taking an unnecessary breath, Carlisle finally exited the vehicle. He wrapped Bella in a blanket and carried her to the front of the house. The door flew open, and Esme stood on the threshold, her eyes wide with panic as she searched behind her mate for her two missing children. Carlisle walked past her, and put Bella down on the couch in the living room. Though he didn't immediately acknowledge them, he felt the three other pairs of golden eyes on him. Jasper stood in the corner, arms crossed and jaw clenched. Rosalie hung off Emmett's arm, and they both watched their patriarch with trepidation. Rose knew what she had done and feared the repercussions of her mistake. Esme was trembling, and Carlisle rushed to her side. No one wanted to ask the questions or hear the answers. The silence truly was deafening.

It was Bella who broke the spell and did what he could not. "They're gone," she whispered.

Carlisle stared at her, surprised she had spoken.

Confirmation of what they feared most caused the family to cry out in their grief. The two couples comforted each other, but Jasper and Bella's arms were empty. They would never again hold their missing loved ones or exchange comforting words with them.

Suddenly, Jasper appeared in front of Bella. His eyes, black as coal, bored into her as venom pooled in his mouth. His face was but mere inches from hers, and she could feel his icy breath washing over her as he panted harshly.

"You!" he accused with a snarl.

"She died protecting me," Bella confessed, looking him in the eye.

"You don't deserve to live."

She welcomed his wrath. "I know."

The others watched with horror, frozen in place.

"I should have killed you when I had the chance."

"Make it right. Do it now." Bella inclined her head slightly, baring her throat to him.

Jasper's throat constricted as he swallowed the excess venom. His eyes narrowed in on her jugular as it pulsed. He wanted to rip, and tear, and crush, and kill. Part of him demanded her blood in retribution for his mate's death. However, the other part of him knew that killing the girl was not the answer. Alice would be angry and disappointed. She gave her life willingly for Bella. Her last words, asking him to take care of Bella, echoed through his mind, causing him to momentarily fight the urge to attack. In that instant of hesitation, Emmett and Carlisle tackled him to the ground.

Jasper went down without a fight and allowed them to restrain him. "Jasper, you don't want to do this," Carlisle reasoned with him.

The air was thick with emotions as Jasper lost control of his gift. He was too broken, his loss too great. "No, I don't. Death would be too easy," he bit out.

Shouting erupted as accusations and blame flew around the room.

"It's my fault."

"Edward brought it on himself."

"We all should have gone."

"It's her fault."

"She knew what she was doing."

"They chose to protect her."

"It's his fault."

"She's the reason they were there in the first place."

"We should have never left."

"You should have killed me when you had the chance," Bella murmured.

Everyone fell silent.

"What happened?" Emmett asked.

"Volturi," Carlisle hissed.

"We drove into Volterra," Bella began quietly. Everyone turned their attention to her, noting how rough her once soft voice sounded. "Alice made me get out of the car. She said I was the only one who could stop him. I was the only one he couldn't hear coming. Palazzo dei Priori. Edward was going to step out into the sun at noon in the middle of a festival. Two minutes. I made my way through the crowds, through a fountain, and there he was, in the alley under the clock tower just like she said. He was about to step out into the sun, but I stopped him. I stopped him! We ducked back into the shadows in the alley, but it was too late. Two vampires in cloaks appeared. They wanted to take him back to Aro and he refused. He had done nothing wrong. They insisted we both come with them. He must have heard something in their thoughts, because he crouched in front of me ready to fight. Then, Alice joined him. They argued, but then the little onecame and both Alice and Edward dropped to the ground, writhing in pain. The two big ones..." Bella tried to regain her composure while her whole body trembled with the effort. "They destroyed them. I watched them...burn." She bit her lip so hard that she drew blood, though none of the vampires were tempted. Their grief was too great. Sobs convulsed through her and she curled into the couch, finally shattering.

Esme sank to the floor, sobbing. Carlisle wrapped himself around her and rocked her gently like a child. Emmett vibrated with rage, wanting to rip the entire Volturi guard to shreds for this injustice. Rosalie held onto him, her shoulders shaking with sobs, eyes glistening with venom tears that would never fall. Her guilt was overwhelming, knowing her part in all of this.

Jasper. He sat unmoving on the floor where he had been tackled, his face a blank mask and his arms wrapped around his legs. He could not control the unbridled agony that ripped through him, and the family found their own grief magnified. It was an endless cycle that ebbed and flowed as he absorbed their pain, which in turn fueled his own. His reason for being had been taken from him. Thankfully, he didn't need to breathe because it felt like the he would never be able to breathe deeply again. He felt physical pain with the confirmation that his mate was indeed lost. It was easy to understand why Edward had taken off for Italy when faced with Bella's death. He had no desire to live in a world without Alice.

Rosalie had never hidden her disdain for the human who invaded their lives, and now she wasn't sure what she felt for the girl. Bella, a fragile human, had flown halfway around the world and run straight into the clutches of the world's most dangerous vampires to stop her brother from ending his life. He was only there because of her own insensitive phone call. If it weren't for those sadist assholes who called themselves the Volturi, Bella and Alice would have brought Edward home safe to them.

Eventually, Rosalie found her voice. "Why did they let her live?"

Carlisle cleared his throat and stood up, running his hands roughly through his hair. Esme disentangled herself from her husband and moved to the couch to try to comfort Bella. "Apparently, Bella is immune to Jane's gift, which is quite powerful. She projects crippling pain onto her target with her mind. She can hold whole groups under her spell while the rest of the guard destroys them. She is the one who incapacitated Alice and Edward. Bella was the first person to evade her gift." He blew out a breath as he put all the pieces together for the family. "Aro would have been furious if they had killed Bella before he got to see her. He can see every thought and memory you've ever had with one touch, but Bella's mind is shielded from him, like it was with Edward. With Bella having such a strong gift as a human, he wants her changed. So, she is now my responsibility."

He dropped his head into his hands. He was overwhelmed. Edward had been Carlisle's first companion and they'd been together for more than eighty years. He had lost a son, who was also his closest friend, and he was devastated. However, he had to keep it together in order to get his family through this crisis. Carlisle always knew he would most likely change Bella at some point, but he never expected it to be under these circumstances. Without Edward, he doubted she would still want immortality. However, it was no longer a choice, and that was the hardest part. If he allowed her to live, the Volturi would take her anyway. They would also take out his entire family. He had to protect them all. It was the only way.

"So you mean..." Emmett started, his eyes wide and still mostly black from rage.

Carlisle nodded wearily. "I have to change her."

Rosalie hissed, and Esme looked at Bella sympathetically.

"I don't get it. If Bella's supposed to be some super gifted vampire, then why didn't Aro change her himself?"

"I'm not sure, Emmett. It could be something as simple as the fact that he didn't want to deal with a newborn vampire. He did mention restitution, though I could never think of it that way. Aro's mind works much differently than most. Everything is a game to him. He is always plotting, scheming. I have no doubt he will want Bella back at some point if she does prove to be a gifted vampire, but we'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it. There are much more important things we need to take care of right now. I am going to need everyone's help."

"What is the plan?" Esme asked quietly.

Meanwhile, Bella had managed to reclaim the eerily calm demeanor she'd exhibited over the past few days. It was easier to hold herself together as long as she could find the numbness. She learned that when Edward left her the first time.

"Well, we have to consider Charlie. Bella left with Alice. Knowing that he is an officer of the law and a father who will not stop until he has answers, I thought it would be best if Alice and Bella disappeared overseas. When he starts investigating, he will find they both left the country and flew to Italy, but never returned. I had a new identity for Bella shipped overnight, so she never officially left the country."

"Carlisle, I think we need to reconsider." Jasper's voice startled him. He did not think the empath would be in any condition to participate in the discussion. In fact, he'd assumed Jasper would have already left, unable to deal with the power of everyone's emotions on top of his own grief. "There is no doubt that this story would go international, bringing all kinds unwanted attention. Three teens from a small town disappearing in Italy would be huge. We can't risk that kind of investigation, or attention. The Volturi would certainly destroy us then."

The patriarch respected Jasper's opinion in matters of this nature. He was a born strategist and had commanded armies, both human and vampire, for decades. Jasper handled most of the details involved in their ever-changing identities, making sure old ones were thoroughly erased and that their new ones left no questions unanswered. He was always thorough. Information was too easy to track now. It was much harder for his family to disappear and reappear these days, and Jasper was right, an investigation of this magnitude would be their undoing. They could either completely disappear for a century, or they had to figure out a new plan.

"What would you suggest?" Carlisle asked wearily.

"Bella could return to Forks for a week or so, until we were able to plan her death. We take her back and she gives a convincing story to Charlie for her absence. Then, we fake a car crash or some other accident. Something on a smaller scale with tangible evidence would work best, and it would be completely unrelated to our family."

Everyone found themselves nodding in agreement with Jasper.

Carlisle turned to the girl. "Bella, do you think you could do that?"

She nodded. "Whatever it takes."

"Alright, then we will work out the details and get you back to Forks." Carlisle scrubbed his face with his hands. He was exhausted, which should have been impossible for a vampire, but trying to deal with everything was taking its toll on him. He still had not been able to grieve properly, needing to make sure the situation with Bella was taken care of first. His family would move on autopilot for a while, but they would crumble eventually, once reality set in that Edward and Alice were not coming home. He'd expected Jasper to run, but even he seemed to be compartmentalizing and pushing back his own grief in order to complete the mission.

Somehow they all held it together – for now.


	3. Chapter 3

Bella took a deep breath and walked up the stairs to her room. It had been almost a week since she left Charlie with no more explanation than a note and facing his wrath was quite unappealing. Rosalie and Emmett had dropped her off as soon as the coast was clear and they would be staying in town until her death. Carlisle would be coming out in a few days to meet with the wolves and explain the situation. He had been surprised to hear of the resurgence of the shape shifters and explained how much more complicated this was now because of the treaty his family had with the Quileutes.

Once her bag was unpacked, she headed back down to the kitchen to call Charlie. Not ten minutes later, his face nearly purple in rage, her father barreled through the front door. Catching her off guard, he pulled her into a tight embrace and she felt his relief at having her back, unharmed. He stood back and checked her over for good measure before huffing and puffing his way to a good scolding.

"Isabella Marie Swan, don't you _ever_ take off like that again. Do you have any idea how worried I've been? You left no indication of where you were going, you didn't even call! I was about to put out a missing person's alert!"

"I know Dad, I'm sorry to have worried you. It won't happen again." Bella fought back the tears as she realized there wouldn't be time for him to worry about her again. In just seven days she would be dead to him. Luckily, her expression also made for a convincing apology.

Charlie's face lightened by a couple of shades of red and Bella was no longer worried he would drop dead from a heart attack. "Where were you?" He demanded.

"Edward needed me." She stated, struggling to keep her voice even.

"What's he to you? He just left you here..."

"He needed me, Dad. Edward didn't want to leave me and he was worse off than I was. Alice thought that if I went to visit him and we could talk, that it would help pull him out of his depression. Once I heard how bad off he was, I had to go. I had to try."

Charlie nodded, aware of his daughter's fierce loyalty to those she loves regardless of what they may have done to hurt her. "Did it help?"

Bella swallowed back tears. "A little."

"Are you ok, Bells? He's not coming back is he?"

She swiped at a traitor tear that had slipped down her cheek. "No Dad, he's not coming back." She mumbled, the finality of the words causing her heart to clench.

He patted her back and then pulled her in for another hug. "I love you, Bella, but you're still in trouble. You're not to leave the house except to go to school and work. Don't you ever think of taking off like that again."

Bella nodded as her heart clenched. "I understand. Love you too, Dad."

"I'll order pizza for dinner. You don't look like you're up for cooking."

"Sounds good, thanks. I'll cook tomorrow." She gave him a weak smile before he closed the door. Bella quickly gathered some clothes and took off for the bathroom to take a shower. As soon as she was in the water, the tears began to fall. This was going to be harder than she thought, but in order to keep her loved ones safe, she had to make it through this week. She was doing this for Charlie. Her life was forfeit, the least she could do was to give him closure. Such a silly, naïve, human girl to fall in love with a vampire. Did she really believe she would get a happy ending?

The Cullens may have said they wanted her to be a part of their family, but she knew that truthfully she would just be a burden to them. She ripped apart their family and they would never forgive her, regardless of what they said. Edward told her he loved her countless times and would never leave her. Everyone knew how that turned out that day in the woods. Vampires are fantastic liars, they have to be. Once again her humanity had ruined everything and she was forced to watch the man she loved and her best friend torn apart and burned right in front of her. They should have let the Volturi have her, maybe then they would still be alive. Of course she couldn't be sure what the Volturi would have done without her in the equation, but they might have had a chance. Alice had warned her on the way, the chances of them making it out alive weren't good. Bella just didn't understand why, out of the three of them, they had allowed her to live. She was nothing compared to Edward and Alice. She had begged them to take her too. She had tried to draw blood in order to spark their blood lust, but they caught on and kept her under constant watch. That last night, when Demetri made his intentions clear, she was frightened at first. Then she remembered how Edward had always stopped her physical advances, telling her he couldn't lose control for one moment because he could hurt her. She was sure Demetri's control was not nearly as good as Edward's and hoped this would mean the end. Instead, Marcus found them before he could do more than grope her and her new guard ignored her. She'd never expected Carlisle to come for her. When she saw his unmistakable topaz eyes, the corners crinkled with concern, she knew she would live.

Bella would see the plan through. She would give Charlie closure and make sure the Cullens were not implicated in her death. Then she would make her own plans before they had the chance to change her. When Jasper hovered over her, the hatred and anger rolled off him in suffocating waves. She was sure it would be over soon, but he hesitated and once again she was spared. Maybe she could tempt Jasper again and he could have his revenge. There was no doubt in her mind she was the cause of Alice's death, and she felt worse about that than Edward. Edward went willingly to Volterra and begged for death. Alice merely tried to save him and was destroyed with him instead. Alice's death would haunt her until her last breath.

Bella could make all the plans she wanted now, and no one would know. There was no one left to see the future.

The rapidly cooling water reminded her she'd been in there long enough. Bella scrubbed her face quickly, hoping the temperature of the water would help sooth her swollen eyes. Quickly dressing, she stumbled down the stairs to make the most of the time she had left with Charlie. Charlie watched her warily as she helped herself to a piece of pizza. She knew he worried she would relapse back into that zombie state she'd been in when Edward left, but she would make sure this last week left nothing but happy memories for him.

Bella sat with Charlie while he watched whatever game happened to be on the television. She watched him. She memorized everything she could about the man and regretted they'd not had more time together. After stifling a yawn, she excused herself.

"Goodnight, Dad."

"Night, Bella. You going to school tomorrow?" He turned away from the television to see her.

"Yep."

"I'll see you in the morning then."

She barely made it to her bed before the tears began to fall. Memories of summers and holidays spent with Charlie flashed through her mind. The last time she went fishing with him, Charlie caught four fish, and Bella caught a hook through her hand that required a tetanus shot and three stitches. She thought it was best if she avoided tempting fate any further after that and refused to go again. Now she wished she'd had those extra days with him.

Bella eventually cried herself to sleep, only to be jolted awake an hour later by the feeling that someone was in her room. Her first thought was that it was Edward, but a few more seconds allowed a bit more of the sleepy haze to clear from her mind and she realized he'd never again climb through her window. The window was open, and Rosalie was sitting in the rocking chair in the corner. It felt wrong. No one else should ever be sitting there. That was his chair. She was about to object when Rosalie spoke.

"I miss them." Bella just stared at the flawless vampire in confusion. "His scent still lingers in here, though I guess you probably can't tell." Rosalie frowned, clearly unsure of herself for once in her life.

"What do you want Rosalie?" Bella whispered, exasperated. She was not in the mood to deal with any drama tonight.

Bella blinked and suddenly Rosalie was on the bed next to her. Only a faint breeze indicated she'd moved at all. "I don't know, Bella." She watched the breathtaking blond as she crossed her legs, and noticed the mud on the hem of her jeans and shoes. She'd never seen Rosalie less than perfect. Looking harder, she noticed how absolutely rumpled she was. Also, she was fidgeting with the hem of her shirt nervously. Rosalie nervous?

"I owe you an apology, Bella. Hell, I owe you a lot of apologies, but I know nothing can change anything that has happened. I understand if you never talk to me again. I've treated you horribly, and what I did..." Rosalie blinked rapidly, as if staving off tears, though none could fall. It was an incredibly human gesture. When she spoke again, it was barely a whisper. "I destroyed everything. I understand if you can never forgive me, but I just want you to know I'll be here for you if you ever need me."

Bella's fought the urge to reach out and comfort Rosalie. She wasn't sure if it would be welcome. A movement out of the corner of her eye made her look up, and she saw Emmett's pale face as he crouched in the tree outside her window. He smiled sadly as he watched the two of them.

Rosalie regained her composure, mostly, and turned to Bella. "Anyway, I heard you talking in your sleep and I wanted to be here in case you started having another nightmare. The past few nights, you've been crying and screaming in your sleep. Carlisle and Esme have been able to calm you down...I don't know if you knew that, or not. We just didn't want Charlie to hear you and become suspicious. Carlisle gave me some sleeping pills if you need them, or you know, I could stay here with you, if it helps. Or Emmett...if you don't want me..."

Bella decided to give Rosalie a break and interrupted her. "It's ok." She murmured. "If you want to stay, I mean. Either one...or both of you."

"You don't mind?" Emmett asked from the window. Bella shook her head and shrugged. Having a couple vampires watching her sleep was nothing new, and she'd rather they stop her from screaming in her sleep than for Charlie to hear something he shouldn't. She didn't want him to worry.

Rosalie hesitantly patted her knee and moved back to the rocking chair. Bella laid back down in bed and she heard the window close as Emmett entered her room. It didn't take long for her fall asleep again. At some point, she was vaguely aware of cold, stone arms holding her and someone humming. It was enough to soothe her back to sleep from the awful images that plagued her nightmare. In the morning they were gone.

~~**~~

"Bella! Is everything ok? Where have you been?" Angela hurried to Bella's side.

"Yeah, everything is fine." She gave her friend what she hoped was a reassuring smile.

Angela glanced sideways at Bella, not believing her for a second. The good thing about Angela was that she didn't push for information. She would let it slide for now, and hope Bella felt like talking about it at some point. Bella knew she only had this week left with her friends. She didn't want to taint it with depressing topics, but she felt she owed Angela some kind of explanation. After a deep sigh, she continued. "I'll tell you about it at lunch ok? Let's eat outside, it's sunny for once."

"Sure." Angela agreed and they went to class.

Bella felt the curious stares and heard the whispers. They had finally stopped after she somewhat snapped out of her zombie phase, but after disappearing for a week, everyone had their own theories about her absence. She kept her head down and took studious notes, playing the role of a perfect student.

When lunch finally came, she met Angela outside at an empty table, far enough away from anyone else who might try to eavesdrop. Bella played with her apple, reminiscing about some of her first days here at Forks High School. Angela had always been kind to her, a true friend through everything. She couldn't have been happier to know her, though she wished she'd spent more time with her of course.

"Alice came to visit." Bella started.

Angela's eyebrows shot up with anxious curiosity. "Oh, really?"

Bella nodded. "It turns out Edward was having a hard time with the separation. He spiraled into a deep depression and his family was really worried about him." She sighed. The concocted story wasn't too far from the truth, at least if Edward had been human. "Alice thought if I tried to talk to him, it might help. So, I went."

Angela blew out a breath. "Wow. Ok, but didn't _he_ break up with _you_?"

"Yeah." She scoffed. "Apparently, he didn't want to break up with me, but he thought it would be best. He wanted me to move on and not have to worry about a long distance relationship."

"Did it help?"

"Huh?" Bella had been caught up in memories.

"Did seeing you help him?" She asked again.

"I guess. Maybe a little." Bella shrugged. "It was hard. We missed each other so much. He promised to get help."

"Well that's good."

"Yeah."

They finished their lunch in relative silence. The mood heavy and uncomfortable. Bella could tell Angela wanted to ask more questions, but she was worried about pushing her too much.

"Are you hanging out with Ben after school?" Bella asked as they walked to Bio.

A soft smile crept over Angela's face. "Yeah, but if you need to talk, just let me know."

"Nah, don't worry about it. I was just wondering if you'd want to do something together this week?"

"Sure, give me a call tonight and we'll plan." She replied a little too enthusiastically. It wasn't often Bella initiated any kinds of plans with anyone.

~~**~~

Bella welcomed the distraction of grocery shopping. The fridge was quite bare and whatever was there, had spoiled in the time she'd been away. She knew that keeping busy was necessary and had planned to cook every day, stocking Charlie's freezer to the hilt. Once she got everything put away at home, she began assembling the first of many freezer meals. To keep her mind occupied, the radio was on and she forced herself to sing along and focus on the music. A couple hours later, she had several containers in the freezers and had finished washing the dirty dishes, just in time to start dinner for Charlie. Bella welcomed the distraction.

Once everything was started, she decided to go through the living room and give it a deep cleaning. If she focused on one room per day, she would leave the house virtually spotless by the end of the week. She split her attention on the living room and dinner until Charlie came through the front door.

"Hey Bells."

"Hey Dad." She hugged him. She knew it was out of character, but she needed it.

"What smells so good?"

"Fajitas. You also have a freezer full of lasagna."

He eyed his daughter cautiously, wondering how long this seemingly good mood would last and if she was covering for something. It didn't seem right that she would be so upbeat after visiting with Edward. Regardless, he grabbed a beer and headed towards the living room.

"Wow Bells, I don't think I've ever seen this room cleaner. You sure you're ok? You're not on drugs are you?" He pursed his lips, scrutinizing her as the beer can was frozen inches from his lips.

"Of course not Dad. I can't believe you'd even suggest that. I was gone for a while and I'm grounded. The house, and the freezer, needed some attention and I'm stuck here, so I might as well take care of it."

He nodded and took that first sip of beer, before settling himself into his favorite chair. Bella watched her father as she finished up dinner. Conversation didn't come easy for them. Charlie was a man of few words, but what he did say mattered. Dinner was quiet, but he made sure she knew how much he appreciated it.

"Dad?"

"Yeah Bells?"

"I was wondering if Angela could come over one day this week? I haven't hung out with her in so long. I know I'm grounded, but..."

"Sure." He answered gruffly. She knew he didn't like the idea of punishing her, and he had been wanting her to spend more time with her friends. "But you didn't have to butter me up." He winked. She shrugged.

Once the kitchen was spotless again, Bella headed upstairs to work on the school work she had missed. She only focused on things that were due this week. Anything more would be superfluous.

Only in the shower, could she let everything out. The sound of the water drowned out her sobs as she cried for all she had lost, for all the Cullens had lost. The eternity she was facing was bleak. She would rather die. Bella's sobs turned into laughter at how hysterical the situation would be, if not so very tragic. When she wanted nothing more than to spend eternity with the man she loved, he refused. Now that she was being forced into immortality, there was nothing she wanted more than to remain human and face a natural death.

~~**~~

The rest of the week passed similarly and flew by. Each day she spent as much time talking to her friends as possible. Angela, Ben, and Mike had welcomed her back into their circle a few months ago, and just this past week Jessica began distancing herself from Lauren and spending more time at their end of the table. Each day Bella sought one of them out and made sure they knew how much their friendship meant to her. She didn't want to do it all at once to avoid rousing suspicions. Mike blushed when she hugged him and told him she'd wished things could have been different between them, but that he would make some girl very happy one day. It looked like that girl might be Jessica, as they were together again.

Every day she called Jake, but he refused to come to the phone or call her back, even when she pleaded with Billy that it was important. Bella knew she'd have to talk to him at some point before she left Forks, and dreaded the confrontation. She loved him, and had things been different, they could have been really good together. Charlie wouldn't let her drive to La Push either and didn't understand her insistence, so she stopped asking. On Thursday, she decided to just go without asking or calling Jake first. When she knocked on the door, no one answered, and when she tried to find someone to ask about his whereabouts, there was no one to be found. It seemed like the entire reservation was deserted, though she knew it was more likely they were all just avoiding her. She hoped Carlisle would have more luck contacting them for a meeting.

Charlie's freezer was packed and he'd enjoyed home cooked meals every day this week. She even insisted he take leftovers for lunches. The house was spotless and every piece of laundry had been done. She even washed the curtains and bed linens. Bella had gone through her belongings and began to pack away the few mementos she wanted to keep. One night, Emmett had found a loose floorboard and underneath it were all the items Edward had taken from her when he left. She'd replaced the photo into her album and slipped the CD into the bag she was taking. The plane tickets were still good, but there would be no way for her to visit Renee before the accident. She regretted not being able to say goodbye to her mother, but it was for the best. Renee would pick up on any strange behavior like excessive declarations of love or an influx of phone calls and emails when communication had always been so sparse between them. She sent one email on Wednesday, but it was just a vague update. Bella made sure to tell Renee she loved her and that she hoped to see her at graduation.

She accepted a sleeping pill from Rosalie on Friday night.

Saturday morning Charlie went fishing with Billy as usual. She'd said her veiled goodbye last night. The next twenty-four hours would be incredibly difficult. She would be declared dead, confront the pack with the situation, and be on her way to Canada with three vampires. It was a rainy day, perfect for their plans. The bear sightings provided the perfect cover story, and Carlisle had secured a pint of her blood to use at the scene. She didn't want to know the details, but trusted that Carlisle knew what he was doing.

Breakfast was unappealing to Bella, so she made one final round of the house and said her goodbyes. The sooner this was over, the better. Bella left one final note for Charlie, telling him she was going for a walk in the woods, then locked the door behind her with trembling hands. She met Emmett and Rose in the woods, not wanting to risk the prying eyes of any of the neighbors seeing a strange car or her leaving with them. Rose pulled her into a tight hug and then took her bag from her. Emmett scooped her up into his arms, holding her close for a moment, and then they took off through the woods to the Cullen house.

Carlisle was waiting for them, and after appraising Bella's emotional state, he slipped a pill into her hand. "This will help you make it through the day Bella." For once in her life, she didn't argue. This was the first time she'd been back in the Cullen house and the memories were hitting her hard. No matter where she looked, Alice and Edward's ghosts surrounded her. When she laid eyes on the piano she began to hyperventilate and promptly passed out.

When Bella finally came to, she realized she was Rosalie's arms. Emmett and Carlisle sat across from them, watching her with concern. All three vampires looked tired. The emotional drain evident in their expressions. "Would something of his help soothe you, or make it worse?" Rose murmured.

Carlisle was at her side with a glass of water. Bella took the time while she was drinking to think about Rose's question. Once Carlisle was assured she was alright, she replied shakily. "I can't go up there, but I'd like something." Rose nodded and disappeared up the stairs. She returned quickly and handed Bella a shirt, then placed a smaller bag inside of Bella's. Bella brought the shirt to her nose and inhaled his sweet scent, sobs of relief and sorrow escaped her. She pulled the shirt over her own and frantically tried to regain her composure. She had to make it through today. Just one more day.

The calming effects of the anti-anxiety medicine Carlisle gave her began to work through her system. She no longer felt like she was about to crawl out of her skin, and it was easier to remain in control of her emotions.

"It's time." Carlisle stated simply and held out his arms for Bella. He cradled her to his chest and the three vampires took off out of the house and through the woods to the treaty line. Memories were drudged up of running with Edward and their meadow. She blinked back the tears once again and tried to focus on the task at hand.

When they stopped, they were greeted by three giant wolves. Bella immediately recognized Sam, Jacob and Jared. She wondered why the rest of them had not come, but figured they must have wanted even numbers between the two mortal enemies. After a few tense minutes, they entered the tree line and phased back.

"We assumed your mind reader would be with you." Sam's words make Bella choke up with emotion. Rose moved to comfort her and Jake growled.

"That is part of what we need to discuss with you. He is no longer walking this earth." Carlisle explained, bowing his head. Jake was visibly surprise and his eyes darted back and forth between the two groups and Bella.

"Bella?" Jake asked tentatively.

"He's gone." She whispered. "Alice too."

It was hard for him to contain the relief he felt hearing the information, but he knew Bella had loved them and her heart was broken. Jacob rocked forward, his arms automatically reaching out to comfort the girl he loved. Sam held out his arm to stop Jake from crossing the treaty line. "What happened? Why have you called a meeting?"

"I'm sure Jake told you that I took off with Alice to go to Italy?" Bella spoke softly, but everyone could hear her easily. Sam nodded. "When I jumped from the cliff, Alice saw me and came to Forks because she thought I had died. Rosalie told Edward, and he went to Italy to ask the Volturi to end his life."

"Who are the Volturi?" Sam turned to Carlisle.

"They are essentially the ruling class in the vampire world. They maintain and enforce our laws." He explained.

Bella continued. "Alice and I went to stop him. We got there in time, and I stopped him from revealing himself, but the guard had different ideas. They forced Edward and Alice into a fight and destroyed them." Her voice had become strangely detached as she spoke. "When their gifts didn't work on me, they took me to their leaders." Jared snorted at the line and Sam smacked him in the chest, warning him with a growl.

Jake's eyes were wide with panic. "Bella." He moaned, the urge to go to her coursing through every cell in his body. He remembered the words he exchanged with Alice before they left. Bella had fallen into the hands of the kind of vampires he was made to destroy. "How did you escape?" His voice was just loud enough for her to hear his question.

Bella looked up into Jake's glittering brown eyes. Hers were wet with tears and shadowed in grief. "I am bound by their law. I must be changed." Jacob's entire body began to tremble uncontrollably.

"Jacob!" Sam stepped in front of him, commanding him to control himself. He'd placed himself between the wolf and the girl, crouched and ready to phase in case he needed to intercept Jacob. After a few tense moments, the trembling stopped, but his eyes were cold and hard.

"What law?" Sam demanded, his eyes still on Jacob.

"We must keep our kind a secret from humans. If one should find out, it is a death sentence. The Volturi are intrigued enough by Bella's resistance to their powers that they demanded she be changed instead of killed."

"No!" Jake's sharp reply echoed off the trees.

"I don't have a choice Jake. They will kill me, the Cullens, and probably even Charlie if I'm not changed."

"We can protect you Bells. You can live on the res, they'll never get to you." His voice turned plaintive.

Bella shook her head, steeling herself. "It won't work Jacob. They could take out the entire tribe in a matter of minutes. I won't put you all in that kind of danger."

Paul scoffed. "We could take them."

Carlisle spoke this time. It was the first time Bella had ever seen him this angry. He truly looked vampiric as his coal black eyes glittered with rage. "No you could not. You do not understand the kind of powers these vampires have. They have one who can inflict pain and drop the whole pack in seconds. By the time you recovered, the entire tribe would be slaughtered. Another one of them can take away all your senses, leaving you anesthetized. You wouldn't even feel your own death. Yet another one of them can track you anywhere, so even if we were to run and try to hide Bella, they would find her. We've tried to think of every conceivable alternative, and this is the only way."

The wolves appeared taken aback, and just as angry, realizing the situation may very well be hopeless.

"If there was any other way, I wouldn't do it Jake. This is the only way. I can't let any more innocent people die because of me." Bella moved closer to the treaty line, her eyes focused solely on the boy she'd known her whole life. The one who pieced her back together and taught her to live again. "Jake." She whispered, reaching out for him. Bella stepped over the treaty line and he pulled her into his arms. They sank to the ground, holding each other desperately. "I tried to call you this week. I needed to see you. I even went to your house. Charlie grounded me and I had to sneak out, but I tried. I love you, Jake, but you have to let me go."

Fat tears rolled down Jacob's russet cheeks. Bella was tucked into his chest, his face buried in her hair. "Please, Bella. I can't lose you." He pleaded with her.

'You're going to find the right girl for you one day. You're going to be so happy and have a beautiful family. You deserve it all and more. I will always love you."

Jake shook his head, refusing to give in. "_We_ can have that Bella. I can give you all that and keep you safe."

"If there was any other way...Jake you can't fight them. I won't let you fight them. I can't lose you too!" Bella could barely keep the lid on the hysteria bubbling up inside of her.

"Then we'll run."

"They can track us, Jake. I don't want to live my life hiding and running, never seeing our friends and family. Never knowing if we're safe or if they're going to find us. Jake that's no kind of life." She placed her trembling hands on either side of his face and made him look at her. "Jake I watched them die, right in front of me. One look from the little one and they both dropped to the ground writhing in pain. Within seconds they were ash. They never had a chance. The only reason I'm alive is because of my screwed up brain. Her gift didn't work on me. They think I'm going to be some kind of special vampire. If I don't do this, more people will die. I can't let that happen. You have to understand. You have to let me go." She ran her small pale hands over his broad shoulders and back, trying to soothe the hulking boy whose body shook with sobs. She soaked up his overwhelming heat, as she had been chilled to the bone since Volterra. They looked into each other's eyes. They drank in the sight of each other. They lightly traced their fingers over each other's faces, memorizing every feature. Hers pale and delicate, his copper and rugged.

Everyone else turned away, not wanting to intrude on such an intimate moment. The vampires wondered about the relationship that had developed between the two in their absence.

Carlisle addressed Sam. "We need to discuss the treaty."

Sam nodded. "I suppose so."

"We have to change her. I know you care nothing of our kind, but they are my family. I've already lost a son and a daughter. I cannot lose any more of them. Regardless of what you think of us, we still have human feelings. We are capable of love, and we feel things very deeply. We didn't ask for this life, but we try to make the best of it."

Sam nodded, understanding what the blond vampire was saying and trying to fight against his natural instinct to hate the creature standing before him.

"Just like you had to learn to control the wolf aspect of your nature, we have learned to control our bloodlust. My family is not like the others. You know this. We will make sure she does not harm any humans."

With a heavy sigh, Sam acquiesced. "We will allow you to turn Bella on one condition." He tilted his head and Carlisle nodded for him to continue. "Your family never returns to Forks."

Rosalie gasped, but Carlisle understood. Their presence in the area seemed to be related to the resurgence of shifters. The change wasn't something the Quileutes looked forward to. It was simply necessary in order for them to protect their tribe against his kind.

"May we visit? For Bella's sake? I'm sure she would like to check up on Charlie from time to time."

"That would be acceptable. I'm sure a few days here and there wouldn't be enough to trigger the wolf gene. You must let us know when you are coming though, so we can observe the treaty line."

"You have my word, then. We will no longer use Forks as a permanent residence." Carlisle held out his hand across the line to Sam, and the Alpha took it in a quick but firm grasp.

Jacob and Bella had disentangled themselves and she'd crossed back to the Cullen's side of the line. Her arms were wrapped tightly around her torso and her eyes swollen from crying. Jacob watched her with a pained expression on his face. He couldn't tear his eyes away from this girl he loved and had hoped to have a family with.

"We need to get going." Carlisle told her.

"Wait! Now?" Jake exclaimed.

Carlisle nodded. He didn't want to discuss the details in front of Bella. "We've already set up the accident. It's about a half a mile behind the Swan house. Animal attack."

Sam grimaced. "We'll take care of anything else."

"Bella!" Jake called again, his voice cracking.

"I tried to talk to you sooner Jake. I'm sorry." She had stopped trying to hold her sobs in and ran across the line once more into his arms. Standing up on her toes, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her, pressing her lips to his. They shared a desperate kiss before she pulled away to catch her breath. He hugged her tightly to him and pressed his forehead to hers.

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you too, Jake. Always. I'll come back...later...when I have control...if you ever want to see me..."

"I don't know, Bella. I don't know." He shoved his hands into his hair, tormented by the idea that his Bella would be a vampire, his mortal enemy. Thoughts raced frantically through his mind. "Gah! I don't care. Yes. _Yes! _ Come back whenever you can."

"Take care of Charlie?"

"Of course."

"Go, Jake." With one last tender kiss to her lips, he turned and phased, launching himself into the woods. Tiny pieces of his shredded black sweatpants wafted through the air like confetti and a sorrowful howl pierced the air.

Bella dropped to her knees and before she could register what happened, she was in someone's arms, speeding through the forest, back towards the Cullen's house. Carlisle wasted no time loading her into his Mercedes and they raced out of Forks with Rose's red BMW hot on their bumper. Bella curled up in her seat, with her forehead against the glass, watching the trees blur together as they flew by.

Bella had once thought that dying in place of someone she loved wasn't such a bad way to go. Now, here she was, dying to protect all her friends and family, but there was nothing comforting or noble about it. Only raw grief for all she had lost and what would never be.


	4. Chapter 4

Bella wondered if this was what a prisoner on death row felt like. She was confined to a house in the middle of Canada awaiting her death. They had joined what was left of the family somewhere in northern Manitoba after leaving the meeting with the wolves in Forks. For three days Bella had been sitting in this room with the shades drawn, waiting for them to decide when to do it. Every so often, one of them would bring in a tray of food for her, but she had no appetite. Merely thinking about eating caused her stomach to twist and heave.

The family was grieving. She understood that. Rarely did she hear anything other than the occasional sobbing. Whenever anyone ventured into her room, their expression was drawn and they looked at her with pity. She couldn't stand it.

_I am tired of waiting. _ She thought as she looked out the window for the first time. The sun was shining, and sky was a bright blue.

"I'm going for a walk." Bella told Esme and Carlisle, as she headed to the front door and slipped on her shoes. They looked at her with surprise and skepticism. She needed to get out of that house, away from these vampires who blamed her for their losses.

Bella could feel Esme watching her from the house as she headed off towards the woods, and she wondered how long it would take before she followed her. Wrapping her arms around herself, she carefully found a path through the woods. There was a river nearby and she wanted to find it. The soothing sounds of water tripping over rocks was appealing to her at the moment. Bella stopped her trek through the trees when she found a small area that looked as if it had been touched by a tornado. She instinctively knew one of her vampires had been there, working out their grief and anger on the local flora. Trees were shattered and splintered and a branch as thick as her thigh was embedded through the trunk of one of them. She picked up one of the rocks that lay scattered around and wished she had superhuman strength with which to crush it. Instead she launched it into a nearby tree with a shout. The release felt good, and before she knew it, Bella was angrily whipping rocks into the trees and letting out all the anger she held over her situation. It seemed to be a fairly effective therapy until one of the rocks ricocheted right back at her, slicing across her cheek. She welcomed the stinging pain as she brought her fingers up to her face only to find she was bleeding. Then she felt the maniacal laughter bubbling up from deep inside her. As far as she could tell, there was no sane reason to laugh, but she couldn't stop it. When she moved to Forks and found Edward her life turned upside down, and now her life was so screwed up she had no clue which way was up.

Eventually, her laughter turned into sobs and Bella crumbled to the forest floor shuddering and gasping for breath. The girl keened as her fists gripped her hair, rocking to and fro on the ground. Esme watched from a distance as her newest daughter fell to pieces, finally grieving for all she had lost. The silence Bella had embraced made them all uneasy, and Jasper's assessment had them worried she would try to hurt herself. After all, she had offered her blood, her life, to Jasper already. They couldn't be certain that she would not try again. As Bella continued to sob, she began to thrust her fists into the rocky ground. Esme ran to her and held her safe in a mother's embrace, trapping her fists between them. It wasn't long before she heard the unmistakable footsteps of her mate approaching and he stooped to the forest floor to hold both of them in the stone circle of his arms. Rose and Emmett followed soon after, though they kept their distance, lending moral support simply by being there. Jasper would not be joining them, he had run off the day before yesterday and they had no idea when to expect him back, if at all. The emotions of everyone in the house overwhelmed the empath, who had the loss of his own mate to mourn. It was not something a vampire ever got over. When they mate, it's for life. For the rest of his existence he would feel as if he was missing half of himself, and no one expected that he would stay with the family, though they did hope he would. The vampires felt the venom welling up in their eyes, but Bella was the only one who could truly cry. They all yearned for the release. Bella's sobs were slowing down, and when she finally managed a deep breath, she let out an anguished roar that echoed through the trees. With that done, she collapsed into Carlisle and Esme's arms, entirely spent, her tiny body exhausted. They didn't have to be empaths to feel the utter desolation the young human was experiencing.

Bella awoke, back in her room, her prison. She had no memory of how she got there, though it wasn't hard to figure out one of the vampires had brought her back. A foreign feeling on her cheek made her reach up to explore what it was, and then she saw the bandages on her hands. Her fingers found a similar bandage on her cheek and she vaguely remembered the sting of a rock slicing through her flesh. Bella suddenly realized someone was in her room. Whipping her head to the side, she saw the familiar blond mop of the empath.

"Jasper." She barely whispered.

His eyes, black as coal in the moonlight that filtered in through the window, watched her intently. "Tell me what happened. I have to know."

"I already told you." Bella briefly wondered if the scent of blood from her wounds would be enough to encourage his attack.

"I won't do it, Bella." Vampires, especially empath vampires, were entirely too observant.

"Please." She sounded desperate. She was desperate. She knew once she was a vampire, death would not come easy. Although she did remember Edward's own words on that fateful birthday night. _...you don't irritate the Volturi. Not unless you want to die – or whatever it is we do... _Could she find the Volturi?

Ignoring her pleading, he repeated his request. "Tell me what happened."

"What more do you want to know?"

"Everything. I have to know everything." His voice almost cracked from the pain. "Every detail."

Bella began quietly, explaining the chain of events from the moment Jacob Black answered the phone call from Edward. She told him about their discussion on the plane.

"_I hate lying to him."_

"_Because if they're there and Volturi kill Edward, they'll fight them Bella."_

"_If there were any chance we could win...if there was a way that the four of us could save my brother by fighting for him, maybe it would be different. But we can't, and Bella, I can't lose Jasper like that."_

"_I promised him I would get out before they killed me too. It's not something I can guarantee – not by a long shot."_

"_If we're too late for Edward, I'm going to do my damnedest to get you back to Charlie, and I don't want any trouble from you."_

"_...they're waiting for him."_

"_We're not dead, not yet! But we have to get out of here before the Volturi..."_

"Finally he understood and yanked me into the alley. My back was against the wall, and he stood protectively in front of me. He told them he no longer needed their services and that we would be on our way, but they kept insisting he go with them. He tried to send me back into the festival, agreeing to go with them, but they demanded he bring me too. The two guardsmen spread out, planning to take Edward from two sides at once. He was tensed, ready to fight. Then Alice was there, and they straightened up, not happy with even numbers I guess. They continued to insist we all go with them, and Edward refused...until a third one joined them. She looked like a child. The two guardsmen relaxed with relief, but Edward seemed resigned. It was as if they all knew something, like there was no escape now and the child vampire had something to do with it. Alice hugged me to her and whispered for me to make it home, to take care of you. _I love him more than my own life._"

Bella allowed herself to look at Jasper after this revelation. He showed no reaction to her words other than a slight tilt of his head, so she continued.

"As soon as she released me, Edward pulled me to him and told me he loved me. He kissed me then and seconds later, they both dropped to the ground, writhing in agony. I had no idea what was happening and the three guards stared at me. When I began to scream, a cold hand clamped down over my mouth and they quickly moved us deeper into the dark alleys of the city, far away from prying eyes. The next thing I knew, Edward and Alice were both in pieces. I'll never forget the sound...those horrible sounds..." Bella's chest constricted, and she wasn't sure if she'd be able to finish. She closed her eyes, steeling herself. If Alice had been brave enough to give her life for Bella, this was the least she could do for Jasper. He needed to know the last moments of his mate's life, and she was the only one who could give that closure to him.

"Then there was a flame and smoke...purple smoke...then ash. It all happened so quickly. They were there holding me...and then they were ash...and the guards were laughing..." Bella spat the last words with more vitriol than he had ever seen her possess before. "They laughed like it was some kind of game." She looked him in the eye and her glare was furious. "I have never wanted to kill someone as much as I wanted to in that moment." The hatred and determination she was throwing off matched his own. Jasper knew he would go to Volterra himself and kill the ones responsible. They came to a silent understanding. There would be revenge.

"Why did they let you live?" Jasper asked, almost as an afterthought.

"They didn't." Guilt and shame. Pain and sorrow. So many emotions accompanied her words.

Bella felt a faint breeze, and noticed he was no longer in the room.

~~**~~

"Are you sure you're ready?" Carlisle was concerned. He'd done this several times, but each time the person was already dying. Bella was perfectly healthy and he was heavy with the guilt he felt at taking away her humanity. He didn't have a choice really. The Volturi would find them wherever they tried to run. Demetri would have no problem tracking them down. He couldn't risk the rest of his family. He'd already lost too much. At least this way, Bella would still be alive...in a sense. She would still have a family who cared for her. She would never get sick or grow old. Yet, they all had their regrets, things they missed about their humanity.

"Just get it over with, Carlisle." Bella's voice betrayed no emotion. She lay on the bed in comfortable clothes, though there was nothing comfortable about what she was about to go through.

"I will give you some morphine and that should dull the pain." He explained.

"No."

"No?"

"No morphine. I need to feel it." He looked into her brown eyes for the last time, and found them frighteningly empty and flat.

Carlisle nodded hesitantly. His compassionate nature battled with his understanding of why she needed this. The guilt of inflicting this pain and this life on her overwhelmed him.

"Do it." She demanded, tired of waiting. Her tiny fists impatiently slammed into the bed she would never sleep in again.

Carlisle pressed a fatherly kiss to her forehead, silently saying a prayer for her and wishing her peace.

His razor sharp teeth pressed against the translucent skin on her neck and easily tore through her flesh, delivering the damning venom into her veins. He followed with bites to each wrist and ankle, elbow and knee, injecting as much venom into her system as possible. It was less than a minute before she began to writhe in pain.

Carlisle spat out the small amount of blood that collected in his mouth, and wiped his lips to remove any trace of the red nectar. "It is done." He murmured to himself, taking her hand in his and starting his vigil at her side. It did not escape him that it should have been Edward by her side as she endured this transformation. Bella should have woken up to the topaz eyes of the vampire who loved her more than anything. It should have been his venom coursing through her body, turning it into immortal stone.

As the pain intensified, Bella grit her teeth and clamped her eyes shut. She was determined to endure this silently, welcoming the burning pain that would ravage her flesh and bone, blood and sinew. As she watched two people she loved burned to ash for protecting her, so would she now endure this burning in penitence for being the cause of their deaths. She held the images of those she loved in her mind as long as possible, never wanting to forget Edward or Alice, Charlie or Renee or Jacob. Like a flickering filmstrip from years past, the images played over and over, burning them into her memory as her entire being was reconstructed. She surrounded herself with the love that Edward poured into their last kiss. Bella wanted to make sure she remembered everything about him in her new life. It would have been easy to forget, as human memories fade after the change. She didn't deserve to forget. This pain would stay with her for eternity, giving her purpose.

The hours passed and Carlisle was aware of every minute change occurring in her body. He could hear her cell structure being reinvented. He could smell the way the venom mixed with her blood as it transformed her from human to vampire. He could see her features changing subtly. Her skin smoothed and hardened. Her cheekbones became more pronounced. Her hair and eyelashes thickened and lengthened. The color drained from her already pale skin, but her lips plumped and reddened. Gone forever was her endearing blush as her blood would no longer pump beneath her silky granite skin.

Each of the remaining Cullens, save Jasper, who was nowhere to be found, took turns sitting with Bella as she was reshaped into an immortal. Their cooling touch was soothing to Bella, mostly because it reminded her of him. Nothing could truly take away the burning pain that raced through her anatomy, but she could endure it. For him. For Alice. Her thoughts turned to those of revenge and when capable of coherent thought, she would picture ripping the heads off the tiny vampire child and two guards that made sport of tearing her loved ones to pieces. The thought of watching those monsters burn to ash was exhilarating.

Carlisle prayed while he sat with Bella. Rose and Esme hummed while they stroked her hair. Emmett entertained her with jokes and stories, not knowing if she could hear him or not, but he hoped it provided some amount of comfort. He loved this little human girl as if she was his baby sister. He vowed he would protect her and teach her hunt grizzlies.

Bella didn't know how long she had been burning, time held no meaning, but when she heard Carlisle say it wouldn't be much longer, she was relieved. The fire was already retreating from her fingertips and toes. She had felt her mind expand, as if her head was filled with infinite amount of space and a hundred different thoughts flew through it all at once. As her other senses sharpened, it nearly overwhelmed her. She could smell the cotton of the sheets she was laying on, layered with the scent of laundry detergent and fabric softener. She could feel the dust motes as they swirled through her nasal passages as she inhaled. Other scents assaulted her. Leather and apple, earth and lavender, vanilla and pear, cinnamon and salt. Bella could hear everything. There were so many sounds that it felt like her head was engulfed in a deafening roar. As her brain quickly processed the sounds, she could distinguish each individual noise. Water dripping, wind blowing, shallow breathing, paws padding through the forest outside, leaves rustling...the river? She could hear the river from here?

The fire was retreating from the rest of her body, but seemed to be building in her heart. It beat so fast and furiously that she though it was going to explode. The fire burned impossibly hotter as her back arched off the bed. She heard the others' footsteps as they moved across the room from her. "Give her some space." A strange, but familiar voice whispered. _Carlisle? _His voice had always been musical and beautiful, but now it was like an entire symphony playing a lullaby. His words blanketed her with calm. Just as she thought her heart could not possibly beat any faster and the fire could not possibly burn any hotter – it all stopped.

There was an absence of pain. There was no heartbeat. There was no rush of blood through her veins. No one in the room was breathing. She held her breath, expectantly, waiting for something, but not knowing what.

Then Bella opened her eyes.

_Oh..._

Everything was so clear and sharp. She could see the individual dust motes floating through the air. Each tiny bump and ridge was visible on the ceiling. The light from the lamp beside her bed was fractured into a spectrum and there were more colors than she could name and doubted anyone but vampires had ever seen them.

_Vampire._

Bella was a vampire now. She considered sitting up to take in more of her surroundings, and found she was already upright, her body moving before she was aware of it. The look of surprise on her face caused Emmett to chuckle and the sound startled her. She found herself crouched on the other side of the bed, scanning the room for danger. When she laid her eyes on the grinning vampire, her stance relaxed. She knew Emmett would never hurt her, despite his gargantuan size. His dimples gave him away.

Bella's eyes lingered on each of the four vampires in front of her. Carlisle and Emmett stood slightly in front of Esme and Rose, their protectiveness over their mates was instinctual. Before she could fully appreciate their beauty, a familiar pain stabbed through her chest and she collapsed to her knees. Images of Edward and Alice flashed through her mind. Both of them crouched protectively in front of her in an alley on the other side of the world. Purple smoke whirled through the haze of her mind as she was bombarded with wave after wave of memories. She did not forget. These memories would never fade with time.

Carlisle was by her side the instant she crumpled in pain, terrified something had gone wrong during the change. He had wanted Jasper to be here to help with all this, but they had no idea when, or if, he would be back. Jumping swiftly into the doctor mindset, he began to assess her. Carlisle had never seen a vampire double over in pain, unless Jane was involved.

"Bella, what is it?" He asked when he could find nothing tangible causing her pain.

"Edward." She gasped, her fingers shredding the carpet and cracking the wood beneath that as she grasped at something to try to hold herself together.

Her newborn strength was no match for his, but Emmett managed to pull her hands from the floor and wrap them around himself. She couldn't do as much damage to his marble frame as she could to the house. Rose joined them as Bella sobbed and gasped against Emmett's chest, her own eyes swimming with venom at her sister's pain. She stroked her hair, offering what little comfort she could. Bella couldn't stop the barrage of images flickering through her mind. Every moment she had spent with Edward and Alice flashed behind her eyelids, burning themselves into her eternal memory. Her chest felt as if it had been flayed open, the pain much stronger than the hole he left when he said goodbye to her in the woods.

When she thought she could stand it no longer, the images of their last moments in that alley were replayed before the unending filmstrip finally flickered out. She was left empty and aching. Bella peeled her arms off of Emmett, her fingertips grazing the frayed edges of where she had ripped his shirt. She picked herself up from the floor and took a moment to study the vampires surrounding her. They didn't deserve to be burdened with her. They had done their part and now she should leave. She knew Carlisle would feel obligated to care for her, but she had caused enough pain for this family. Jasper would probably never come back as long as she was there, as Bella was a constant reminder of what he had lost and why, and he needed his family to help him through this.

"You should hunt." Carlisle told her and she nodded, absently stroking her throat as she swallowed convulsively. There was a slight burn there, as if she had been wandering the desert without water for days.

Bella followed Carlisle and Emmett out to where the forest started and they began to give her pointers for her first hunt.

"Let your instincts take over."

"Listen. What do you hear?"

"Don't bite too hard, or else you'll sever the head from the body."

"Snap it's neck first. It's more humane."

She looked sadly at the two vampires who flanked her and silently wished them peace. "I'm sorry." She murmured, knowing they heard her, and then she ran. The feeling of freedom and power surged through her as she flew through the trees.

It took a while before they realized that she was running away from them and not hunting. Bella knew the moment they figured it out because their pace increased as they tried desperately to catch up with her. _Edward had always been fastest._ She could hear their pleas from far behind her, and even heard Carlisle's call to Esme, asking for help. Her newborn speed would give her the advantage and eventually they would give up and let her go. They didn't want her and would probably be relieved that they no longer had to deal with her. After all, they did leave her behind without so much as a goodbye. She wasn't good for them. She didn't belong in their world. The familiar thoughts continued running through her mind. _They didn't want her._

Bella now understood why Edward loved running. The raw power pulsed through her as her legs pumped tirelessly. As she ran at blinding speeds, she could still see everything in fine detail. The dew and veins on every leaf. The ants marching along a tree trunk. A moth, camouflaged against the bark. Branches snapped off the trees as she plowed through them. They couldn't hurt her now. Before she realized it, she had swung herself up into a passing tree and began leaping and flipping from branch to branch. Maybe they would lose her scent faster if she stayed off the ground. She vaguely heard the sounds of living creatures around her, but had no temptation to stop and hunt.

The newborn vampire continued to run across the Canadian landscape, paying no heed to towns or provinces or borders. Three days later, when she could no longer hear the others behind her, she finally slowed. Bella had crisscrossed the entire country, unsure of where she ended up. All she knew was that there were no humans around and she was far from any civilization. She swung herself up into a tree and perched on a branch.

Carlisle and Emmett had followed her scent for days Esme and Rose had found a second trail, and when he came across a third intersecting trail, Carlisle decided to give up the chase. It was obvious that she was trying to escape them and her path now consisted of a confused mess impossible to navigate. They needed to regroup and form a plan. They had no idea why Bella would want to run from them, especially now. She was a newborn, and Carlisle feared for her being out on her own. No one had come across any evidence that she had fed, from either animal or human, which concerned him even more. He was responsible for her and if she should cave to her insatiable thirst by taking out an entire town, not only would it be a shameful loss of human life, but the wrath of the Volturi would mean the end of his family. The safety of his family was not his only concern, he worried for Isabella. She had been through so much, and he knew she was hurting. Carlisle wanted to be there for her. His family wanted to be there for her. They had all looked forward to her joining them as a daughter and sister. They could not lose her. Why would she run?

Everyone gathered back at their home in Manitoba. From there they would spread out, each of them moving along a cardinal point, zigzagging across the Canadian wilderness. Hopefully they would catch her scent and could hone in on where she might be. The two couples did not want to separate for the search, but they knew it would be more efficient if they did. And so they each took off. Carlisle to the west. Esme to the north. Emmett to the east. Rosalie to the south.

They clung to the hope that they could find her quickly.


	5. Chapter 5

"Get here as soon as you can. I need your help." He spoke quickly into the cell phone.

When he ran across the faint scent of another vampire so close to his territory, he decided to investigate. Peter and Charlotte had just returned to their cabin here after living as nomads for the past few years. He followed the scent into the neighboring forest and what he found there intrigued him. The small female looked feral. Her eyes completely black and surrounded by deep purple shadows, pale marble flesh drawn tightly across her tiny frame. She crouched on a tree limb, arms wrapped around her knees. The tatters that remained of her clothing did little to cover her body. The only response he received for his approach was a quiet hiss. Clearly she was not well. He did not want to try to handle her on his own, but it was actually what he found in the surrounding trees that prompted him to put a call in to his old friend.

Peter had never come across a vampire in the wild like this. She reminded him of a newborn, and though he had plenty of experience in dealing with them, Jasper was much more adept at it, and his gift would be a great asset in controlling the vampire, should she prove to be difficult.

"Who are you?" He asked, as he took a submissive stance, not wanting to frighten her.

Her black eyes focused on him, but she did not speak.

"Tell me what you are doing here." He commanded in a stronger voice.

There was no response.

He took a few steps closer to the tree where she was perched and she let loose another quiet hiss.

From what he could tell, it appeared that she had not fed in quite some time. It was possible that she was too weak to move, and he wondered what had happened to her. Any other vampire would have either answered his questions or crouched defensively, ready for a fight. The fact that she did neither, was not lost on him. He just couldn't be sure if she was simply weak or if something more was wrong with her. If she was addled, he would have to destroy her.

Thankfully, Jasper said he could be there in a few hours. He must not have been too far away. Ever since he lost his mate, he had been wandering. Peter hated seeing his friend in so much pain. Their paths had crossed a couple months ago, and one look at the strange orange hue of his irises told him how conflicted the once vegetarian vampire had become. Jasper tried to keep a hold on his emotions while they visited, but bursts of agonizing pain would slip through every so often. He'd left his coven because their pain only magnified his own and he couldn't deal with it. Jasper didn't visit long before moving on again. It had been nice to see him, but Peter wished it had been under better circumstances.

The vampire world was one of kill or be killed, but there were some who preferred a more peaceful existence. While Peter and his mate shared a mostly nomadic life and lived off human blood, he had grown fond of the animal drinking Cullens that lived as a family. He knew how hard the loss of both Edward and Alice had hit them, and as the news spread, there was a rumble of revolt against the Volturi. Carlisle was highly respected amongst his kind, even if his lifestyle was considered a bit odd. There had been rumors flying for decades concerning the Volturi's actions. They were supposed to be leaders who protected the secrecy of the vampire world and provided justice, but the three brothers had grown greedy for power. Now it seemed their main objectives were to collect or destroy. Gifted vampires from all over were being tracked and issued an ultimatum. Join or die. Covens were being destroyed. Sweet Alice had done nothing to deserve her fate. She had never harmed anyone. She had never even tasted human blood. Peter could not imagine someone taking Charlotte from him. It was because of Jasper that they had escaped Maria's death sentence and given a chance to spend eternity together. He had been ecstatic for his brother when Alice found him. She helped him overcome his past and brought him so much love and happiness. Now he was merely a shell of the vampire he used to be and Peter wondered if his friend would ever find purpose in his life again.

Peter had called Charlotte next and asked her to bring something for the strange vampire to feed on. Though he didn't want to give it to her until Jasper arrived, because if she regained her strength, he wasn't sure he could handle her alone. Letting her loose could be disastrous and Peter had no desire to bring any of the Volturi's wrath onto himself and his mate.

Bracing himself against a tree across from her, Peter merely observed her while he waited. He tried a few more times to get her to speak, but it seemed that she was either determined to keep silent or perhaps unable to form the words.

Jasper had been within running distance of Peter's current home, so it only took him three hours to arrive at the house. He followed his old friend's familiar scent into the forest. He was aware of another vampire's scent which also seemed familiar, though he couldn't quite place it. To say Peter's call surprised him would be an understatement. He'd just visited with his old friend a couple months ago, and Peter had never asked for his help before. The conversation had been cryptic and Peter refused to tell him anything of consequence until he got there. Jasper was concerned about what he might be walking into, and really hoped it had nothing to do with Maria. He couldn't handle Maria right now.

He heard Peter approaching and slowed down, letting Peter come to meet him. As he took in his friend's emotional state, he relaxed. There was nothing to indicate they were in any danger, though Peter seemed a bit wary.

"So, I'm here." He greeted Peter curtly. The months of emotional distress had taken their toll on the sensitive vampire.

"Thank you for coming so quickly. I need your help."

"That's what you said on the phone."

Peter sighed. He wasn't used to this kind of animosity from Jasper. "I came across a vampire just a little ways to the west. Something isn't right with her, and I could use the backup. I don't think she's fed in a long time and she seems quite weak. Charlotte's bringing something for her, but I wanted you here first in case she regains her strength. Until we know what we're dealing with, it's better if we keep her under control."

"Ok, let's go." Jasper was irritated, but also intrigued. He knew his gift could be handy in this kind of situation and it wasn't as if he actually had a schedule to keep. However, he didn't really want any part of being responsible for another vampire.

"There's something else too, but you'll see when we get there."

Jasper followed Peter further west until they reached the part of the forest where her scent was strongest. The first thing Jasper saw was not the girl on the branch. His eyes were immediately drawn to the trees in the area which had been carved with the images of his lost mate and brother. He stumbled to his knees as his wife's face stared down at him. The details of her delicate features had been captured perfectly in the bark of several trees. There were even more carvings of Edward. He leapt into the nearest tree to get a closer look and his hands shook as he reached out to trace the wooden curves of Alice's cheek.

A whimper caught his attention and his head whipped around, finally seeing the vampire Peter had been talking about. He jumped noiselessly to the ground, but his voice came out strangled.

"Bella?" He stared at her in disbelief. She whimpered again.

Just then he heard Charlotte approaching and she had brought a meal for the girl. A human. It took Jasper a few seconds before he reacted, his head whipping back and forth between Bella and Charlotte.

"No!" He roared, and quickly ran to block Charlotte from coming any closer. "Get the human out of here. She's a Cullen."

Charlotte and Peter shared a look before he dropped his head and asked his wife to take the doomed man and dispose of him. She looked between the three vampires dubiously before turning to take her prize away.

Peter watched Jasper for a moment. He was staring at the girl in the tree with a look of deep concentration on his face. She was staring back, unflinching.

"Edward's Bella?" He asked quietly. Jasper nodded. "I should have known." He muttered. After seeing the carvings in the trees, he should have known she had something to do with the Cullens, but he'd never met the girl before, let alone known that she'd been turned.

"She took off right after Carlisle changed her. That was nine months ago. No one could find a trace of her after the initial trail faded out."

"You mean she's a newborn?" He sputtered.

Jasper nodded gravely.

"But how did she..."

"I know. Amazing." Jasper murmured, his eyes still locked on Bella.

"So, should I go fetch her a deer or something?"

"Yeah. I'll get her down." He moved slowly towards the tree, keeping a read on her as he approached.

Jasper spent a good portion of the past nine months directing his anger towards Bella. It was easy to blame her for being the cause of Alice's death. From the first time Edward exposed himself to the human girl, he'd been leery of her involvement in the family. But, Alice had loved her dearly, so he'd tried to accept her as a member of the family as well. Had he known the chain of events would eventually lead to his wife's destruction, he would have taken Bella's life that night of the accident regardless of Alice's protestations. Recently he had come to a kind of acceptance and understanding over the issue, and most of his rage was now directed at the Volturi. He'd returned to a diet of animal blood and was striving to be the man Alice expected him to be. He realized how disappointed she would be if she could see him now, lost and disheveled - a demon of the night determined to destroy what she died to protect.

Now in some strange twist of fate, Bella was thrust into his life again and she needed him. Had Alice seen all of this before she died?

From her appearance, it was obvious she had not fed in quite some time, if ever. How she had managed to avoid feeding was beyond him, especially when Charlotte brought that human so close. Bella had not even flinched or made a move towards him. He was trying to read her mood, but it was like watching static on television. Every once in a while he would get a flicker, but she was blocking her emotions from him somehow.

She whimpered again as he climbed nearer to her and he tasted the fear coursing through her. He wondered if it was because she was afraid of _him_. She had never seen him through vampire eyes before, and the scars covering his body from his years with Maria warned others of how dangerous he was. Or maybe she thought he blamed her for Alice's death and was going to retaliate. He tried to calm her, but it didn't seem to be working, so he spoke to her in soothing tones.

"Bella, it's Jasper. I know you're frightened, but I'm not going to hurt you. I'm here to help. Come down with me and we'll help you."

He was now on the same branch and he crouched facing her. Slowly, he inched his hand towards her until it rested on her arm. She flinched and suddenly he was bombarded with all the agonizing emotions she'd been blocking from him. He ripped his hand away from her and tried to get himself under control. He could still feel them, but they were muted now that they weren't touching. Once he was able to center himself, he reached out once more for her and this time she visibly relaxed as his gift engulfed her. Jasper slowly moved closer to her and wrapped one arm around her back and put one under her legs. In one fluid jump, he landed on the forest floor with her in his arms. He set her down and she curled into herself once more, hugging her knees to her chest. Upon closer inspection, he could tell she had been injured at some point and unable to heal. Without exposing any more of her body, he inspected the wounds that were visible and found several bites that could only be from another vampire.

"Bella, what happened to you?" He asked her gently, but she didn't reply.

"Why did you run away?" A hundred questions echoed through his mind, but he knew she couldn't, or wouldn't, answer any of them right now.

Peter arrived, dragging an elk through the trees, looking particularly disheveled and perturbed. "Humans are so much easier." He muttered, glaring at Jasper, who stifled a chuckle, despite the serious issues at hand.

"Hey Peter, can Charlotte come help us? I'd like to have as many hands as possible, just in case."

"Sure, let me call her."

Peter gladly handed the elk over to Jasper and flipped open his phone to call his mate. Jasper approached Bella with the flailing beast and knelt before her.

"Bella, you need to feed. Just sink your teeth in here and don't bite too hard, or else you'll lose most of the blood." He held the animal's neck close to Bella's face, but she closed her eyes and stopped breathing. "Why are you refusing? You will feel better once you feed. It's what we do Bella, you know that." The venom was pooling in his own mouth over the meal he held in his hands. It should have been impossible for her to resist, but somehow she was doing it. In frustration, he ripped the fur back that covered the hot pulse point on the elk's neck. Using his razor sharp nail he easily sliced through the muscle and sinew spilling the fresh pulsing blood. He thrust the wound into Bella's face, overwhelming her senses with the rich taste and smell as it poured over her lips.

"Damnit! Drink, Bella! Why are you refusing?" He demanded, using all his concentration to manipulate her into cooperating. He could feel the same emotions coursing through her as when she offered herself to him in their family's living room.

"You won't die." Bella's eyes snapped open and her gaze narrowed on him. He had hit the proverbial nail on the head. "Do you think this is what he wanted for you, Bella? They died to protect you. How do you think they would feel if they could see you now? Fuck! This isn't some twisted version of Romeo and Juliet. They would have wanted us to continue to live our lives. I know that now. I am so lost without Alice, but I know she would want me to move on. Edward would want the same for you." Jasper's voice became tender as he spoke the last few sentences. He knew all too well what she was feeling. They stared at each for a long moment, then finally Bella's lips parted as she latched onto the beast and drank.

Jasper relaxed a bit in relief and watched the muscles in her throat constrict as she swallowed the soothing liquid. "She'll need more." He told Peter, his eyes only briefly flickering up to his friend. Charlotte had joined him and they both stood watching with a look of disgust. "Yeah I know." He shook his head ruefully. The scent and taste of animal blood was repulsive compared to the sweet nectar that was human blood. Nothing compared to the divine flavor and nothing soothed the burn as completely. However, there was a reason for the self-inflicted torture, and he knew Bella would never want to harm a human. He would do whatever he could to spare her the pain and regret that comes with making those kinds of mistakes.

Bella had finished draining the elk and sat gasping as the blood filled her body. She was a mess, but the monster had been awakened in her and the frenzy had taken over. There was only a thin ring of light brown around the outer edges of her pupils, but her wounds were slowly healing.

"Will you hunt with me now?" He asked her, and she agreed with a slight nod, though he could sense her reluctance.

Bella tried to unfold herself from the position she had held for so long. She was weak, and though she could feel her wounds healing, they still ached. Her thoughts were a little more coherent now that the blood had soaked into her immortal body. Jasper was here, and he wasn't angry at her. After all these months, Bella wasn't sure if she would ever see a Cullen again, or if she would even want to. But, Jasper's words had touched on something she'd tried to keep locked away. When Edward took off to Volterra, what else did they expect but for her to play Juliet to his Romeo. _Well I wasn't going to live without you. _She understood his point of view all too well now. _What if something did happen to you? Would you want me to go off myself? _Of course he wouldn't. She remembered the look of pain on his face. Of course he would want her to move on, that's why he left her isn't it? Jasper wanted her to hunt. Would she run again, or could she try to move on?

Jasper took in the sight of her as she stood and couldn't help the guilt that threatened to overwhelm him. He should have been there when she was changed. If not for Bella, then at least for his brother, for Alice. They would have wanted him to take care of her. He could have sensed her emotions and stopped her before she could run off. He was the best tracker in the family and he would have been able to follow her. He could have slowed her down with his gift at least. But no, he had abandoned the family when they needed him. Who knows what she's been through these past nine months, but whatever it was, wasn't pleasant. Being a newborn vampire was difficult enough, but with everything else she had to deal with, on her own no less, he was not too surprised to see her like this. He'd lived in a similar state for a while after losing Alice. As a human, Bella had been so brave and strong, though her body was fragile. Now it was the opposite. She was nearly indestructible, yet her emotional state was quite fragile.

He took her by the elbow and encouraged her to move forward. After a few tentative steps, she picked up the pace and they ran together. Peter and Charlotte trailed behind them. When he sensed a herd of deer in the distance he pulled her to a stop. "Just follow your instincts. I'll be right by your side." She heard the hearts of the deer and took off in that direction. Jasper kept pace beside her, but slowed as she crouched to attack. In a surprisingly graceful leap, she landed on the back of a buck and quickly sank her jaws into it's jugular.

"Next time, snap the neck first. It's less painful for the animal and less messy for you." He suggested from a distance. As soon as the deer was drained, she was up and and chasing after another. This time she snapped the neck first.

Jasper made sure she was sated, and he hovered, afraid she would take off again. He could no longer read her emotions, so he kept his attention trained on her, hoping to notice any twitching muscles in time to stop her. Bella's eyes were now the amber color of an animal drinker, though not as light as he would have liked. As he watched her, he could see her body filling out and her wounds healing. She would need to hunt every day for a while to regain her full strength.

"We're going to go back to Peter's house and get you cleaned up." Her told her, not giving her a choice. Thankfully, she followed.

It had been nine months since Bella had taken a shower, so she took her time and made sure she was completely clean. Charlotte was kind enough to lend her some clothes since she had nothing of her own. Once she was dressed, Jasper insisted on checking on her wounds. He expected her to blush, and it took him a moment to realize she never would again. He felt a pang of sadness about that. Though he had made many vampires, he'd never known one personally before the change. They had all been faceless, nameless victims.

Jasper couldn't help but note the differences in Bella. It was strange to see her familiar face without the brown eyes he was used to. Subtle changes had occurred, as they did with every vampire in order to accentuate their beauty. Her hair was fuller and held more depth of color. Her skin was even paler, lips fuller, cheekbones more prominent. While her scent was still appealing, no trace of her sweet blood lingered. Jasper was relieved at how easy it was to be this close to her without the tortuous burn her blood had invoked.

"Can we talk, Bella?" He asked her once he was satisfied she was healing properly.

She stood awkwardly, her arms wrapped around her middle, unsure of what to do with herself. Jasper noticed her bewildered look, and gestured to the bed. "Why don't you sit down." Bella perched herself on the edge of the bed.

"The family has never stopped looking for you. Where have you been?" He hoped she'd be willing to answer at least. The family had been crumbling since they left Forks, and it had only gotten worse. They had been so distraught over the loss of Alice and Edward, then when Bella took off, everyone just seemed to lose hope. Jasper couldn't stay with them. Their emotions were just too crushing.

"I..." Bella stopped abruptly, bring her hand to her mouth. It was like she was hearing her voice for the first time. Jasper waited patiently. "I don't know." She spoke so softly only vampire ears would be able to hear it.

"What do you mean you don't know?" He pressed.

She seemed to shrink into her self and just shrugged, keeping her eyes on the carpet. When it became obvious she wasn't going to elaborate, he decided to try asking something else.

"What happened to you? Who hurt you?"

As quickly as she could, Bella ran from the room. He called for Peter and Charlotte, but Bella was already on her way through the trees. She was fast, but Jasper easily kept up with her. Then, as suddenly as she had taken off, she stopped. Turning around, she lowered into a crouch and launched herself at Jasper, snarling and growling as she attacked. He had no problems deflecting her advances. After all, he was an expert in training newborns and he knew exactly what to expect from her. She fought purely on instinct. He continued to spar with her, because it seemed like she was trying _not_ to hurt him, merely provoke him. He didn't want to hurt her either. Jasper thought she might be trying to vent some aggression and humored her for a while. Peter and Charlotte stood by, ready to intervene, but he had told them to stay out of it. While she had him pinned for a brief moment she growled out the words that explained everything.

"_Take your revenge Jasper. You know I killed her."_

Then she sank her teeth into his shoulder and ripped out a chunk of his marble flesh. The sting of her venom pulsed through him. It had been a long time since he'd felt that. Bella got her desired result as Jasper reacted instinctively, fury welling up as he threw her into a tree and pinned her to it before she could gather herself enough to dodge or attack again. He grabbed a fistful of hair and yanked her head to the side, baring her throat.

"Is that what you really want, Bella?" He sneered as he looked her in the eye. Her emotions came flooding out then, as she must have stopped blocking him. Bella was resigned to her fate.


	6. Chapter 6

He would never hurt her, of course, but Jasper's stunt caused Bella to let go of whatever was blocking him and he blasted her with the strongest cocktail of crippling emotions he could muster.

"Charlotte." He called pleadingly.

"No, Jasper. You know better than to ask." Peter protested, knowing exactly what his old friend wanted.

"I just need her to stop Bella from running. She can undo it later. You know as well as I do what kind of trouble it could mean if she continues to run. We can't lose her too."

"Peter, it's ok. I'll do it." Charlotte agreed quietly. Only the two vampires in front of her knew of her gift. Once they had figured out what she was capable of, they made sure to keep it between the three of them. A gift like hers would be exploited, especially by someone like Maria.

"Thanks, Char. I owe you. Quickly, before she can block you."

The tiny blond vampire approached Bella and rested her hands on her shoulders, looking her in the eye. "Stop running, Bella. There are people who care about you and need you. Stop running from them." She murmured in a low voice. When she was satisfied that Bella had been convinced, she stepped away and hung her head. Peter had moved to embrace her, glowering at Jasper.

"I'm sorry. I've never asked before, and you know I wouldn't unless there was no other way."

"I know. It's for the best. I just don't like taking away someone's free will." Charlotte gave him a reassuring smile.

Bella sat at the base of the tree Jasper had pinned her to. Vampires couldn't sleep, but the artificial emotions from the empath caused her limbs to feel weak and heavy. She looked up blankly at the trio wondering what would happen next.

Jasper knelt by her side, holding his hand over the wound on his shoulder. Bella immediately felt guilty for causing him pain. His granite skin was quickly knitting itself together again, fusing the pieces right before her eyes. "I'm not going to hurt you, Bella, so stop trying to push me. It's time to move on and embrace that this is what you are now. You have to find a way to exist. Find something to continue on for."

"How did you do it?" Bella whispered. The urge to flee had dissipated and she was filled with an unnatural calm, courtesy of Jasper. She was left feeling completely spent and helpless, whereas a few moments ago a savage ferocity had coursed through her. She was bewildered by her rapidly changing emotions. For so long, she'd been lost in the pain and sorrow.

"I did it for her. Alice would never have wanted me to waste my existence wallowing in misery. The same goes for you, Bella. They fought to protect you. They could have walked away and let the Volturi do whatever they wanted with you, but they didn't. They wanted you to live and you're disgracing their memory with the way you're behaving."

Bella flinched from Jasper's harsh words, but it was what she needed to hear. She had always been so selfless, putting others before herself. It made perfect sense that she couldn't handle the guilt of surviving while two of her loved ones had lost their lives. But enough was enough. It was one thing to mourn Edward and Alice, but it was something entirely different to be self-destructive. He had to convince her to try to move on because of Edward and Alice. The poor girl had lost everything – her mate, her best friend, her father, her mother, her friends, and her human life. Bella needed something to live for, but all she had at the moment was the memory of the two who gave their lives for her. So he used it against her.

He could feel her shock at his words and then it melted into anger before she was blocking him again. "Now, let's go back to the house and finish our discussion from earlier." Jasper commanded firmly. Bella actually obeyed, albeit petulantly, her arms folded tightly across her chest in ire. Jasper suppressed a chuckle as she stormed off for the house. He wasn't sure why he found it amusing, but she reminded him of an angry kitten. It was hard for him to reconcile that this Bella was not the same fragile, lovestruck girl from Forks that he had known. Now she was a bloodthirsty killer, just as sure as he was.

For the second time that day, Bella showered and dressed in yet another set of clothes Charlotte had set out for her. When Jasper saw her in the ill-fitting sweats and t-shirt, he flicked his credit card at Charlotte and asked her to buy some clothes and shoes for Bella. That earned him a murderous glare from the feisty newborn, and he smirked, remembering her distaste for people spending money on her.

"Do you prefer wearing hand me downs?" He question was laced with sarcasm. "Charlotte will run out of clothes at the rate you're going."

"I can take care of myself." Bella insisted.

Jasper scoffed. "Really? You've been doing such a fabulous job of it so far."

Peter and Charlotte both grimaced as Bella's eyes flashed with rage. Jasper should have known better than to provoke a newborn, especially by implying a woman can't take care of herself. Peter learned that lesson decades ago. A few months of sleeping on the couch and he never made that mistake with Charlotte again.

"I don't need you." She spat.

Jasper opened his mouth, ready to lob another retort, when suddenly he found himself flying through the air. He crashed through the wall of the living room where Bella was still standing, seething. There was some kind of orb shimmering around her. As her black irises slowly refilled with amber, shock registered on her face. The orb quickly dissipated and she rushed to Jasper's side. The three vampires stared at her in awe and trepidation.

"I'm so sorry...so sorry. Are you ok?" Bella asked, the words buzzing quickly from her lips.

"What the fuck was that?" Jasper yelled, backing away from her. In all his years of training vampires, he'd never come across a gift like that.

"I don't know." Bella sobbed. "I'm sorry."

"She must be some kind of shield." Peter spoke quietly, not wanting to risk upsetting her again. "Is this the first time that has happened, Bella?"

She shook her head, biting her lip and looking down so her hair covered her face. A human gesture Jasper remembered well. The only thing missing was the blush.

"I think you have some explaining to do." Jasper didn't like being taken by surprise and if he was honest, an untrained newborn with such a strong gift made him nervous. Even more so when he couldn't read or affect her emotions half the time.

Bella looked frightened. Jasper could be quite an intimidating vampire when he wanted to be. There was a reason he survived so long as Maria's favorite. Each scar on his body was a reminder of all the vampires who tried to kill him, and failed.

"Jasper, she's young. She doesn't know what she's doing. You're scaring her." Peter murmured to his old friend, who nodded curtly in acknowledgement. Jasper knew that, but he needed to know what he was dealing with.

"I understand that, Peter, but we were responsible for her and it's been nine months since anyone has seen her. Thank goodness the Volturi have been preoccupied, otherwise our family could have been held accountable. I think we deserve some answers." He didn't take his eyes off of Bella because he knew this was something else he could use against her. Jasper always hated manipulating others, but it was for her own good, as well as for his former family. He really couldn't blame her too much as he had also been avoiding the Cullens as much as possible since losing Alice.

"I'll tell you whatever you want to know." Bella whispered, defeated, yet relieved to have someone to talk to after all this time. She sat on the couch in the living room, and the others followed.

Jasper sat on the coffee table, directly in front of her. "Where have you been?"

"I don't know."

"Bella..." He growled in frustration.

"What? I don't know. I ran until I was sure I had lost them, and then I stopped. I've been in those trees ever since. Where are we?"

"Montana. Near the Wyoming border." Peter answered.

"Why did you stay here?"

"Where else did I have to go? I knew I had to stay away from humans, and your family were the only vampires I knew. It's not like there's a vampire directory or something! It's not like I could have gone home!" Bella's face scrunched up as if she was crying, but she couldn't produce tears any longer.

"Why did you leave, though?" Jasper spoke quieter now, trying to understand.

"Your family didn't want me."

"What do you mean?"

"I was never good enough for him, or for any of you. I always knew that. I knew one day he would grow tired of me and leave. You _all_ just picked up and left. I knew then that I didn't mean anything to your family. Then you lost them both because of me. Of course you didn't want me to stay! I was nothing but a burden. So I made it easy on everyone and left. If I stayed, I'd just be a reminder of everything you lost."

"What are you talking about, Bella? Edward never grew tired of you. He left to protect you. Not a single one of us wanted to leave Forks. Edward insisted it was best for you if we made a clean break. We were only doing what he asked. He was our brother. They never blamed you, Bella, and they've never given up trying to find you." Jasper ran his hands through his hair, wondering how everything got so screwed up. "How could you ever think we didn't want you?"

"What else was I supposed to think, Jasper? Your entire family picked up and left without any warning. Edward told me he didn't want me anymore. That I wasn't good for him. That I didn't belong in his world. Sure, Alice came back, but only because she thought I was dead. None of you came for me in Italy until Aro called Carlisle. The only reason I came home with him is because he was ordered to change me. I wasn't going to stick around when I was unwanted."

Jasper gasped. "Bella, you have it all wrong. God, we were so wrong." He dropped his head into his hands. "Whatever Edward told you that day was a lie. He wanted you to move on and live a normal, human life. He felt our world was too dangerous for you. It's all my fault. If I hadn't...he would never have had a reason to leave."

Bella spoke softly. "Jasper, it's not your fault. He would have found a reason to leave eventually. He wanted to leave me after Phoenix and I begged him not to. He never intended to change me and would have moved on after a couple of years anyway. He told me that he didn't want to pretend any longer. Don't blame yourself. I knew it would happen eventually. I was just a distraction." She shook her head, feeling stupid for believing they'd ever had a chance at a future together.

"You can't believe that, Bella. You were the most important thing to him ever. You were important to us too. We all left because he thought we were too dangerous to you. It broke him to leave you. You have no idea how awful it was for the entire family. No one was the same. Alice was inconsolable. I've never seen her so depressed. We all were so sure he'd come to his senses and go back to you. When he thought you were dead he ran off to Italy because he didn't want to live without you. I don't understand how you can think for one minute that he didn't love you. He died for you!"

"It doesn't make sense." She murmured.

"Because you're believing a lie!" Jasper stood up and paced the room. He suddenly stopped and pulled out his phone, dialing Carlisle.

"_Jasper?"_

"I've found her."

"_Oh thank God. Is she ok?"_

"She will be."

"_Where was she?"_

"Actually Peter found her near his property in Montana. He didn't know who it was, but called me to help."

"_Do you know why she left?"_

"Carlisle, did you ever tell her you wanted her to stay?"

"_Uh...I don't think so. We just...well...we thought she knew. Are you telling me she left because she thought we didn't want her to stay?_

"Think about it, Carlisle. We left Forks without saying goodbye, and Edward tells her he doesn't want her. The next time she sees you is in Volterra, and you only came after Aro called."

"_Oh God. We never talked about it. I just assumed she knew..."_

"We were all lost in our own grief, Carlisle. Looking at it from her side, it's easy to understand why she ran."

"_Will you bring her home?"_

Bella shook her head. "Um, not yet Carlisle. When she's ready, I will."

Carlisle's voice dropped. _"Oh, ok. What has she been doing? She hasn't..."_

"No, no. I actually took her for her first hunt. She's pretty much stayed holed up in the forest here since she left."

He sucked in a sharp breath and was silent for a while.

"_Dear God. How? The poor girl..._" Carlisle's voice was barely a whisper through the receiver.

"I know." Jasper replied, barely audible to the vampires in the room. "Well, Carlisle, I just wanted to let you know she's safe."

"_We never gave up hope that we'd find her. Anytime she wants to come home, she's welcome. Tell her we miss her and give her our love, Jasper."_

"You know I will."

"_Do you think we could come visit?"_

"I'm not sure that's such a great idea right now, Carlisle. Give her some time."

"_Oh, ok. Take care of her, son. And take care of yourself. We miss you too."_

"I know and I will."

"_Bye._"

Jasper flipped the phone shut and sat back down in front of Bella. "So you heard all of that?"

Bella nodded, biting her lip. Then she stood and made her way out of the house. Jasper followed her, but she let out a soft growl. "I'm not running. I just want to be alone."

"We don't have to talk, but I'm still coming with you." He insisted.

Jasper couldn't believe what a mess everything had turned out to be. Now that he had an idea of at least part of the story from Bella's point of view, he could see why she felt the way she did. Bella had always felt inferior to the members his family. She loved Edward and the rest of the family dearly, and in her mind, her future was with them. Then one day out of the blue, Edward is telling her he doesn't want her and the whole family just abandons her without so much as a goodbye. Of course she would be crushed. It was just confirmation of everything she'd always thought – that she wasn't good enough. She gave everything she had to his family and they left her like she was nothing more than a piece of gum on the bottom of one of Rosalie's Manolo's.

She risked everything to fly halfway across the world to save Edward in a city full of dangerous vampires. Who knows what horrors she had to endure while a prisoner of the Volturi. Not a single one of them came to her rescue. Only Carlisle went when Aro called. Of course she would feel abandoned. No one thought to assure her of her place in the family. The fragile human girl who had always felt unworthy, was never given a reason to believe otherwise. No wonder she ran. It was Bella's nature to be selfless and she hated to be a burden to anyone. She truly believed the family didn't want her around and in an effort to make it easier for them, she just left. She left and sequestered herself to a cluster of trees for an indeterminate amount of time, never feeding and never having any companionship. Acclimating to life as a vampire is difficult enough as it is, with the mood swings and thirst and overwhelming sensations. To do so on her own, especially after such a traumatic chain of events, was a testament to Bella's strength. He found himself oddly proud of the girl for persevering as well as she had.

When Bella stopped, he saw they were back in that same copse of carved trees. She lithely leapt into the branches of one of them and settled herself on a branch below an image of Edward. Jasper quickly looked around and found an exceptional likeness of Alice in another tree. He lounged on a branch and drank in the sight of his lost love. Both vampires lost in their own memories.

Jasper ended up breaking the silence, despite the fact he told her they didn't have to talk. He found he _wanted_ to talk to her. He wanted to know what had happened during the time she was missing. With everything that had happened, Jasper felt a type of kinship with the girl.

"You did these?" He gestured to the carvings.

She nodded. "I was lonely. It wasn't supposed to be this way. We were supposed to have this life together. I don't want forever without him." Bella confessed.

"The details are amazing. It feels like she's right there watching me." He breathed. "You don't know my story, do you?"

Bella shook her head. "No. Edward respected everyone's privacy, He said it was your story to tell."

"I don't want to get into a lot of detail right now, but I didn't have the best start. I was a Major in the Confederate army. It was during that time when I was _recruited_ by a vampire named Maria. She found me compelling and wanted me for her own army, so she changed me. For nearly a hundred years I helped her build armies of newborn vampires. I trained them, led them into battle, and when their strength waned after the first year, or when they were no longer useful, I destroyed them. I was a favorite, and was rewarded often with human blood, which kept me stronger. It was a brutal life, full of war and death. We fought for territory against other newborn armies. All these scars you see on my body are from vampires I fought. _Thousands._ I've killed so many humans and vampires that I lost count."

He paused, somehow finding a bit of comfort in the wooden eyes of his mate's image. "As an empath, you can imagine how hard it must have been for me to constantly be surrounded by the emotions always present in that kind of environment. I grew depressed, but I knew no other way of life. This was what she changed me for. Eventually, Peter and I became friends. One day when it was time to weed out the newborns who had passed their prime, Charlotte was brought before us. He yelled at her to run, and then followed her. I let them go. He loved her, and they deserved a chance. Five years later, they returned the favor. Peter came back for me and told me there were other options. In the time they'd been away they'd never had to fight. Things were different in the north and our kind were able to co-exist. That one conversation was enough to convince me to leave all I had known for nearly a century. I walked away without a second glance and spent years traveling with Peter and Charlotte, getting used to this new, more peaceful world. I still got depressed though. Peter eventually figured out that it was always worse after I fed. I could feel everything my prey was feeling and I lived their emotions when I killed them."

Jasper was lost in the story, reliving his past as he explained everything to Bella. She hadn't said a word, but was listening with rapt attention.

"It was all just too much and I continued to get worse. I left Peter and Charlotte and wandered on my own for years. They didn't feel the same aversion as I did. They only wanted an escape from the fighting. I did try to kill less often, but after a century of instant gratification, self-discipline was challenging."

He smiled then.

"It was a rainy day in Philadelphia, and I realized I should head indoors in order to keep my cover. Standing outside in the pouring rain was far from inconspicuous. I ducked into a little diner and there she was – expecting me, naturally. She hopped down off the stool as soon as I walked in and came over to me. I wasn't sure how to react. Given my past, I tensed for an attack, but she was smiling. The emotions that were emanating from her were nothing I'd ever felt before. '_You've kept me waiting a long time.' _She said. Then she held out her hand, and I took it, not knowing what I was doing. For the first time in a century, I felt hope. She told me what she had seen of Carlisle and his family. I couldn't believe such an existence was possible. Alice made me optimistic, so we went to find them. As they say, the rest was history. I've never been happier."

Bella couldn't help but smile either, and Jasper was secretly pleased he had elicited some kind of positive response from her.

"So, you see, as bleak as this existence may seem to you right now, there is always the possibility of great things in the future. If you give up now, you might never know what could have been. I know he was your whole world, just as Alice was mine, but we can press on and live the next chapter of our lives. I lived nearly a hundred years in misery, but in the end I found the greatest treasure of all. I'll admit that for a couple months after losing Alice, I lost faith that I could go on without her. But it was because of her, that I knew I had to shake myself out of that hole and live again. I have to be ready for my next big adventure in this life, whatever it may be. There is so much we can do. Think about what you want, Bella. Live on and accomplish something, help people, travel the world, whatever it takes to keep you moving forward. Our family will always be there for you. You are not alone."


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. The entire family was sick with the flu.**

* * *

He heard the soft padding of her feet through the forest as she followed him out to hunt. Jasper scented a herd of elk and headed off in that direction. There would be enough for both of them. As he neared the herd, the muscles in his body tensed for the attack and he gave himself over to the hunt.

She sensed the shift in Jasper and took to the trees to watch. This was a side of the Cullens she had never been able to witness as a human. Bella found herself mesmerized by the fluid grace and raw animalistic power, so much that it overrode her own meager blood lust. Jasper had made her hunt every day for the past week, and in truth, the thought of hunting again today made her queasy, as the remnants of yesterday's meal still sloshed in her stomach.

Clad in only an old pair of jeans, the sun glinted through the trees and Jasper's skin threw muted prisms over the surrounding foliage. She had seen Edward in the sunlight. The memory had been branded into her brain when she woke, but the sight through vampire-enhanced vision was so much more glorious. It was hard to tear her eyes away from the spectacle, and she was embarrassed that she had been staring at his naked torso so blatantly. She knew he was uncomfortable with the many scars that littered his body, but the sight was impressive and always captured her attention.

In a matter of minutes, Jasper had finished off two of the elk. His entire body visibly relaxed as the blood coursed through his immortal anatomy. He felt her embarrassment when he stood to wipe the blood from his face, and knew she had been watching again. Trying to spare her feelings, he quickly took care of the carcasses without acknowledging her presence. Newborns were overly-curious, so he tried not to be annoyed that she had been watching him so intently over the past week. He really shouldn't have minded, but there was something _more_ there that made him uneasy. It reminded him of how Alice would watch him hunt and the memories of the activities they shared afterward flooded his mind. He settled himself against a tree as the familiar pain flared within his empty chest and turned his attention to Bella.

She had leapt into the next tree and extended her bare arm into a shaft of sunlight, refocusing her attention on her own skin. She lightly traced her fingers over the skin of her wrist where James had bitten her. There was no longer a silvery crescent-shaped scar there and Bella mourned the loss of it. It had been proof that _he_ was real. Jasper watched, knowing she was remembering her loss as well. They made a perfect pair, both wallowing in their misfortunes, and he knew they would both be dragged under by their grief if he didn't do something to refocus their attention.

"Bella! Go hunt!" He shouted, effectively tearing her from her reverie. He sensed her reluctance and commiserated silently. He was glutted from too much hunting and after today he would lay off the hunting trips. She had healed completely and her eyes were a bright gold. Her form had filled out and her emotional state had been more stable the past few days. Bella was still a newborn, and it would still take some time for her to gain her bearings, especially after going to so long without hunting or any contact. He still wanted to know who had attacked her, and he was tired of waiting for her to broach the subject herself.

She knew he would not let her go without hunting, so she jumped from the tree, landing gracefully with the barest whisper of impact. The reality of her as a vampire still surprised him. He couldn't help the involuntary urge to catch her when he saw her falling through the air and he flinched when she landed, anticipating an injury from the crash. The protective feelings he had for the once human girl would take a while to fade. The image of her body, broken and bloody, on the floor of the ballet studio would forever remain etched into his mind. How she bravely faced down one of his kind was admirable. Humans just don't survive vampire attacks, especially once they've been bitten. The whole thing was still so surreal.

Bella loped off through the woods with Jasper close on her heels. They scented the cat at the same time, and he watched as her body instinctively reacted to the hunt. Her muscles tensed as she pursued her prey, and her attention zeroed in on the warm pulsing blood. Once she visually sighted the object of her hunt, she stopped abruptly. The large, tawny mountain lion froze as he evaluated the new threat in front of him. All his instincts screamed that she was a predator, and it was either fight or flight, but the two pairs of golden eyes remained locked on each other, and the cat chuffed at the motionless girl. Jasper fought back the irrational urge to protect Bella from the dangerous predator, knowing that she was perfectly capable of defending herself against it, so he remained in the shadows.

Bella could not bring herself to attack the mountain lion. All she could think about was _him._ This had been _his_ favorite. Had he not referred to himself once as a lion, in love with the lamb? Everything about this creature before her reminded her of _him_ - flashing amber eyes, leonine grace, and gleaming teeth. Feeling the searing pain in her chest that had never healed, she turned from the stoic animal and took off into the woods. She vowed she would never take the life of one of those beautiful cats as a tribute to _him_.

Would it ever get easier? Over the past week, Bella had started to feel alive again. For once, she had hope that maybe her future wouldn't always be so miserable. Then one encounter with a wild animal and the walls feel like they're crumbling down around her again. Only maybe she didn't feel like she buried so deep this time. Maybe it would be easier to find the surface now. Jasper's presence made a difference, and not because of his gift. If he could start to heal from the grief of losing Alice, maybe there was hope for her as well. Bella felt like she could talk to Jasper, when she was able to actually talk about it without feeling like she would shatter into a million pieces. He was probably the only person who knew what she was going through. All those months she was alone, she longed for Jake. She knew he would listen and he would be her rock, her safe harbor. But she couldn't see him now. She was his enemy. Losing Jake and her family on top of everything else was too much to bear. Bella had been suffocated by how completely and utterly alone she was. Now, with Jasper here, she felt a little lighter.

She knew he would find her, so Bella wasn't surprised when she felt the branch dip with his weight.

"I...I can't." She began, trying to calm her sobbing. Bella didn't realize how much she would miss being able to cry. "It was his favorite." She whispered, knowing Jasper would understand.

"I'll never hunt another fox either." He whispered back, leaning in to bump her shoulder with his – a simple symbol of understanding and solidarity. "Not that I ever hunted them in the first place. They don't make a very satisfying meal. Alice thought they were sweet, maybe similar to what dessert might be like for a human." Jasper tried to lighten the mood.

"What's your favorite?" She asked him.

"Tiger, or any of the large cats, really. They all taste the same." He paused for a moment, deciding whether to continue. "Some of my best memories of Edward include hunting together in Africa. We'd race each other to see who could catch a cheetah first. There is always plenty of good hunting in Africa...maybe you'd like to go one day?"

She shrugged. "Maybe."

They were quiet for a while. Jasper sensed that Bella was trying to compose herself after an emotional afternoon. Whenever she was upset, it was more difficult, if not impossible, to read her emotions. He could tell when she was calming down because he could _feel_ her again.

"Who did you fight with, Bella?" Jasper asked once again, hoping for an answer this time. He didn't like pushing her, but he also didn't like being in the dark about any possible threats.

The walls were going back up, and she shook her head dismissively. He bit back his frustration at her reluctance. Just as he was about to leave, she spoke.

"You know I'm a magnet for trouble." She began, letting out a dark chuckle. "Victoria found me."

Jasper hissed, his eyes growing black with the memory of the trio of nomads. It had been a long time since he'd destroyed another vampire, and ripping James apart had been cathartic. He should have been ashamed to admit that, but after what that bastard had done to Bella, he deserved it. There was absolutely no excuse for torturing a human being for sport.

Bella nodded at his reaction and continued. "She wanted revenge for James' death. A mate for a mate. Laurent came back to Forks first. He found me in our meadow and told me about Victoria. She had sent him to Forks to find me and scout out the situation for her. Only, he was _thirsty_..." She shuddered. "If it wasn't for the wolves, he would have drained me. They destroyed him."

"The protectors." He murmured.

"Yes, they protected me after you all left." Her eyes flashed black with anger.

"Bella, if we had known you'd be in danger, we never would have left." Bella held up her hand, silencing him. As much as she didn't want to, her brain automatically filled in the blanks. _Alice should have seen._ But she couldn't say it, and even thinking it pained her. She didn't blame Alice, she couldn't. Her gift wasn't perfect, and _he_ had ordered her not to look for Bella. No one knew they'd come back for her. No one knew Alice couldn't see the wolves.

"I guess after Laurent didn't come back, Victoria decided to take matters into her own hands. She came to Forks looking for me. The pack had a hard time catching her. They would always pick up her trail, but never got close enough to actually destroy her. She was there in the water the day I jumped. Once again, they kept me safe."

"You know, Edward tracked her. He wanted nothing more than to keep you safe. He lost her trail once he got to Texas, and followed a false lead to Brazil. That's where he was when..." The series of unfortunate events that came after that hurt both of them too much to mention. Except that she needed to know. "He was planning on coming back to you, Bella. He'd given up trying to stay away. He was days away from coming back."

Jasper felt her shock, and then her heart shattered all over again and the guilt consumed her. Before she could get too worked up, he tried to calm her. She felt it and shot him a halfhearted glare.

"If I had just waited for Jake, none of this would have happened. Do you see now, why I am to blame?" She ground out.

"Bella..." He began.

"Fine. I'll drop it. Do you want to hear the rest?" He nodded.

"Of course it was just my luck that Victoria would be passing through these woods. She caught my scent and came to investigate. I smelled different, but she knew it was me as soon as she saw me..."

"_Well, well, well. If it isn't Edward's little human. I've been looking for you. I never imagined I'd find you like this. Not so fragile anymore are you? Too bad they left you unprotected. Newborns are easy to destroy, if you know how."_

_She threw Bella to the ground, leaving a deep impression from the impact._

_Standing over Bella's weak form, she sneered, spitting venom as she spoke. "Seems we have a score to settle. You cost me both James and Laurent. All that fuss over a lowly human. I'll never understand it."_

_Victoria attacked and sank her teeth into Bella's shoulder, pulling her arm behind her back. Bella hissed in pain and thought she was about to lose her arm, but Victoria stopped. Bella refused to fight back. She welcomed the idea of death. Victoria took her time torturing Bella. She threw her into trees and boulders, and sank her teeth into her granite flesh any chance she got. The venom stung and Bella was in pain, but she was waiting for Victoria to tear her to pieces. She wanted to be freed from the immortal body that kept her tethered to this miserable existence. _

"_Why aren't you fighting back?" The red haired demon whined._

"_He's gone Victoria. The Volturi destroyed him. I don't care what you do to me." Bella confessed._

_Victoria stopped her attack and stepped back, understanding evident in her expression. She cocked her head to the side, considering the new information. "Well then, I guess my job is done. Now you'll know what it's like to suffer eternity without your mate."_

_She turned to leave, and Bella grew desperate. "Finish what you started, bitch!" Bella stood up, and gathered what strength she could in order to try to provoke the other vampire. With everything she had left, she launched herself at Victoria and ripped a chunk out of her arm. Victoria turned on her and with renewed rage, she was indeed determined to finish what she started. The redhead launched herself, hissing and growling towards the small newborn vampire, but quickly found herself hurtling through the air in the opposite direction. A loud crack and flash of white light knocked her senseless before she could comprehend what was happening._

"So that was the first time you used your power?" Jasper asked interrupting her.

Bella nodded. "I didn't even know what happened. One moment she was about to attack me, and the next thing I knew she was laying on the ground two hundred feet away. Once she regained her senses, she ran off. I didn't follow her. I was trying to figure out what I had done."

"From what you've told me, it seems the strength of your shield is related to your emotional state. The more agitated you are, the stronger it is. When Victoria was going to attack you, your shield must have protected you subconsciously."

"And I was angry with you when it happened last time..." Bella was starting to put the pieces together and the reality scared her. She didn't like feeling out of control and between the instability of being a newborn and a gift that reacted to her emotional state, she felt just that. A leaf fluttered towards the ground and captured her attention. As it passed through patches of sunlight, the thin membrane was illuminated and she could see the tiny shimmering bodies of the mites that lined the underside near the veins.

"How can I learn to control it Jasper? I don't want to hurt anyone." She asked earnestly.

"I'm not sure, but Peter and I can try and help you explore it. Carlisle would know more..." He trailed off, his eyebrows raised in silent question.

Her eyes narrowed, knowing what he was thinking and she wasn't ready for it. She couldn't face the family yet, especially knowing now how much more trouble she had caused them by running off. Bella still wasn't convinced they wanted her as a part of the family. Why would they want her around when she was the cause of everything bad that had happened to them?

"You still don't believe me, do you?" Jasper asked. "They really do miss you and they want to see you. Esme called two days ago begging me to let them come visit. I'm not sure I can guarantee they won't just show up. Carlisle and Esme have always considered you a daughter. I've never seen Rose so concerned over anyone but herself, but she's been calling and asking to speak with you. Emmett is threatening to come down here and take you home by force. He misses his little sister. This has all been very hard on them, and having you reject them makes it even harder."

He felt her surge of anger. "Why are you angry?"

"They rejected me first." She stated, turning her attention to the tree and beginning to scratch away the bark with her fingernail.

"Are we just going to continue going around in circles about this, Isabella?" Her head snapped up at his tone and the use of her full name. Jasper was angry with her. Bella could feel the emotion slam into her and she actually shuddered a little in fear. His eyes were black and the scars covering his body stood out more now than they had glittering in the sunlight, warning her of how dangerous he could be. She could feel a tugging at her mind and wondered if it could be her shield trying to protect her.

Confident that he wouldn't hurt her, she glared back at him indignantly. "What right do you have to be angry with _me_, Jasper?"

"You just don't get it. I've never lied to you, Bella, but you still don't believe me. You need to get over yourself and think about what you are doing to the rest of the family. They lost Edward and Alice, and then you. Now that they know you are safe, you are refusing to even speak to them. Do you have any idea how much that hurts them?"

"Yeah, actually I do. Maybe they should have a taste of their own medicine." She snarled.

"I never thought you could be so selfish and immature."

Bella gaped at his accusation. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You've always been so selfless and caring, but now, you're being selfish and immature. You're doing exactly what Edward did. He decided you were better off without us, so he left. He gave no consideration to what you wanted, and it was horrible wasn't it?" Bella wrapped her arms around herself at the memory of the pain he'd caused. "Now you think our family is better off without you, so you're just going to make that decision for them and stay away after they've already lost so much. You're just going to add to that hurt. That's not like you, Bella. The Bella I knew and respected cared about others' feelings."

Bella had taken refuge on the ground, her tiny fists balled up as her shield pulsed around her. "You have no right, Jasper! No right at all to put this on me! They were the ones who left me first. What do you want me to do? Go back and see the pain I caused etched on their faces for the rest of eternity? Do you not understand how much more painful all of this would be for me if I had to do that? I'm not strong enough to go through that. It's hard enough being alone with my memories. Seeing everyone else's pain would be too much. You know that. You left too because you couldn't stand it!"

"Yeah, well it's time to go back." Jasper replied sullenly. She was right. He had run away just as she had. Though they expected it from him, it probably had hurt them just as much as her disappearance. They still worried about him and cared for him as a son and brother. "We can help each other heal." He murmured, looking off into the trees at one of her carvings of Alice. She led him to a new life with the Cullens and it was where he belonged.

"I'm going back to the house." Bella whispered, and took off through the trees. Jasper decided to give her some space and went to sit by the river. The sound of the water rushing over the rocks and lack of invading emotions was a soothing balm to his tortured soul. It hurt him to cause her pain and he hated manipulating her, but they both needed to go home. He rested on the rocks, closed his eyes and remembered the beautiful years he'd spent with Alice.

Bella ran back to the house finding Charlotte in the living room wearing only a bikini.

"Hey little one." She greeted her with a warm smile and a hug. "You look like you could do with some relaxation. Why don't you join us in the hot tub?"

"Oh I don't know." Bella mumbled, not wanting to intrude on the couple. "I'm sure you two would like some time alone, and besides, I don't have a suit."

"Nonsense. We'd love for you to join us." She grabbed Bella by the hand and pulled her into her room. "I have a suit you can use." Charlotte pulled out a blue bikini and pressed it into her hands. "Go and change and meet us out back."

Bella stared at the scraps of fabric in her hands and knew she would be blushing if she could. Charlotte laughed. "Don't be embarrassed, little one. You're stunning and that is going to look amazing on you." She left the room, closing the door behind her.

Bella quickly stripped off her dirty hunting clothes and put on the bikini, noting that it was more revealing than most of her underwear. When she saw herself in the mirror, she had to admit that her new body did fill out the suit nicely, but the crescent shaped scars from Victoria that now marred her skin distracted her. She idly traced them with her finger and couldn't help but feel sad and a bit angry that they would be there for eternity. Bella jumped when a pair of arms wrapped around her. She hadn't realized Charlotte had come back into the room.

The little blond vampire laid her head gently on Bella's shoulder, her fingers tracing the same scars. "Don't be sad, Bella, you are still beautiful. These are just a reminder of what you've been through." Charlotte stepped out from behind Bella and took her hand, running Bella's fingers over her own scars. "I have them too. It's a part of this life, unfortunately, and they only serve to make us stronger. You've seen Jasper and Peter. Do you think they are any less handsome because of their scars?"

Bella shook her head no and Charlotte laughed lightly. "Exactly. No one who sees these on you, will ever think less of you." She pulled Bella out of the bedroom. "Come on now, Peter has been waiting rather impatiently for us." She winked, then turned to lead Bella to the hot tub.

Peter was lounging in the hot tub, and he was clearly enjoying the frothing water. What she could see of him was sculpted perfection, just like every other male vampire she'd seen shirtless. His hair was almost the same white-blond color as Charlotte's, and it fanned out behind him over the edge of the tub. Bella heard Charlotte's tinkering laugh, and then saw that Peter had caught her ogling him. His burgundy eyes captured her own, and she ducked her head in embarrassment.

"Don't be embarrassed, little one." Charlotte whispered as she gently prodded Bella towards the tub. "He is quite the treat to look at."

Bella peeked up at Peter again and saw his eyes roaming over her very exposed body. He flashed her a predatory smile. "So are you two. Come and join me." Peter gestured for them to sit on either side of him. Bella was nervous about sitting so close to him considering how little clothing they were all wearing, but he had been nothing but welcoming and she didn't want to be rude. She sat down beside him and he quickly wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him. He did the same with Charlotte. "My beautiful girls." He sighed, with a smile. Charlotte peered over at Bella and winked before settling her head on his shoulder. Bella did the same and found herself relaxing into him as the hot water bubbled and swirled around her. She hadn't felt this good since...well, since before _he_ left. Peter's arm was a cool contrast to the water, but he did absorb some of the heat and was almost warm. His fingers started lightly tracing up and down her side and she stiffened at the intimate gesture. His wife was sitting on the other side of him and it made her very uncomfortable. Just as she was about to move away, Charlotte spoke up.

"Relax, Bella. You've had too much pain and sorrow, let him make you feel good." She reached across her husband and lightly stroked Bella's cheek.

"But.." Bella started to protest.

"But he's my mate?" Charlotte responded with a smirk. "Yes he is, and he always will be. You'll find that this life is a long one and sometimes you need to experience new things. It doesn't bother me, and we both want to give you this."

"Oh...I...um..." Bella stammered, her hair falling forward to cover her face. She didn't know how to respond. Peter's fingers were still trailing up and down her side and hip and it felt so nice, but it was wrong too. She'd never done more than kiss before, and the thought of Charlotte...

Charlotte giggled again, realizing what Bella must have surmised from her last words. "Don't worry, I won't touch you. Unless you want me to?"

Bella's eyes widened. "Um..no offense..."

"None taken. Just relax, and Peter will take care of you." She spoke earnestly and leaned over her husband to quickly plant a chaste kiss on Bella's cheek, then one on Peter's lips.

"Come here, little one. I won't hurt you." Peter whispered into her ear, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin and causing her to shiver. She could feel his lips turn up against her neck. He had pulled her closer so her back was pressed tightly against his side and his hand started caressing the taught skin of her stomach. His finger circled lightly around her belly button, dipping inside every so often.

"You are so beautiful, and I hate seeing you so sad." He began to kiss lightly along the exposed column of her neck and down across her shoulder. Bella couldn't help the way her body reacted to him. Her nipples hardened and a warmth spread through her. Still, she could not help but feel like she was betraying _him_ and started to pull away, but Peter lightly skimmed his teeth along her neck and a moan escaped her.

"Just forget it all for a little while. There's nothing wrong with us enjoying ourselves a little. It's been so long since anyone has given you any comfort, hasn't it?" Bella nodded slightly, her head rubbing against his chest. His skin was so smooth, like silk. Her sense of touch was so much more sensitive as a vampire and the feeling of skin on skin alone was amazing. It was so different now. His caresses felt nice, awakening something within her and she didn't want it to stop. Bella tried to push all thoughts of loss and pain, mates, and right and wrong out of her mind. She just wanted to enjoy this little bit of pleasure in this moment. He _wanted_ to do this. He _wanted her_. It was a nice feeling to be wanted.

Peter's hands slowly moved up her torso until his fingertips were skimming lightly over the bottoms of her breasts. Her head fell back and she let out another soft moan. "That's it, lose yourself in the sensations, little one." Peter continued to murmur against her skin as he explored whatever flesh he could reach with lips and teeth. He continued his feather light assault on her breasts, brushing his fingers over her hardened peaks and pausing to pinch them lightly. She gasped at the feeling, but then tried to curl in on herself as if she was ashamed. "No one has touched you like this before, have they?"

Before she could respond, Peter had turned her around and she was now straddling his lap. Bella could feel his erection against her thigh and she gasped, pushing her hips into him. The motion was involuntary and embarrassed her, so she immediately jerked her hips away again. Peter gently lifted her head so he could see her face. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Everything you are feeling is completely natural. Let yourself go, little one." He slipped his hands to the back of her neck and swiftly untied the string to her bikini. Ever so slowly, he pulled the fabric away from her breasts as he kissed along her collarbone. She tasted divine and he wondered what it would be like to taste all of her. He firmly fondled a breast in each hand, enjoying the weight of them. Women were such stunning creatures and he'd never be tired of exploring every soft dip and curve of their bodies. He and Charlotte were hopelessly devoted to each other, but they often enjoyed other partners. They had shared lovers before, and although Charlotte would have loved to have joined in with Bella, they knew she was too shy for something like that. Peter just wanted to give her some modicum of happiness, pulling her out of that pit of despair she'd been wallowing in. Bella had been alone for ten months, and he knew that physical comfort and a release would do her some good. She was such a shy, beautiful little thing, and he wanted to worship her like the goddess she was.

He continued kissing down her chest, encouraged by the soft little moans and sighs he was coaxing from her. Charlotte had left them alone, not wanting Bella to feel any more uncomfortable than she already did. He looked up at her as he took her right nipple into his mouth, gently suckling at the little nub. The little 'o' formed by her soft pink lips made his dick twitch. He loved bringing women pleasure. He took it slow with Bella, spending a good deal of time lavishing her firm breasts with his mouth. She was highly aroused and panting, grinding her hot center on him every so often as she sought out some kind of friction. He slid his hands down her back and underneath her suit, cupping her ass and pulling her closer to him.

Bella gave into the sensations Peter was causing. She felt herself throbbing with pleasure and his hands and mouth seemed to be everywhere. She didn't want him to stop, even if part of her still felt it was wrong. Finally gaining some confidence, she tangled her fingers into his silky blond hair as he sucked and nibbled on her breasts. He groaned, and it only encouraged her to continue. She ran her hands over his back and shoulders, feeling his muscles flexing and shifting beneath his granite flesh. Peter's hands gripped her waist suddenly and flipped her around so that her back was against his chest and she was still straddling him. He grabbed both breasts in his hands and ground his throbbing cock into her ass. Bella was turned on even more by the idea that she had caused his erection and pressed herself back against him even harder. He was letting out little growls against her shoulder as his hands traveled down her abdomen and began to tease her by tracing the strings of her bottoms where they rested on her hips.

"Please..." Bella whispered, speaking for the first time.

Peter adored the sound of her begging. "Please what, little one?" He asked, sliding his hand between her thighs and over her swollen folds. "You want me to touch you here?" Peter pressed a finger against her a little more firmly and she bucked her hips into her hand.

"Yes." She moaned, throwing her head back against his shoulder. He nibbled along her shoulder and continued to stroke her lightly through the wet fabric. "More..." She pleaded, pressing herself into his hand.

Peter quickly slipped his hand underneath her suit bottom and slid his finger between her slick folds, earning him more dick twitching moans from her beautiful mouth. He ran his fingers over and around her swollen clit, working her into a frenzy. She began to rock her hips, and he traced her opening with his index finger. Bella cried out and jerked at the sensation, so Peter slid his finger inside her. He groaned at how tight she was and felt a thrill at knowing she was a virgin and he was the first to touch her there. He would have loved to bury his cock in her, but it wasn't for him to do. One day she would want that with someone who meant something to her. Her slick velvety flesh sucked at his finger as he began to slide it in and out. Bella's thighs began to quiver and he was sure she was close to cumming. Adding a second finger, Peter started thrusting himself against her backside in time with his fingers, feeling his own orgasm building. Bella was lost, panting and grunting, as she rocked her hips against his hand. The sounds she was making spurred him on and couldn't help adding his own to the mix. Knowing she was close, he curled his two fingers inside her, seeking out just the right spot that would send her spiraling into oblivion. It only took a few more thrusts like that before she cried out and her whole body spasmed in pleasure. Feeling her clenching around his fingers sent Peter over the edge and with one final grunt and thrust, he came against her back.

Exhausted and thoroughly sated, Bella collapsed against Peter. It was her first orgasm and she'd never felt anything so powerful and all consuming. His forehead was pressed against her shoulder and he was kissing her softly as he murmured sweet nothings against her skin. She knew there was nothing between them but a shared moment of pleasure. Peter had been right, it felt good to let go and feel something other than pain and sorrow. After being alone for so long, the physical intimacy was just what she needed. The guilt tried to creep in, whispering that this was another woman's mate and that she had betrayed _his_ memory by being with another man, but she pushed it away. She deserved something good.

Peter cradled her to his chest and kissed her cheek gently. "Fuck, little one, that was amazing. I hope it was good for you too." Bella nodded shyly. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Promise me you won't regret this?" She bit her lip and Peter groaned. "You'd better stop that before I take you again." He threatened with a smile. "I know this is new for you, but I don't want you to feel embarrassed about what happened here. Any time you want to play, you just let me or Charlotte know, ok?" She nodded again, not trusting her voice, and not knowing how to respond. She wasn't quite sure how she felt about everything, other than she definitely enjoyed it and was trying hard not to feel ashamed. After all, she'd only known these two for a week.

Peter stood up from the hot tub and gently set her down on the ground. Charlotte appeared with a fluffy robe and wrapped Bella up in it before giving her a warm hug. "I told you he would take care of you." She whispered in Bella's ear. "Why don't you go lay down for a little while?" Charlotte slipped an arm around Bella's waist and led her into the house to the guest room where she had been staying. Bella made herself comfortable and Charlotte sat down next to her. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. I promise it doesn't bother me in the least, and any time you and Peter would like to be together, it's fine by me. I'd like us to be friends, Bella. If there's anything you'd like to talk about, I'm here to listen. We don't have many friends because of what we are, and sometimes I get lonely for the company of another woman."

"Thank you Charlotte. It's been a long time since I've had a friend to talk to. Right now I'm a little confused, so I just need some time to myself, but I promise I'll come find you later." Bella replied with a soft smile. Charlotte was a kind person and Bella couldn't help but feel comfortable with her, despite what just occurred between she and Peter.

Charlotte gestured to the nightstand. "Jasper said you liked to read, so I bought you some books. If there's something specific you'd like, just let me know."

"You really didn't have to do that, but thank you."

"It was nothing. I'm going to go find Peter. I'm sure Jasper will be back soon. Anyway, I'm here if you need anything at all."

Bella gave Charlotte a warm smile, and the tiny blond vampire hugged her tightly before disappearing from the room.

What had she just done? Right and wrong battled in Bella's head. Clearly, this couple had no compunctions about having sex with other people. Bella didn't understand how she allowed herself to be talked into doing something like that, though she couldn't deny how pleasurable it was. Of course she'd always wanted to go further...before...with _him_, but he always refused. She tried to convince herself there was nothing wrong with a little experimenting. All of her senses were so much more heightened now and after so long without so much as a hug, she craved the touch of someone else. She had been so lonely, so desperate for a connection with someone. It was nice to feel wanted and to escape from everything for a little while. Bella wasn't sure she'd let it happen again, but she couldn't bring herself to feel too badly about it.

Shaking her head, she picked up the book on top of the pile on her nightstand and curled up in her bed to read. She wanted to get her mind off of everything that had happened today, and reading would be as close to sleep as she could get these days. The days and nights were endless in this life, and it had only been ten months. They had been right when they tried to tell her how different things would be, but it wasn't something she could truly understand until she experienced it first hand.

Bella could hear Peter and Charlotte in their room and buried herself in the book she was holding in an effort to give them some privacy. She was glad to hear that what had happened earlier had no bearing on their relationship. The two of them were insatiable and reminded her of Emmett and Rosalie.

Hours later she heard Jasper approaching the house. She had almost finished the book and was glad that Charlotte had picked out something fun and light. Bella decided to finish the last few pages and then she would go take a shower before going out to check in with everyone. She was on the last page of the book when her bedroom door crashed open and Jasper stood in the doorway.

He was pissed.

His eyes were black and his nostrils flared as he seethed. The anger rolled off of him and she could feel herself starting to respond as he broadcast his emotions loud and clear. Jasper didn't say anything and disappeared just as quickly as he had appeared.

"What the hell did you do to her?" She heard him roar in the living room before she heard the sound of splintering wood and boulders colliding. Bella gripped her robe closed with her hand and quickly ran out to see what was going on. The front door was destroyed and she found Jasper pinning Peter to the ground outside while Charlotte stood over them.

"Get off of him!" She screeched. "You have no idea what you are talking about. If we can all sit down and discuss this, you'll see that he didn't do anything wrong. Now, Jasper!"

Jasper still held Peter by the neck, snarling and snapping inches from his face. "You never could control yourself, could you? I knew I shouldn't have left her alone with you. The one time I do, you can't help but take advantage of her!"

The pieces clicked together in her mind and Bella found herself beside the two vampires, her hands on Jasper's shoulders, trying to push him away from Peter.

"Jasper, you don't have any idea what happened. Leave Peter alone and we can go discuss this. No one took advantage of me." Bella spoke quietly, but firmly.

Jasper's head snapped up as he absorbed her words. Her robe gaped open and he could see the inside curves of her naked breasts. The only item of clothing she was wearing under the robe was a pair of bikini bottoms, that were right at eye level. He knew something had happened between them, Peter's scent was all over her and she reeked of sex – both his and hers. Though he was quite aware that Bella was a woman, the thought of her joining in on Peter and Charlotte's sex games made him cringe. She was so innocent, and he couldn't believe she would do something like that, willingly, with someone she barely knew.

Bella pressed on his shoulders again, harder this time, and he released his old friend. Peter seethed and dusted himself off as he stood up. Charlotte appeared at his side and checked him over to make sure he was ok. Jasper and Bella stood facing off as he stared at her, trying to comprehend what she was saying.

"You need to apologize." She told him quietly. He gaped at her, but when her eyes flashed with anger, he looked past her and did just what she asked.

"I apologize, Peter and Charlotte." They nodded in acceptance and Jasper clenched his jaw, looking back to Bella for an explanation.

"I don't have to explain anything to you Jasper. My private life is just that, private. I appreciate you looking out for me, but I assure you I am capable of taking care of myself just fine. Now, if you'll excuse me, I should go shower." Bella turned on her heel, walking away from him, and Charlotte followed after giving both males the hairy eyeball in warning to play nice.

"I can't believe you." Jasper hissed at Peter.

"What? She's a fucking beautiful woman who has been suffering alone for way too long. So we had a little fun and she got a little pleasure. There's nothing wrong with that, man." Peter defended himself.

Jasper shook his head. "She's hurting and you took advantage of her."

"She wanted this. Bella's not some weak little human who needs your protection. She's a woman who is capable of making her own choices. If you would take your head out of your ass and stop making her feel like shit all the time, maybe you'd see it. As a matter of fact, maybe if you got laid your mood would improve as well."

"I don't make her feel like shit, Peter. We both lost two people we cared deeply about. That right there guarantees we'll feel like shit for quite a while. Fuck, is everything about sex with you?" Jasper scoffed.

Peter threw his hands up in supplication. "Hey, I get it. If I lost Charlotte, I'd be a wreck too, but at some point you have to stop wallowing and start living again."

"What do you think I've been trying to convince her to do? You know I've been trying to get her to move on!"

He shook his head. "I have to disagree there. You guys have had some serious talks, but that's about it. You've been manipulating her and trying to get her to go back to the Cullens, even if it's going to make her miserable. Did you ever think that maybe she needs more time? Maybe she wants to go out and have some fun, explore her new life and what kinds of things she can do now? You both could use some fun. Go to Vegas or some shit."

"She has to go back. You know that! The Volturi will be looking for her and I'm not going to allow anyone else to get hurt because of this fucked up situation. We can have fun with the family."

Peter stepped in closer. "Maybe _you_ can have fun with the family. _She_ obviously doesn't agree. She's been alone in the fucking woods for months, Jasper, maybe a little fun and companionship would do her some good. That stuffy doctor father of yours isn't going to give her that. All Rose and Emmett care about is fucking each other. Do you really think she wants to be in that house with two couples and reminders of everything she lost shoved in her face on a daily basis?

"Bella is a newborn, Peter. There isn't much else we _can_ do right now." Jasper threw his hands up in exasperation.

"Yeah, she's a newborn with better control than any of us. Make all the excuses you want, man, but let her make her own decisions. Otherwise she's going to resent you and you'll be alone for the rest of your fucking miserable existence." Peter turned to walk away. His last sentence caught Jasper's attention. He didn't know what his friend was trying to insinuate, but there was certainly nothing between him and Bella other than the obligation he felt to take care of her and bring her back to the family.

Suddenly Peter stopped and turned back around. "You used to be fun, man. We had some good times. I know you loved Alice, and she was good for you, but it's time for another chapter in your life." He looked up and smirked at his old friend. "After all, you did kill a couple people. Bella just got off in a hot tub. You shouldn't judge so harshly. And..." Peter started backing away towards the safety of the house. "...if you do need to get laid, you know Charlotte would love to have you in her bed again."

Jasper growled at Peter's retreating form, trying _not_ to remember the many times he'd joined them in the bedroom. That was before Alice. Everything was different now. He had responsibilities. He had a family, and Bella was a part of that family whether she wanted to be or not.

He sprinted off into the woods and flipped open his phone as soon as he was sure he was out of hearing range.

"_Is everything ok, Jasper?"_

"Yeah. I think it's time you guys came to visit."

* * *

**Just trust me, ok?** **Thanks for reading!**


	8. Chapter 8

She heard someone approaching quickly, but their footsteps were heavier than the three vampires she'd been staying with. The scent was different too. Bella wasn't sure if she should run or not, and before she could really decide, someone yelled her name and then something slammed into her. They tumbled hundreds of feet, taking out a few trees along the way. Before she could even react, her shield pulsed and whoever her attacker was landed on the forest floor, far away from her.

Three vampires materialized around the one she'd thrown.

"I told you not to do that, you idiot." Rosalie grabbed Emmett by the arm and helped him stand. She started cackling at the confused expression on his face. "Do you ever listen? I swear you are like a three year old sometimes."

Bella began to panic. They had come. Carlisle and Esme were watching her warily, and when she made no move to close the distance between them, Esme's face crumpled in disappointment. Carlisle looked at her like she was going to bolt any second, and as much as she wanted to, she couldn't run from them.

She was staring at them dumbly. Before she could figure out what to do, Peter and Charlotte appeared behind her and Jasper stopped at Carlisle's side.

"She won't run." Jasper told him. Her eyes locked on Jasper and she was consumed with seething rage. He had betrayed her trust. If she could have moved in that moment, she would have ripped his arms off.

Bella knew she had to get herself under control. "Charlotte?" She asked tentatively.

"Right here, little one. Just calm down, we're on your side." Charlotte stepped in front of her and took Bella's hands in hers, squeezing them gently in reassurance. "Jasper called them. We just found out. If we had known sooner, we would have warned you."

Bella was trembling. "I don't want to hurt anyone." She whispered desperately.

"We know. Just calm down, take deep breaths." Charlotte's voice continued to murmur in the background. An arm snaked it's way around her waist, and though her eyes were closed, she knew it was Peter. He stood behind her, and she felt safe between the two of them. "We won't let them make you do anything you don't want to do." He promised. Bella nodded and continued to breathe, allowing her two new friends to help her calm down.

"Jasper, if she wasn't ready, then you really should have told us." She could hear Carlisle chastising Jasper across the way.

"She's never going to be ready until she sees you in person. She still thinks you don't want her and the only way I see that getting resolved is if you're here where we can all talk face to face." He explained.

Rosalie huffed, clearly exasperated with the situation. She tossed her golden hair over her shoulder and pulled a bewildered Emmett along behind her as she stalked towards Bella.

"Bella."

Bella directed her attention to Rosalie and Emmett. "I'm sorry Emmett. I didn't mean to hurt you...you just took me by surprise..."

"Pshaw! It was actually kinda cool. I thought I'd have the upper hand...but wow! We never got to wrestle before...well..." He stuttered, but then his amber eyes twinkled with awe. "How did you do that?"

"I'm not sure." Her eyes flickered over to Jasper and Carlisle who were still watching her. "It's kind of like a defense mechanism. If I'm angry, or if someone surprises me..." She smiled sheepishly at him.

"Well that's awesome. At least I know you can handle yourself, little sister." He teased, and she didn't miss the reference. She would have blushed if she were still human. Emmett always did have a way of making her feel at ease. Despite his enormous size and muscles, his jovial attitude was endearing.

"We're not going to hurt you, Bella." Rose spoke up. "You don't have to hide behind Peter and Charlotte."

Bella hung her head. She wasn't really hiding, but it did kind of look that way to the others. Charlotte raised an eyebrow, silently asking if Bella was ok now. She nodded and Peter and Charlotte stepped back, but were still close enough in case they were needed.

Rose gave her a reassuring smile. "We missed you."

"I missed you too." Bella whispered.

Emmett held out his arms, wanting a hug and having learned his lesson not to surprise her. She stepped into his embrace and squealed when he lifted her off the ground and swung her around. "It's nice to be able to really hug you now." He laughed and she couldn't help the smile that escaped. She really had missed him.

When he set her down, Rose looked at her expectantly. "My turn?" She bit her lip, steeling herself for rejection, but Bella opened her arms to her sister, surprising them all. Rose's hug was quick, yet firm. "Thank you." She whispered, her voice full of emotion. Bella was surprised by Rose's demeanor. They had never been close, though Rose had been there somewhat after...but this was new, and she found that she liked it.

When she looked up, she saw Esme standing behind Rose with a hopeful look on her face. Maybe Jasper had been right and they did care for her. She couldn't deny the emotions that were evident on their faces. Rose stepped aside and as Bella took a step towards Esme, she scooped Bella up in her arms and held on for dear life. The scent of lilacs swirled around her and she inhaled greedily.

"I missed you so much, Bella. Don't you ever do that to me again. You have no idea how much you mean to us...how worried we've been." She whispered fervently in Bella's ear. Esme's embrace had always been a warm one, even though her skin was icy. It was a mother's embrace and she'd missed it. Each one of them had only confirmed what Jasper had been saying all along. She was a part of their family and they wanted her. Bella couldn't help but cling to Esme as dry sobs erupted from her chest. "Shh, baby girl. We're here now. You've still got a family and we'll do whatever we need to in order to make you see that. We missed you so much, Bella." Esme held her until she sobbed herself out, and with one last tight squeeze she released her.

Carlisle was next. His expression was riddled with guilt and regret. "Bella." His smile was kind and sincere. "I cannot tell you how sorry I am that we did not assure you of your place in our family. It pains me to think that for even one minute you believed we didn't want you. I have done an injustice to Edward and Alice's memory by not making sure you knew how much you are loved by all of us. I hope, that with time, we can prove this to you."

Bella nodded and accepted a hug from him.

He had extended an olive branch and Bella didn't know whether she should take it or not. She couldn't take being hurt by them again, but they seemed so sincere with their words, their emotions clearly evident on their beautiful immortal faces.

_Looks and words can be deceiving though._

How many times had he told her he loved her and would never leave her. Then, with a face of stone, he dismissed her as if she were a stray puppy he'd gotten tired of. The hurt was still fresh, despite the time that had passed. The memory had not faded with her change as she had hoped it would. It was the last time they had spoken before she saw him ripped away from her in Italy. It was their last moments together and he had shattered her with his words.

Bella glanced sideways at Jasper. He was studied his hands with feigned interest. She had told him numerous times she wasn't ready for this, and he completely ignored her wishes and pushed her into this. He hoped she could feel how angry and betrayed she felt. Apparently, he did, because his eyes flickered up to hers for an instant. For a moment she concentrated on wanting to shield her emotions from and and felt a slight tugging sensation. When his head snapped up again, she knew she had been successful. Bella narrowed her eyes at him. She was too upset with him and hoped he got the not-so-subtle message.

Everyone seemed to be watching her expectantly and she figured she should probably say something. They deserved some kind of explanation. After all they had spent a lot of time and energy looking for her, and Esme truly seemed relieved to see her. Esme, and maybe all of them, had spent the the better part of a year worrying about her. She should say something.

"I'm sorry to have worried you." The words spilled from her mouth. At least she had been polite. She couldn't say she was glad to see them, because as much as she might have missed them, she wasn't ready for the barrage of memories that came with their reappearance.

The air around them was awkward. Apparently her words did nothing to ease that. She shifted uncomfortably under their scrutiny, unsure of what they expected from her. There was so much bubbling under the surface, so much still unsaid.

"Why don't we all go back to the house?" Charlotte suggested, hoping to break the tension.

"Sure." Carlisle agreed, eyes flitting to each of his family members who nodded in agreement, but no one moved.

_Were they waiting for her to make the first move?_

She looked to Charlotte and Peter helplessly. The idea of being trapped in a house with all these people made her nervous.

"Why don't you all head back first. We'll walk with Bella." Peter suggested.

Carlisle studied Bella for a moment, wondering what he could do to ease this estrangement. A pang of sadness shot through him. She had been connected to the family by Edward, and by Alice to a slightly lesser degree. Without them in the picture, Bella probably didn't feel connected to the rest of the family. They had always been on the sidelines. Rose had avoided her at all costs, and Emmett had always stuck by his wife's side. Jasper had kept his distance, being the newest to their lifestyle. Edward hadn't trusted him around Bella, and maybe it was with good reason considering her disastrous birthday party. He and Esme had considered Bella a daughter, but they really hadn't spent that much time fostering a relationship with her. It was usually just the two of them, Edward and Bella, holed up together somewhere unless Alice dragged her away for a brief period of family time or shopping. He supposed that might have been their first mistake. Then leaving...well that had destroyed whatever there might have been between Bella and the rest of the family. They did leave without so much as a goodbye, which was quite unforgivable, but in their defense they had been sure Edward would come to his senses and return to her. Alice had assured them of this. How had everything gone so wrong? He frowned.

The four of them headed towards the house, but Jasper remained behind. He approached Bella carefully, quite aware of the low rumbling in Peter's chest. He looked at his old friend and wondered how the tables had turned. It hurt to see Peter and Charlotte protecting Bella from him. He hadn't done it to be malicious. He was only trying to help move things along. The sooner Bella was reunited with the family, the sooner he was free of this obligation he felt to make sure she was taken care of.

"Haven't you done enough?" Peter hissed, angling his body in front of Bella protectively.

This just served to piss Jasper off. "What the _fuck_, Peter? You barely know her. This between Bella and my family. Just because you fucked her doesn't mean you have some kind of claim on her." Bella's gasp caught Jasper's attention and, too late, he realized what he had just said. "Bella...I didn't mean..." He cast about for words and ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"Fuck you, Jasper." She spat, stalking off through the woods with Charlotte right on her heels. He didn't need his gift to know how much he had hurt her. He wheeled around and took out his frustrations on the closest tree.

"I think I should be asking you – what the fuck, Jasper?" Peter stood leaning up against a tree with his arms crossed over his chest.

"I didn't mean it like that." Jasper said sullenly.

"Yeah, well that's up to you to explain to her. I've never seen you so unbalanced, man. I thought you were doing better, but now I don't know."

"I just need Bella to go home."

"Why? Why is that so important to you? She's not a child and you can't make her do something she doesn't want to. Well, you can, but that's not the point – you shouldn't. Why can't you accept that?"

"Because I don't want to be responsible for her." Jasper tried to explain.

"Who says you're responsible for her?"

"What are you, a fucking parrot?" He shot back, not really wanting to go there right now. He wasn't ready for this discussion.

"I'm just trying to understand where all this angst is coming from. I understand you being upset about Alice, but I don't see how this has anything to do with that."

"I guess I just feel like someone has to look after her. She's still new to this life and has been all alone for so long. Edward and Alice would have wanted me to look out for her...but I can't. I'm not _that_ guy. I tried to take a bite out of her for fucks sake! If I know she's with them, then I know she's being taken care of."

"I see." Peter replied simply, a knowing look on his face. Jasper could feel how amused he was and it confused him.

"And what exactly do you see?" Jasper snarled.

"You care about her, and that scares the fuck outta you. So you're pushing her away." Peter always had such a way with words.

"How the hell did you get that out of this situation?"

"Easy. You've never forgiven yourself for trying to make Bella a snack. Because you couldn't keep a lid on your shit, your brother convinced the family to take off and leave her behind for her own safety. This set in motion the whole chain of events leading Edward and Alice to Italy, and you feel responsible for everything that went down. You can't do anything to make all this up to Edward and Alice because they're gone, but Bella is still here. The fact that she lost everything and was made into one of us weighs heavily on your conscience, so you think her safety is your responsibility. It's the only way you can reconcile with all three of them. _But_ you find yourself getting close to her. It's only natural, she's an intriguing little thing, not to mention hot as fuck." He smirked. "Both of you are going through the same thing, so you have common ground. It's comforting to have another person to relate to. The problem is that it scares the shit out of you because you don't want to get close to anyone ever again. You're afraid you're going to lose them."

Jasper gaped at his friend's assessment. Peter had managed to put into words all the shit he hadn't taken the time to sort out. He'd felt exponentially more unbalanced now that Bella was in the picture and couldn't put his finger on what the issue was exactly. Without mincing words, his old friend had summed up Jasper's entire emotional drama in a few sentences.

"You got a degree in psychology that I don't know about?" Jasper scowled.

Peter held up his hands in supplication. "Brother, I've known you longer than anyone. You _made_ me. I know how your mind works and even though you're the fucking empath, I can read you like a book. Dr. Seuss if you want to be specific."

Jasper just shook his head at Peter's lame attempt at a joke...or jab. "Of course I care about her." He admitted. "Alice and Edward both loved her. I just don't want to be responsible for anyone else at the moment. I've got my own shit to sort out."

"You can't make decisions for her." Peter pressed.

"I know, but I had to do something. She's always loved my family and they love her. It's not right for her to be alone when they're there for her."

"And what about you?"

"What about me?"

"Now who's the parrot?" Peter smirked. "Why should you be alone when they're there for you?"

Jasper was quiet. He knew they wanted him to stay, but it just felt so odd without Alice there. It had been her vision that brought them there, and he was thankful every day that he'd been given another chance and shown another way. But being there, with all those reminders of Alice, would be too painful. Maybe...just maybe...he had a lot more in common with Bella than he cared to admit.

"You're running from your family too. I get that you had a hard time with all that emotional shit at first, but now you're just pushing everyone away out of fear." Jasper scoffed. He was never one to be afraid of anything. "Yeah, I know. The great Jasper Whitlock isn't afraid of anything...except losing the ones he loves." Jasper sucked in a breath. Peter was right again of course. "It's ok. It's a normal reaction. You lost your entire fucking world and now you're isolating yourself so you don't ever have to go through that again. But you're going to be miserable, and you know it. You don't do the loner thing too well."

Peter had given him a lot to process and he was finished hashing all this out with him for the moment. He knew he was a fucking hypocrite. Pushing Bella into the same situation he'd been avoiding. They were both miserable on their own, but they were afraid of joining the family again.

"You don't have to say anything. Just think about it." Peter continued.

Jasper nodded. "Let's go." He suggested, jerking his head in the direction of Peter's house.

Five pairs of amber eyes stared him down as they walked through the door. Charlotte was fuming and the rest of the family wanted to know what was going on. Bella was in her room, he could feel her particular brand of emotions pulsing from further back in the house. He hated how attuned to her he'd become in the short while since he arrived. Even as a human she had broadcast her emotions strongly, and now, whenever she wasn't blocking him, he could hone in on her as soon as she entered his range.

Everyone was watching him expectantly and he had no clue what he was supposed to do. Peter had immediately relocated to Charlotte's side and was purposefully avoiding his pleading looks for help.

"I...umm...Bella..." Jasper pointed towards the back of the house and took off to go find Bella. He needed to apologize for the way he had treated her and the words he had said. They let him go without intervening, realizing this was something the two of them had to resolve on their own.

He found her sitting on her bed with her back against the headboard and arms around her knees. She was angry and hurt, glaring at him when he stuck his head in the door. He knew if he had knocked she wouldn't have let him in.

"I'm sorry." The words were so inadequate to convey everything he felt. Sighing in frustration, he steadied his gaze on her and took a moment to make sure her shield was down. Then he concentrated, sharing all his feelings with her. Bella's head snapped up as she was bombarded with foreign emotions. "Words aren't enough." He explained simply and she nodded, taking time to process everything he was throwing at her. She remembered watching Jasper and Alice sometimes locked in silent conversation that seemed too intimate for words. She realized now that they were indeed having the most intimate of discussions, baring their souls to each other. To have had that kind of connection with someone must have been wonderful. _He _could never read her mind and was so stoic that they were both left guessing about what the other was thinking which lead to many misunderstandings.

"Why would you do this?" She asked suddenly.

"Because you shouldn't be alone. They can look after you and help you acclimate to this life. They care about you and miss you." He cocked his head to the side. "I could go on."

"But I told you I wasn't ready, and you made them come here anyway."

"Maybe I shouldn't have, but I felt that you needed to see for yourself that they truly do care and consider you a part of the family. They don't blame you for anything, Bella. You shouldn't be alone when you have a family like that waiting for you to come home."

"Are you going, too?"

He pressed his lips into a firm line. "No..."

Her eyes flashed with fury. "Why not?" She demanded.

He didn't answer. She knew what his answer would be anyway. It was the same as hers. Jasper dropped his head. "I should leave you alone." He mumbled and turned to go.

Bella was blocking the doorway before he even took a step. "Oh no. You don't get to walk away from this." Her tiny fists were on her hips and he took a step back involuntarily, not wanting to be too close to her in case her shield flexed. "Let me guess. Being around them reminds you too much of Alice?" She hissed. "Seeing them hurting only makes your own pain worse?" She took a step towards him. "You're _not ready to go back_?" Another step and he had to will himself to stand still. "All the same reasons I had for not wanting to go back, but you're trying to force me into this anyway? What right do you have to decide my reasons aren't valid and yours are?" Bella was almost right up against him now and he could feel her breath across his skin as she panted. "What were you going to do – continue to wander alone? The same fate you're trying to save me from? I don't think so."

Suddenly, she backed away and sat back down on the bed. Jasper watched her warily, unsure of how to respond, or if she was even finished. She seemed to be contemplating something.

He felt her resignation and a moment later she looked up. "Fine. I'll go back." He felt a weight being lifted off his chest, but before he was free of this obligation, she spoke again. "When you do." Bella gave him a smug smile and the weight crashed down on him again. Jasper couldn't help the scowl he gave her, and was surprised when she laughed. He hadn't heard that sound from her since she'd been here.

"What's the matter, Jasper? Don't like playing your own game?" Her golden eyes danced with amusement. "It doesn't feel nice to be manipulated, does it?" She spoke softer now.

"I only wanted what was best for you." He replied sullenly.

"You're just like _him_. Always trying to make decisions for me regardless of what I want. You don't get to do that anymore. I'm my own person and I won't be forced into something just because it makes your life easier." She gave him a sad smile. "Don't worry, Jasper. I know you don't want me around, and I don't blame you. If it weren't for me..." She shook her head, dismissing that train of thought. Her voice filled with more conviction. "I won't be a burden to you. I'll go with them and leave you alone." He was overcome by her intense feelings of rejection and sorrow.

"It's not you. I promise you, it's not." He spoke quickly, before she could interrupt him. He projected every ounce of sincerity and truth to reinforce his words.

"How can I believe you when you manipulate me like that? How do I know you truly feel that way?" She whispered sadly.

"You have to trust me."

She scoffed. "Yeah, well...just go, Jasper. I don't want to be a bother."

"Bella..."

"Go!" She yelled. He could feel her losing her control, her shield pulsing, only giving him flickers of emotions. Bella flopped on her bed and buried her face in her pillow, growling. He wanted to go to her side and soothe her, to try to calm her down, but he knew he wouldn't be welcome right now. He'd probably end up being thrown through another wall and Charlotte would rip him apart if he destroyed any more of their house.

Rose appeared at his side and jerked her head towards the door, letting him know she would take care of Bella. Jasper hesitantly left the room and went to face the family. He knew they disapproved of the way he had handled things. They'd been through so much already and having Bella missing for so long had only worn them down even further. They had been so relieved when she was found, but hurt that she didn't want anything to do with them. Now, he'd given them false hope. They came out quickly, sure that she was ready to see them and return home, only to find out he had misled everyone. Their disappointment had been obvious.

The desire to go back with them was strong. He thought sending her home with them was best, but now he was having doubts. He found himself wanting to go with Bella just to make sure she was taken care of. Rose and Emmett were easily lost in themselves for days, if not weeks, at a time. Carlisle and Esme had their work and each other. He was beginning to understand why Bella might not want to be in a house full of reminders and happy couples. It would be the same thing Edward had gone through for so many decades. If he went with her, she wouldn't be alone so much. After all, he was trying to force her into doing something he wasn't willing to do himself. So, he would make things right and earn her trust again. He didn't want to care, but he did. He told himself it was his obligation to Alice and Edward. It was his penance for being the catalyst for so much tragedy.

Jasper finally spoke. "We'll come home, but only if she's ready." He took a moment to absorb the bursts of hope echoing through the room. Esme gave him a watery smile and would have been crying if her immortal body allowed her any tears.

"We would like that very much, Jasper...son." Carlisle was always so accepting. No matter what sins had been committed, he would always be there, ready to forgive.

Jasper felt like he had disappointed Carlisle though. He'd always struggled the hardest with their way of life, and once again his irises were slightly muddied from human blood. They were almost back to their usual honey color, but held a strange orange tint that made his transgressions obvious. It wasn't the first time, but he was still ashamed. Carlisle and Esme would never mention it, and he loved them that much more for not making an issue out of it. He felt guilty enough as it was.

"Why don't you all stay here for a couple days. It's been a while since we've visited with each other and there is plenty for you to hunt around here." Charlotte offered.

"Yeah, I can finally take Bella hunting!" Emmett exclaimed. He was so predictable, obviously excited about the extensive bear population in the area. Especially at this time of year when he could wake them from their slumber, making the hunt that much more exhilarating.

"Em, I'm actually quite full right now." Bella appeared in the hallway with Rose. "But as soon as I am ready to hunt again, you may have the honors. There's plenty of grizzly around here." A shit-eating grin spread across Emmett's dimpled face. "I'd like for you all to stay. I guess I owe you an apology for leaving like I did. I'm sorry. I just didn't want to be a burden...and..."

Esme quickly went to embrace Bella. "You don't have to explain anything, and you don't have to apologize. We all had a hand in this and I think it's best if we just try to move forward from here."

Bella nodded and sat beside Rose on the couch. She felt like her skin was crawling with all the attention focused on her. Everyone expected something from her and she couldn't give them anything – not yet. She didn't know where to go from here, or what to say.

Jasper noticed how uncomfortable she was, and sent her a wave of calm. She nodded her head slightly, but refused to look at him. He wasn't sure what to do or say either, though he was trying to think of something to get everyone's attention off Bella. Everything that came to mind would only increase their interest in her.

The awkward silence weighed heavily in the air, growing thicker by the moment.

Finally, Emmett spoke. "So, Peter? Do you have a game system?"

"No, I haven't gotten one for this place yet. The last time we were here was in the seventies."

"Well, let's go then!" Emmett stood up and gestured towards the door. Gold and scarlet eyes flickered from one face to another, trying to decide who wanted to go or stay.

Emmett, Peter, Charlotte and Jasper piled in Peter's truck and they headed off to town.

Rose and Esme smiled warmly at Bella and then excused themselves under the ruse of wanted to check out the local hunting.

Carlisle and Bella looked at each and chuckled uncomfortably.

"Well, that wasn't very subtle." He commented dryly and Bella agreed. "So, how have you been?" Carlisle winced at the lame question.

Bella shrugged. "It's been better, I guess, since I'm not alone anymore."

"I know that kind of loneliness all too well." He murmured, remembering the many years he'd walked this earth. "Edward told you my history, but I think you probably can appreciate it better now, after all you've been through." He smiled sadly at her. "After I awoke from the change, I wanted nothing more than to end myself. I was horrified of the monster I'd become. After trying to starve myself unsuccessfully, I discovered I could survive off the blood of animals, and that was all I did at first – survive." He glanced up at Bella with a meaningful look.

"A huge part of me was relieved that I had found an alternative food source. The very idea of taking a human life to sustain my own was simply unfathomable. With this new knowledge, I decided to try to make the best of what I was given. Eventually I found my way to Europe and began to study medicine. It gave me a purpose in life, something to fill up the endless hours. I thought maybe helping others would give me some kind of redemption. But through it all I was still unbearably lonely. Of course I was in contact with other humans, but I couldn't risk becoming familiar with any of them. It was depressing to feel so isolated amongst a sea of people, never being able to truly be myself. Each year bled into another, the scenery and faces changed, but I was still unchanged - nothing filled that aching loneliness. It was sixty years before I found the Volturi in Italy. They were different than the wraiths of the London sewers. These vampires were civilized, refined, and educated. It was a relief to finally be around others of my kind where I could be myself. I learned much during my time there, but something was still missing. They were constantly trying to cure me of my aversion to what they considered our natural food source, and thus I was still isolated in a way. They considered me an anomaly...unnatural. The rumors started, and then grew into legends. _Stregoni Benefici_ – the good vampire." he smiled wryly. "Of course, I had tried to persuade them of a gentler way of existing, and they, in turn tried to persuade me to their way, neither of us budging. After only a couple decades, I decided to move on. Heading to the New World, I dreamed of finding someone who shared my ideals. It was another sixty years before I had enough to courage to finally _create_ a companion, though I'd toyed with the idea numerous times."

"Edward." Bella whispered.

"Yes. If his mother hadn't begged me to do everything I could to save him, I don't think I would have found the strength. But it was as if she knew I could offer her son something more than any other doctor. So I did. My years of isolation and loneliness were over. I had a friend, a companion, a son." His voice grew rough with emotion as he remembered his time with Edward. A sad smile taking up residence on his lips as his eyes shimmered with venom. "That was the beginning of my family. Next I found Esme, then Rose and Em, and then Alice and Jasper found us. It was the family I never thought I'd have. I had companionship and I had a purpose in life with my work. Without either of those, my existence would still be as bleak as ever."

Carlisle paused, giving Bella time to process his words.

"I miss him, Bella. It feels like a piece of me has been ripped away. He was always there by my side. He was my best friend and I can't imagine my life without him in it. It hurts." Carlisle spoke in hushed tones as he shared his grief with her. "I can't tell you how happy I was when he found you and then how devastated I was at his decision to leave. That light you brought to his existence, was the same light he brought to mine. I had every faith he would find his way back to you. I'm so sorry we failed you, Bella."

"Carlisle..." He held his hand up, cutting her off.

"I should have done more. I should have insisted we stay. But he so rarely asked for anything, and I indulged him, thinking it would pass, and it would have...I know he would have come back." Carlisle's face twisted in pain. "Each of us blames ourselves for what happened, but no one other than Edward can take responsibility for his actions. He is the one who made those decisions that resulted in the end of his life. We have never, for one second, blamed you. How could we? When you were the one who brought him to life...who gave my son a reason to live again." He looked up to meet Bella's gaze. "And Alice...pure, sweet Alice. She knew better than anyone what she was walking into. It was her choice, just as it was Edward's. If you need to blame someone, it should those vile guardsmen who killed them. Edward and Alice had done nothing wrong and yet they saw fit to destroy two good, kind souls. The Volturi have grown greedy for power and they have got to be stopped..." Bella had never seen Carlisle's eyes black with rage like that before. He shook his head to rid himself of the murderous thoughts running rampant in his head. He murmured an apology and took a moment to compose himself.

When he opened his eyes again they were back to their familiar warm gold color and his expression had softened. "You should never have had a reason to doubt your place in our family. It pains me to think that you experienced even one fraction of the loneliness I did, because we failed to show you how much we cared. Bella, we may have left, but we never stopped loving you. We never stopped hoping for the day when you and Edward would be together, eternally a part of our family. I'm sorry that you were made to believe you weren't good enough for us or that we didn't want you. I had no idea what Edward planned to tell you at the time, but I do know that it was all lies. He told you whatever he thought he had to in order for you to let him go. There was absolutely nothing that could ever have distracted him from thinking of you every minute of every day. I knew my son, and he loved you with every fiber of his being. Never doubt that, and never doubt our love for you either. You are more than just Edward's mate, or girlfriend. You are our daughter, our sister, and our friend. You have touched all of our lives and we want nothing more than for you to come home with us. I understand if you need more time, just please don't shut us out completely. We'll always be here for you, Bella."

Bella was too overcome with emotion for words. Instead, she slid across the couch and nestled into Carlisle's side. He wrapped an arm around her and they sat there together for some time before Carlisle spoke again.

"It's easy to look at the past and think about all the what ifs. Some days I wonder if we all should have left after as soon as Alice had her first vision of you. You never would have been dragged into our world and all the danger that goes with it. However, I cannot find it in me to regret staying. I am glad we got to know you, and that you and Edward found each other. - even if it was only for a short while."

"I'm glad you stayed, too." She whispered.

"I'm sorry for all you have lost, Bella. It was never my intent to separate you from your loved ones."

"I know. It's not like I hadn't thought about it...before...when I thought I might be joining your family at some point. I'm sorry for your losses, too, Carlisle."

"We'll get through it. We'll remember the good times and remind ourselves how lucky we were to have known them. Edward and Alice both experienced more in their lifetimes than most humans do. I'd like to believe they led full, happy lives, for the most part."

Bella nodded, her head sliding against the soft cotton of his shirt. She inhaled, allowing his comforting scent to wash over her. Leather and fresh apples. She'd missed this kind of contact. Nine months was a long time to go without so much as a hug, and even though Charlie had never been overly affectionate, she missed him dearly. For all intents and purposes, Carlisle was now her father. It was his venom that burned through her veins and brought her into this existence. It would be his guidance she would seek in this immortal life. He would be the one to comfort her from now on.

"Jasper told me you had a run in with Victoria." Carlisle began softly.

"Yeah."

"Would you like to tell me about it?" He probed.

Bella found herself wanting to open up to Carlisle and wondering why she had ever wanted to run from them in the first place. Of course she knew why, but it all seemed so trivial now. When she returned with Carlisle from Volterra, everyone had been so upset that she had been left alone for the most part. Jasper had obviously blamed her and she assumed everyone else did as well. No one told her otherwise. No one said much of anything to her, but it's not like she really tried to talk to them either. Seeing them again and talking with Carlisle reminded her of how much she had missed them. Each of them had tried to show her, in their own ways, that they did care. Carlisle's words were so sincere, that she couldn't doubt them, and it was hard to hold onto the anger and hurt now that they were here, making her feel wanted...making her feel loved.

Bella relaxed into Carlisle's side and told him about Victoria, along with everything else that had happened while she'd been away. They talked about her shield, and he promised to help her learn to control it. Esme and Rose returned shortly after that and Esme sat on the other side of her, taking Bella's hand in hers. She felt cradled like a child between the two of them, and it was exactly what she needed. While Bella may have been a deadly predator, she was also still an eighteen year old girl who had her entire world ripped apart. A mother's embrace feels like home whether you are five or fifty, human or vampire, and sometimes it's just nice to be taken care of.


	9. Chapter 9

"Come on, Bella!" He roared from the yard.

She finally darted out of the house to join Emmett and Rose for the hunt she promised. Peter decided he wanted to go as well. Seeing Bella take down a grizzly was guaranteed to be prime entertainment. Charlotte had followed Bella out of the house and then kissed both her and Peter on the cheek, giving Bella a stern look and making her promise to have fun. Carlisle and Esme watched from the front porch, smiling indulgently as they shook their heads at the overeager Emmett.

"Try to keep up!" He teased her as he took off into the forest with Rose at his side. Bella turned to Peter and rolled her eyes before loping off after them, and he was hot on her heels. He enjoyed watching the way she danced through the forest as graceful as a wood sprite. Her long hair flew out behind her in dark waves and her skin glimmered where the sunlight kissed it.

Bella felt so carefree and light as she ran through the forest. Everything else seemed to melt away as the flora and fauna flew by her. She could sense everything in her path and discovered new sights, scents, and sounds all the time. Who knew you could smell ants? Her bare feet squelched into the compost on the forest floor, her toes snapping any twigs that got in her way. She'd struggled to stay upright and avoid injury for most of her human life, so the ability to run so quickly without stumbling through a forest, without worrying if she would slice her foot on a rock or prick her skin on a thorn was one of the things she enjoyed most about her new life.

She heard Emmett's warning and slowed to a stop next to him. There was a natural cave up ahead and she could already smell the warm, rich blood of the bear inside of it. His heart beat slow and thick like a bass drum. It was quite different from the deer and elk she was used to.

"Alright, little sister, there you go." Emmett gave her a huge dimpled grin. Rose and Peter took to a nearby tree to watch, wanting to stay out of the way.

"What am I supposed to do, just walk in there and take him?" Bella asked.

Emmett laughed heartily. "Where would the fun be in that. You wait here, and I'll be right back." He winked as he jogged up to the cave. A moment later, an inhuman growl echoed off the cave walls. She could hear Emmett taunting the poor beast, trying to lead it into the open. It wasn't long before the enraged bear came barreling out. As it stood on his hind legs, he easily towered over Emmett's impressive height, the dark, shaggy fur, making it look even more massive than it was. With it's huge paws, it swiped at Emmett, but he darted out of the way at the last second, further riling up the angry ursine. When he was satisfied, Emmett called her over and told her to have at it.

Rationally, Bella knew the great beast couldn't hurt her, but that didn't help her trepidation. Emmett disappeared and the bear set it's sights on Bella, her smaller stature making her a more appealing target. She crouched instinctively, ready to defend herself while trying to figure out how best to approach the animal. It was loping towards her now, so she ran head on to meet it. When it reared up on it's hind legs again, she reached up to grasp the head, but the beast wrapped it's arms around her first in what would be a crushing hug to a human. Bella couldn't help but laugh to herself about how similar Emmett's hugs were to this grizzly's. She felt his great claws attempt to slice across her skin, but of course they found no purchase in her marble flesh. Pushing herself out of the bear's embrace, she leapt quickly onto it's back, further enraging the animal before snapping it's neck and ending it's life. After ripping the fur away from it's neck, she sank her razor sharp teeth into the flesh above it's jugular. Great hot spurts of blood rushed over her lips and down her throat as she greedily gulped it down. It was thicker and sated her more than the other animals she'd hunted. As the last drops were sucked from the carcass, she thanked the animal for it's sacrifice and gently laid the massive form on the ground.

Through her blood induced euphoria, she vaguely realized her three companions had joined her. Emmett was elated with his new little sister's first grizzly hunt and Rose was wrapped around him as usual. As some of the red fog cleared she caught their eyes taking in her appearance. Looking down at herself, she found that her clothes were in tatters and left her nearly naked, smeared with blood. Apparently, she was a messy eater. Wrapping her arms around herself, Bella would have blushed furiously if she could have.

"Bella." Peter growled from behind her. When she turned to face him, the hunger in his eyes sent a shiver through her. He stalked towards her slowly, never taking his eyes off of her. She couldn't help the way her body responded to him, and she purred, surprising herself. The fresh blood coursed through her, making her feel even more powerful and there was an undeniable need burning in the pit of her stomach, wanting to claim this male in front of her.

Someone cleared their throat, but the sound barely registered. Bella was too busy drinking in the sight of Peter in front of her, his erection straining against his low slung jeans and his eyes roaming over her body hungrily. He was inches away from her now and his eyes zeroed in on a trickle of blood that had escaped her mouth. Pressing his open mouth and tongue to where it stopped at the hollow of her throat, Peter lapped at the rivulet of blood, up her neck and jaw to her lips. He didn't kiss her, but their eyes locked in a lustful gaze and they were both panting with need.

"Right, well, we'll take care of this. Why don't you go get cleaned up, Bella. There's a river not too far..." Emmett's voice faded into the background as Peter held out his hand for her. She took it without hesitating and they soon found themselves running through the woods towards the sound of rushing water.

"Let me help you with that." Peter purred when they reached the river. He ripped the remaining shreds of her outfit from her body. She yelped with the sudden movement, but the ache between her legs grew stronger. A voice in the back of her head told her she should be ashamed, but her physical response overruled any rationality. She'd never felt anything like this before...not even with..._him..._

Peter's nostrils flared as he breathed in her heady scent. He could smell her arousal and it only served to make him even harder for her. He struggled to control himself, not wanting to pounce and ravage her like he would have Charlotte. Bella was delicate and new to these kinds of things and he wanted to cherish her innocence. She stood in front of him in a pair of pale blue lace panties, remnants of her hunt still smeared on her skin. Her dark tousled hair framed her porcelain features, and her lips were fuller and redder from the blood she'd just consumed. In a flash, he stripped and was standing before her naked and glistening in the sun. Her breath hitched and as he took in her expression, his cock twitched. She wanted him. He was exquisite. Bella's eyes were darkened with lust, but she was still so timid. Peter took her hands once more and led her to the river.

"Let's get you cleaned up, little one." The water was icy and tried to tug their bodies into the current, but they were immovable stone.

Bella dipped her head under the water and when she broke the surface again, Peter was waiting for her. He closed the distance between them and pulled her flush against his body. Lowering his mouth to her neck, he began to place open mouth kisses along her damp skin. The breathy moans that she made only spurred him on. His herd length pressed into the smooth skin of her stomach, straining for some kind of friction. Peter ran his hands down her bare back to the curves of her ass, and his fingers danced down between her legs as he parted her thighs and lifted her up. Bella wrapped her legs around him instinctively and gasped when she felt him hard against her soft center. He rubbed himself against her a few times, feeling her soft folds through the wet fabric of those tiny panties.

Peter reached up and loosened her arms from around his neck and then, making sure he held her securely, leaned her back until she was mostly floating in the water. He turned so that the current was flowing against his back, rushing over their entwined bodies. A water nymph now writhed against him, her dark tresses fanning out above her head tangling with the current. Bella's nipples were tight peaks above the water, begging for attention, and Peter couldn't ignore them any longer. He lowered his mouth to suckle them one at time, making her thrash with need. She anchored herself to him with her thighs, grinding against him and making him moan in pleasure. Her breasts were so sensitive, and she was so responsive, that he couldn't help but spend a good amount of time kissing, licking, and nipping each one, driving her into a frenzy. The sounds escaping her mouth made him impossibly harder. Her skin was sweet and floral, and decidedly feminine. He wanted more. He needed to taste more of her. Their hips continued to thrust against one another and Bella whimpered each time the head of his cock pressed into her throbbing clit. Her muscles clenched with each thrust, sending her spiraling towards the edge. The water caressed her body like rippling silk and tugged at the tendrils of her hair like a sensuous massage, lulling her to relax and enabling her to feel every ounce of pleasure Peter was trying to bring her.

Bella's eyes were hooded with lust and she was panting and writhing, getting closer to cumming with each thrust. As much as he wanted to finish, this was about her.

"Bella," He panted. "I need to taste you." His pleading was barely heard above the roar of the river, but she nodded.

He lifted her up so that her body was flush with his again and headed towards the edge of the river where he'd spotted some large boulders that would be perfect. The sun had heated the rocks, even in the cold weather, and Bella hummed at the warmth. Peter laid Bella out on one of the smoother rocks and hovered over her as he lavished kisses over her throat and collarbone, before dragging his lips and tongue lower. He stopped once again at her breasts and spent a few moments giving her taut pink nipples more attention. She arched her back and tangled her fingers in his hair, holding him to her chest as she whimpered at the sensations. Dipping his tongue in her bellybutton made her squirm, but as he moved lower, nipping at her hipbones, she was desperate for him to get to where she needed him most. Peter knew just how to play her body, coaxing beautiful sounds from her sweet little mouth. Wrapping his arms under her hips and spreading her legs in front him, he was eager to taste the essence of her. He lingered at her thighs, breathing in her intoxicating scent deeply.

"Peter..._please_..." He was surprised to hear her begging and smiled against her delicious folds, before ripping her panties off in one yank and finally dipping his tongue into her, licking in one firm stroke from her opening to the bundle of nerves that was pulsing with need. Bella gasped and moaned, arching her back at the pure pleasure that raced through her. Peter began to move his mouth in earnest, sucking and nibbling gently along her lips, swirling his tongue around her clit. When he pressed his tongue against her opening she cried out loudly and her hands grasped at the rock below her, trying to find purchase in it, but only finding two handfuls of gravel instead.

Peter chuckled, the vibrations causing her to whimper and grind her sweet pussy into his face. He lapped at her juices, savoring the delectable honey that poured from her. Sliding his tongue into her as deeply as possible into her earned him the sexiest growl and he could feel his own moisture gathering at the tip of his erection. It wasn't long before her thighs began to quiver and her hands clutched at his hair, trying to hold him in place so he wouldn't stop. Low moans wound their way from her throat as she started to thrust rhythmically against him, faster and harder with every passing second. When her hips began to jerk uncontrollably, he slowed down and began to lick her with long, slow strokes, prolonging the pleasure.

"_Oh..oh...yessssss." _She screamed as her entire body seized up and white hot blinding light seared through her. When she finally came down from her orgasm, Peter placed little kisses all over her swollen flesh causing her to shiver and moan with aftershocks whenever he hit a particularly sensitive spot.

Bella propped herself up on her elbows as soon as she felt like her arms could support her. Her legs were still quivering. Peter grinned up at her, pleased with himself. She bit her bottom lip. Now that the intensity of the moment was over, doubt crept back into her mind once again. This was another woman's mate between her legs and she barely knew him, even if the three of them had become fast friends. _They both offered him to you. He wants this. She wants this. There's nothing to be ashamed of. _ Peter and Charlotte's words echoed through her head and she tried to be confident that everything that happened was okay. Then Peter stood up and her eyes focused on his cock standing proud and glistening with his own fluids. She licked her lips as she took in the sight of him, wondering what he would taste like. He smirked and made it twitch for her.

"See something you like?" He asked.

"Mmm." She nodded. "Can I...touch it?"

Her innocence was endearing, but it also made him feel somewhat like a lecherous old man. Maybe Jasper was right and he was taking advantage of her. He hadn't done anything she didn't want...or like. Peter shook his head, refusing to let himself get too carried away with doubts. Jasper just needed to chill the fuck out and quit being so overprotective.

"Of course." Peter replied softly, moving closer as she sat up fully and reached out tentatively.

First she stroked lightly up and down the shaft with her fingertips, and the look on her face was one of awe. "It's so hard, but so soft at the same time." She murmured. When she closed her tiny fist around it, his eyes rolled back in his head and his hips bucked into her hand. "Was that okay?" She asked timidly as she loosened her grip.

"That was better than okay, little one." Peter reassured her.

She rubbed her thumb across the liquid that had seeped out and smeared it over the head, licking her lips once more. He silently willed her to taste him, but would never put it into words. Peter wanted her to ask for it on her own, so he knew it was something she wanted to do. He could tell the moment her curiosity decided for her and an instant later she had ducked her head closer to him and flicked out her tongue to taste him. The feel of her firm, wet tongue flicking over the head of his engorged cock nearly made him explode right then. He chastised himself internally for turning into a teenager again.

Bella wasn't sure how to proceed. Peter had brought her so much pleasure with his mouth, and she knew men liked that in return, but this was the first time she'd ever seen _that_ part of a man, up close and in person. She was terrified she would do something wrong. She pulled her head back and tightened her hand around him once more, more confident that she could bring him pleasure that way. Bella watched as her hand slipped up and down his erection, marveling at the unique feel of the skin there. Peter's scent was concentrated in his groin and the more she rubbed him, the more she was surrounded by the distinct smell that was Peter. It was honey and sage, earthy and entirely masculine. It was comforting and arousing. He was beautiful, his body chiseled perfection, and the fact that he cared so much for her only heightened her attraction to him, as well as Charlotte. Peter's wife was beautiful as well, and Bella couldn't deny she was attracted to the female vampire, but she wasn't ready to explore those feelings just yet. One day, maybe, she mused to herself, wondering what another woman's body would feel like against her own. Bella allowed herself to fantasize briefly about enjoying both the hard steel of Peter and the soft velvet of Charlotte at the same time as she continued to stroke Peter's cock. It was a fantasy she would most likely never speak of. Peter's eyes were closed and his head thrown back in pleasure. Groans rumbled in his chest and his hands fisted on his hips as if he was restraining himself from touching her. Bella reached out with her other hand and gently cupped his balls, massaging them as gently as she could, terrified of hurting him. A sharp growl erupted from him and when she looked up, he staring back at her with his mouth hanging open in pleasure. She smiled, pleased that she was the one coaxing these feelings and sounds from him.

"So good, Bella." He murmured, his hips starting to rock in rhythm with her strokes. This encouraged her to pick up the pace and the moans she coaxed from him went straight to her pussy. She never knew bringing someone pleasure like this could be so arousing. Bella was feeling so empowered that she decided to go for it, and lowered her head once more in order to take him into her mouth.

Peter stared down at her in shock when he felt her tongue lapping at his sensitive head and he placed his hands on her shoulders intending to tell her she didn't have to do that. He was so close already. But when she pushed against his restraining hands and closed her lips around his shaft, all rational thought was lost. His hands tangled in her hair and he gently guided her head down his shaft. She took in all of him and his knees nearly gave out when he hit the back of her throat. Her mouth felt so warm and wet around him that he purred in pleasure. He tenderly tugged at her hair, helping her set a steady rhythm as she fucked him with her mouth. Apparently, she liked what she was doing because Bella was humming and moaning around his cock as her delicious little mouth slid up and down his shaft. The vibrations only caused his dick to swell even more and the warm coil of his impending orgasm began to wind itself in his lower belly. Bella wrapped her hands around him, grabbing his ass for leverage as she worked him over. When Peter looked down at her again, she was looking up at him. The sight of her amber eyes watching him from under her dark lashes, combined with the view of her lips stretched around his cock as it disappeared into her mouth pushed him over the edge. He grunted out a rough warning and tried to pull her away, but she tightened her grip on his ass and took all of him into her mouth as he came. Pleasure pulsed through him as hot spurts of venom erupted into her mouth. She drank it all down and licked his cock clean before sitting back with a satisfied smile. Peter pried his hands from her hair and began to gently stroke her face and shoulders as he tried to compose himself.

"Bella..." He breathed, unable to keep the grin off his face. She was grinning too, but there was an uncertainty in her eyes. He needed her to be okay with this and was quick to reassure her. "That was amazing, little one. Are you okay?" He asked. Bella dropped her eyes shyly and nodded. He cupped her chin, forcing her to look up at him again. "Please don't feel ashamed. That was beautiful."

"I'm fine. I just hope it was good for you." She said in barely a whisper. She was still so shy and didn't like to talk about it.

"You have no idea." Peter groaned. "If Charlotte wasn't about to join us, I'd be ready for another round." He looked her in the eye. "You are amazing, Bella. Don't let anyone ever make you feel unworthy."

They both turned as they heard Charlotte approaching. She stopped at the tree line with a grin plastered on her face and then sauntered over to the two naked and sparkling vampires on the rocks. "Mmm mmm. Now that is quite the view." Charlotte plopped down on the rock next to Bella, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close before kissing Bella right on the lips. Bella gasped at the unexpected affection. "He's quite delicious, isn't he?" Charlotte whispered conspiratorially. As embarrassed as Bella was, she couldn't help but giggle and nod. Charlotte always had a way of making her feel at ease, especially considering what she and her husband had just done. "Nothing to be ashamed of. Always remember that. I give you both my blessing and there's nothing wrong with what you did." Bella nodded again, more soberly this time.

Charlotte took off the backpack she had been carrying and unzipped it. "I thought you two might like some clothes. Going back to the house naked is probably not the best idea." She tossed a bundle of clothes to each of them. "They all know." She told Bella seriously. Anxiety flashed on Bella's face, but she quickly tamped it down and tried to look nonchalant with a shrug.

"It's none of their business." She stated.

Charlotte nodded as she watched Bella, knowing the girl wasn't completely comfortable with everyone knowing her business. That was just a part of the package when it came to vampire life. Their senses were too acute. It was overwhelming at first, but through the years, one learned to tune out most of the sounds, sights and smells that surrounded and accosted them. Getting used to the way the vampire brain processed all these things took time, and eventually they came to view things, like privacy, much differently than humans. Charlotte knew that once Bella returned to the Cullen's house, she would have to learn to deal with all of this quickly. She and Peter had toned it down while Bella and Jasper had been with them. Since both of them had lost mates, they didn't want to flaunt their relationship in front of the two brokenhearted vampires. Charlotte couldn't be sure that the two remaining Cullen couples would extend that same courtesy and worried about how Bella would handle it.

Bella and Peter had dressed quickly and taken their seats back on returned to the rock. Charlotte pulled Bella's head down into her lap and began using her fingers to comb out the snarls caused by the water and writhing. Peter picked up her feet and placed them in his lap, massaging her feet and calves absently as the three of them basked in the sun and the sound of the river.

"You know you don't have to go, Bella. You're welcome to stay here until you're ready to move on – whether that is on your own or back to them." Charlotte offered.

Somehow, Bella had wormed her way into their hearts more than anyone else they'd come across since Jasper. It was no secret that both Peter and Charlotte were attracted to her, but there was more. They felt protective of her. It wasn't just pity that fueled these feelings, either. Bella had captivated them, as she had every other vampire she'd encountered in one way or another. On the surface, there didn't appear to be anything extraordinary about the girl, but Charlotte knew better than to ignore her instincts. She had to make sure Bella was taken care of.

"Thank you, but I need to go with them. They have done so much for me, it's the least I can do. I couldn't bear the thought of anyone else being hurt because of me." Bella spoke quietly, resigned to the plan. She truly didn't want anyone else to be hurt, and the possibly that the Volturi could hold the Cullens responsible for her absence terrified her. They had proven to be vile creatures, caring little for the sanctity of life. They had killed, without remorse, two of the most beautiful beings she'd ever known. The rest of the family had to be protected, and if that meant she had to stay with them, then she would. She would do whatever it took to keep those she loved safe.

Charlotte frowned at Bella's obvious reluctance, but didn't push the issue further. The three of them sat and talked of many things as the sun continued it's journey across the sky. Bella was fascinated to hear of all the things the couple had done and seen, and wondered what all she might experience during her existence. They carefully avoided speaking much about their time with Jasper in Maria's army and Bella understood that it was a painful time for them all. She questioned them about their choice in diet and they explained that they only fed on criminals and the terminally ill, so their deaths did not weigh too heavily on their consciences. They frankly had no desire to hunt only animals and didn't feel the need to deny themselves human blood when they could help society out with their hunting habits. It made sense to Bella, just as she accepted and understood Edward's rebellious phase. Bella paused when the realized she hadn't flinched at the thought of his name. While Bella could understand their stance, it was not something she could bring herself to do. Ending another human's life, even if they were dying and in pain would be too difficult for her. She didn't really like taking the lives of animals either, and if she was honest, hunting held no interest for her. It was merely a chore and something she must do in order to stay strong. There was never any uncontrollable burning in her throat, and the blood of the animals never really called to her. She hunted to satisfy everyone else. It never filled the aching emptiness inside of her.

When the sun began to set behind the trees, Charlotte unfolded herself from the rock and stood. "We need to get back. You're going out with me and Rose tonight, Bella."

The shock was evident in her expression. "What?"

"You heard me. Vampire hearing is flawless." Charlotte smirked.

Bella smacked her playfully on the arm. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see." She called back over her shoulder as she sprinted in the direction of the house.

Bella turned her questioning gaze on Peter who merely shrugged and held out his hand for her to take. They ran off through the trees together, Bella letting go of his hand and racing ahead as fast as she could go. The feeling was like nothing else and reminded her of Edward. She felt closest to him when she was flying through the trees and could almost feel him beside her, his large hand engulfing hers, and a breathtaking smile on his perfect face. How many times had she dreamed of doing just that with him once she was changed? Now here she was and he was gone. The pain always hit her hard when she thought about it, but she pushed on, determined to not let it take her down. Her legs pumped tirelessly against the forest floor until she could see the house through the trees. Jasper was back. She could smell him, and she was not looking forward to facing him again. Their tentative truce was sure to end once he smelled Peter on her again.

Luckily Rose and Charlotte were waiting for her outside. She could see Jasper inside the house, watching her sullenly through the window. Bella tried to ignore his blatant scowl.

"Should I change?" Bella looked to Rose for an answer.

"Nah, you'll be fine. Let's go." Rose motioned to Peter's truck and they all climbed in, Bella perched in the middle of the bench seat, straddling the gear shift. The truck's vibrations reminded her of the red behemoth she left behind in Forks. Bella wondered why her human memories hadn't faded as Edward had said they would. Maybe it was just a matter of time before they would start to slip away. She would have to ask Carlisle.

"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" She asked again, as the truck rumbled down the dark highway.

"There's a small town just down the road. We're going to go shopping." Rose told her.

"But...I..." Bella began to panic at the thought of being immersed in a store with humans. What if she couldn't control herself? What if she hurt someone?

"You'll be fine." Charlotte tried to reassure her. "You remember when we found you? You were so starved, you should have obliterated that human as soon as he got close enough for you to smell, but you didn't even show an inkling of interest. Tell me, do you ever feel the burn worsening, or an uncontrollable need to hunt?"

"I guess not." Bella whispered. "But I can't be sure..."

"Of course you can't know for sure. That's why we're going. We'll be right by your side, and at the first hint of trouble, we will get you out of there. But I really don't think you're going to have any problem at all. It's like your thirst is muted or non-existent."

"Alice always said you were going to be an extraordinary vampire." Rose said with sad smile.

Bella looked at her in surprise.

"I know I was never particularly welcoming to you, Bella, but I always knew you'd be a part of our family eventually. I may have wished you'd choose your human life over our immortal one, but I couldn't deny how happy you made my brother. Alice would talk to Jasper about her visions all the time, and of course we couldn't help but overhear some of it. I don't know the specifics, but she knew you were going to surprise us all. She knew what she was doing, Bella. I can't imagine the burden she had to bear, always knowing what was to come, and not all of it pleasant."

Bella hummed in response. She had wanted nothing more than to have her best friend by her side for eternity and her absence was definitely noticed. The mood in the truck had turned somber, and Bella's anxiety was building. She wished she knew for sure that everything was going to be okay. It was true that she didn't really feel the burn or thirst as much as she thought she should, but this was a new situation and she was afraid of losing control. Even though she and Jasper were at odds right now, Bella wished he was here to help. She knew how strong she was and worried that if something did happen, Charlotte and Rose wouldn't be able to stop her.

"We're not going to just march into a crowded store right away, Bella." Charlotte changed the subject and tried to assuage Bella's fears. "As soon as we get close enough for you to smell them, we'll stop and see how you respond. We'll take it from there." She patted Bella's knee. "We all had to start somewhere."

They parked on a deserted street and climbed out of the truck waiting for Bella to join them. She held her breath, remembering how it had helped Edward sometimes. Bella tentatively climbed out of the truck, almost shaking from nerves. Charlotte and Rose each looped and arm through hers.

"Take a breath." Rose coaxed. "We've got you."

Bella took a small breath after a moment's hesitation. She could smell the humans in the town just around the corner. The air was saturated with so many different scents, but the smell of human blood was unmistakable even to her. It smelled the same as it had during her human life, all tangy copper and iron, but stronger. There was no uncontrollable thirst taking over her body and her throat didn't suddenly burst into flames at the scent either. Bella began to breathe regularly and relaxed minutely in relief. Charlotte and Rose watched her carefully, and then nodded, satisfied that Bella was well in control of herself. They pulled her forward and the trio headed closer to the corner where they would turn onto the main street of the small town. It was late evening, and there weren't many people out. There were about ten blocks that made up the main part of the town and most people were congregated around the restaurants, coffee shop and bar. There were some teenagers hanging out outside of a small music store. They walked down the sidewalk slowly, paying close attention to the newborn vampire between them. After one pass through the town, Bella was confident that she could control herself around humans. It amazed all of them that she didn't seem to lust after the human blood surrounding them at all. Charlotte's eyes zeroed in hungrily on a few humans who smelled particularly good, and Rose ignored them all with her chin held high. Rose had never tasted human blood and vowed that she never would, though she would never admit that her throat did burn more intensely when she smelled it. The pull, the call, was always there for her, but she kept herself tightly under control. Charlotte could control herself, when she wanted to. She knew when to get out of the situation if it became too much for her and, other than her newborn years, had never taken a human she hadn't planned on drinking anyway.

The trio was halfway back down the main thoroughfare of the town when Bella stiffened. She could smell him before she heard his whispering footsteps. Rose and Charlotte stopped, fearing the worst, but as soon as they caught his scent, they relaxed.

"_Jasper_." Charlotte hissed.

"_What were you thinking!_" All three of them heard his quiet reply as he closed the distance between them. They turned around and waited for him to join them, all three females vibrating with anger. Jasper was scowling, obviously pissed about their little excursion.

"I'm fine." Bella ground out through gritted teeth.

"You may think so, Bella, but you never know when something is going to set you off."

"Oh, like my birthday?" She knew it was a low blow, but she was sick and tired of him trying to control her. She may have been a newborn vampire, but she was not a child and refused to be treated as such. Bella knew she had no desire for the human blood pulsing around her and they were in no danger from her. The fact that Jasper refused to trust her own instincts pissed her off.

"Exactly." He hissed. "If it could happen to me after decades of learning to control myself, what makes you think you're infallible after a matter of mere months?" He had gripped her upper arms, intent on getting her out of the middle of town by force. Jasper had been furious to find out where the three of them had gone. Carlisle and Peter both seemed to be confident in Bella's ability to control herself and had let Charlotte and Rose take her to town. Even if it was time to test Bella's control, it should have been he and Carlisle, or Emmett, who had taken her. If she lost control, Bella's newborn strength would be too much for Rose or Charlotte, and they wouldn't be able to stop her.

Furious, Bella jerked her arms out of Jasper's grip and stepped backwards out of his reach. She was so wrapped up in the confrontation with him, that she didn't realize there was someone standing behind her and she bumped into the girl, knocking her over. The three older vampires tensed immediately, but Bella whirled around and helped her up.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there. Are you okay?" The words left her mouth a little faster than human speed, but the girl gave her a small smile and nodded. Bella felt Jasper's hands grip her upper arms again and it only pissed her off even further. "Would you leave me alone!" She growled. The girl in front of her was startled. "I'm sorry, my friend here can't seem to keep his hands off of me. Again, I'm very sorry."

"No problem." The girl squeaked out, before looking down at her hands. Bella followed her gaze and it all clicked. She had scraped her palms on the concrete and was bleeding. That was why Jasper had her in a death grip. Bella immediately stopped breathing and turned back around to her three friends who seemed to be in shock.

"Are you ready to go now?" Bella asked with the last of her breath. She felt no pull towards the blood welling up in the girl's wounds, but did not want to take any chances.

Rose, Charlotte, and Bella linked arms again and Jasper stayed right on Bella's heels as they walked back to Peter's truck. The girls sandwiched Bella between them once again and Jasper hopped in the bed of the truck. He'd ran all the way from the house, wanting to get there as quickly as possible just in case something had happened. His mind was reeling from what he had just witnessed. Never before had he seen such a young vampire have no reaction to fresh human blood. It didn't even phase Bella, though the rest of them scented it as soon as the girl's skin had been broken. Jasper's throat had erupted in flames immediately, but she didn't even flinch. Of course Alice had been right. Bella was going to be an extraordinary vampire. He remembered the times his wife would share her visions with him. Especially the ones Edward didn't want to know about. The ones pertaining to Bella as a vampire. He fought so hard to keep her human, even giving her up, but it was always futile. It was her fate. No matter what choices he made, Alice's visions never wavered in that one aspect. The circumstances may have changed, but she always knew that one day Bella would be one of their kind.

The ride home was quiet. No one really knew what to say. Carlisle was waiting for them on the front porch as they pulled up. Jasper hopped out of the back of the truck before it had even stopped and took off into the woods. Carlisle watched him go, before turning his attention back to the three females. Bella's eyes were still golden and no one appeared to be disheveled.

"Well?" He prompted.

"Alice was right, but when did we ever bet against her?" Rose shrugged with a wry smile. "Her control rivals your own, Carlisle."

Esme flitted out of the house and stood beside Carlisle, who was smiling slightly. "What happened?" She asked.

"Bella." Charlotte prompted her.

"Nothing happened. We walked through town, and it didn't bother me. There was no urge to suck them dry." Bella explained nonchalantly. Carlisle's eyes twinkled with pride.

"I'm so glad, Bella. This will be much easier for you if you don't have to deal with the blood lust." Carlisle offered his praise, but Peter and Emmett drowned out his words with their whoops of excitement.

"That's my baby sister!" Emmett exclaimed as he high-fived Peter. Rose rolled her eyes and greeted him with a kiss. Peter joined the group and stood grinning between Charlotte and Bella with an arm around each other them.

Everyone had been so excited over the news that they didn't notice Jasper had joined them again until he spoke. "She didn't tell you how she knocked over a human girl and then didn't even flinch when her hands started to bleed not even two feet away from her?" He was leaning up against Peter's truck, his arms crossed over his chest.

All eyes were on Bella once again, wide and incredulous. "Really?" Carlisle breathed.

She shrugged and averted her gaze. "Yeah."

"Not even a year old and she isn't phased by a human bleeding right in front of her face." Jasper muttered mostly to himself, before straightening up and addressing Carlisle. "So Alice was right. Bella is amazing. Can we go home now?"

The mood shifted quickly and everyone scowled at the empath.

"We were planning on leaving tomorrow, Jasper." Carlisle tried to placate the agitated vampire. "But if everyone is ready and agrees, I don't see why we can't leave a little early." He directed his questioning gaze to Bella. Carlisle had some idea what was bothering Jasper, but Bella was his main priority right now. He cared for the girl and didn't want to push her. If she wasn't ready, they would wait.

"Sure, I'll just go pack." Bella shrugged and headed into the house, shooting a curious look back at Jasper. She couldn't figure out what she had done wrong this time, other than going to town with Rose and Charlotte without him knowing. But he was _not_ her keeper and if she wanted to go somewhere, she didn't need his permission. His domineering behavior was starting to piss her off.

Peter followed her into the house. "He's a good guy, Bella, just give him a chance to work through his shit."

She gave him a dubious look. "I know. Alice wouldn't have been with him if he wasn't. I'm just tired of him treating me like a child. It was bad enough with Ed..Edward." She stuttered over his name, choking back the emotions brought up by talking about them. "But, I was human then, and I can understand his need to protect me. He loved me...or at least he said he did." Bella mumbled as she packed the small amount of clothes she'd managed to accrue in the short time she'd been there. "Jasper just wants to control every little thing I do, and I'm fed up with it!" She tried to close the zipper on the bag, but it was stuck. When she pulled harder, she only managed to rip the tab off the zipper. Growling, she flopped on the bed next to the bag.

Peter chuckled to himself, not wanting to set her off. He grasped what remained of the zipper and closed the bag for her. "Like I said, he's got a lot of shit to sort through. You have to understand that for over a century he was a leader and commander of armies. It's just in his nature to want to take control of a situation. Right now he's feeling weak and out of control because he wasn't able to protect Alice. I'm afraid he's becoming quite possessive and controlling of you to compensate for what he considers his greatest failure." He paused before wrapping his arms around her and pulling her against him. Her back was to his chest and he rested his head on her shoulder. "You should also know that he blames himself for everything that happened." Bella opened her mouth to object, but he continued. "He feels that if he had been able to control himself better on the night of your birthday, that none of this would have been set into motion. Now that you seem to be immune to the blood lust that consumes most of our kind, he's feeling even more insecure. After decades of living Carlisle's lifestyle, he still struggles. Then you come along and it doesn't even phase you when a human starts bleeding right next to you."

"Is that what all that was about out there?" She asked as understanding dawned on her.

Peter nodded against her shoulder. "Give him some time, and definitely don't put up with any of his shit, little one." He nipped at her exposed neck. "We're going to miss you around here."

"I'll miss you and Charlotte too." Bella whispered, laying her head back on his shoulder.

"Promise me, if you need anything you'll call?"

"Promise."

"Good, now lets go say goodbye to Char." Peter smacked Bella on the ass as they got up, making her yelp in surprise. He laughed and tucked her under his arm as he slung her bag over his shoulder.

Peter and Charlotte had been alone together for a long time. Having Bella around had been refreshing. He couldn't deny the feelings the little one had brought out in the two of them and they'd do anything to protect her, even from his old friend who was being a complete ass. Peter knew Jasper best, and even when Jasper didn't say a word, Peter always knew exactly when something was bothering his maker, and usually knew _what_ it was was as well. He'd always known Jasper was destined for better things than leading Maria's army and his old friend had come so far since their early days. Whatever Jasper was going through now, Bella would help him get through. They would help each other heal, but they had a rough road ahead of them. It was the just the beginning for those two, and he'd miss them.


	10. Chapter 10

The loud crash from Bella's room caused everyone in the house to come running. They stopped at the door for a moment, taking in the scene. Her large bookcase had been pulled over and paper fluttered everywhere from the books she had destroyed. Bella was pacing the room with her hands shoved in her hair, a continuous growl rumbling in her chest.

Carlisle gave a meaningful look to Jasper and he nodded, sending out a wave of calm into the room. Bella stopped pacing and abruptly turned to face the slew of vampires in her doorway. She glared at the blonde empath as her hands balled into fists. He wasn't getting past her shield today.

"Bella?" Carlisle addressed her in his most soothing voice. "What's wrong, dear?" The last thing he wanted was for her to lose all control inside the house. He still wasn't sure how powerful her shield could be and didn't want to risk reducing the structure to rubble.

She knew she was out of control and struggled to calm herself down since Jasper couldn't reach her. Bella had spent merely a month in the Cullen's home as an immortal and was already quite disenchanted with her existence. Nothing could hold her interest for long and there was way too much damn time to fill. She understood perfectly now how they all held multiple degrees, spoke several languages fluently, and mastered hundreds of other skills. There was so much damn time. Bella had tried, but it only made her agitated and restless. Her newborn status kept the family holed up in a remote area of Manitoba and never had anyone felt cabin fever like Isabella Swan, or Arabella Benefici as her official documents now named her.

Whatever emotions Bella thought she had worked through had fallen to the wayside. She was angry and bitter at the hand fate had dealt her. She'd wanted this life, and even if she hadn't realized exactly what it all entailed, she would have had it with Edward. She would have had a mate to share every moment with. As it stood, she was desperately alone and couldn't bear to think of living the next few years like this, let alone decades or centuries. It was agonizing to even consider.

She still felt the aching hole in her chest when she thought of him, and sweet Alice. Her dear best friend would never have let her suffer like this. She would have made sure Bella kept busy, and even if that meant an eternity of shopping, it was better than the hell she was currently embroiled in. Bella understood so much more now of what Edward had tried to tell her.

She had tried to fill her endless hours with all kinds of things, but found nothing to be passionate about. There was chess with Carlisle, which usually included lengthy discussions about all manner of topics. She helped Esme in the greenhouse they built, growing plants from seed, whenever her inexperience didn't damage the seedlings that is. Emmett shared his love for video games, commiserating when she broke more than a couple controllers. Apparently, he still broke them from time to time as well. He was always eager to go hunting with her, which eased her fears about burdening the family because she needed a babysitter. Rose surprised Bella with her love of all things music and had begun teaching Bella how to play the piano. Her singular motivation was to be able to play the pieces Edward had written for her and Esme, never wanting to forget the love he had poured into those compositions. They also had their typical girly moments where Rose schooled her in the acts of beautification, but there was no point. There was no one to look pretty for, and Bella couldn't find it in her to care. Jasper continued to keep his distance, but she knew the boxes of books she found outside her door every now and then were some kind of peace offering from him. They still couldn't communicate without misunderstandings and misspoken words. She did enjoy the books, and was glad they were nothing of importance because the pages were easily ripped by fingers that still had a difficult time knowing their strength.

Even with everyone's effort to include her in their activities on a daily basis, she was still left to her own devices a majority of the time. She was merely going through the motions, and it was tedious and stifling. Some days she didn't know how she could go on. Today was one of those days.

"I can't do this." The words left her mouth in a snarl.

"Do what?" Esme asked.

"This!" She gestured at herself. "How? How do you go on? How did you survive alone for so long, Carlisle? I feel like I'm going to go insane and it's only been a year. I can't do this forever!"

"Bella, calm down." Carlisle tried to persuade her.

"I used to love reading, but now the thought of another book makes me ill. It was nice to escape to all these little fictional worlds before. Now when I'm done with a book, I realize it's only been an hour and I still have twenty-three more to fill up. And that's just for the day!" She raised her weary gaze to meet the eyes of her family members. "It doesn't matter how many activities you find for me to engage in, there is always more time waiting for me. I don't know what to do. When he spoke of endless nights, I never truly understood just how lonely he must have been, until now. How did he do this for so long?" Bella dropped her eyes to the floor as she ran out of steam, feeling utterly defeated by her circumstances.

Sorrow spread through the family as they remembered Edward's decades alone. They ached knowing that Bella was now experiencing something similar.

"You're not alone, Bella." Esme tried to placate her. Bella's incredulous look was expected. They knew exactly what she meant.

The fight had completely left Bella. She sighed and shook her head, before setting about cleaning up the mess she had created. Her embarrassment over her outburst was clearly felt by one member of the family, and as the rest of them faded away from the room, he stepped forward and joined her in her efforts.

They didn't speak, but it was the start of something. Jasper's quiet solidarity reminded her subtly that there was someone else who understood what she was going through.

~~**~~

"Bella, take a walk with me?" Carlisle peeked his head into her room. She unfolded herself gracefully from the chair she had been sitting in for the past thirty-two hours and followed him silently out of the house.

They walked in silence as the sun neared the horizon, painting the clouds with luminous colors. She'd once taken joy in beautiful sunsets like these, but they were painful reminders of yet another day passing without Edward by her side.

"Shall we hunt?" He asked, studying her intensely for a moment and deciding she really didn't need to feed as often as they were making her.

"I'd rather not." Bella replied, her arms folded across her chest as her gaze wandered over the trees that appeared as nothing more than black shadows as the sun dipped behind them.

Carlisle took a seat on an exposed boulder and waited for her to join him. It pained him to see his newest daughter so unhappy. He knew better than anyone how achingly lonely this life could be, and losing his first companion, his son, was as devastating to him as it had been for her.

He was a patient man, and eventually Bella made her way over to him and raised an eyebrow in anticipation of whatever conversation it was he wanted to have with her. "I owe you many apologies, Bella." He began. "But I will never apologize for encouraging Edward in his pursuit of you, because you were the best thing to ever happen to him – whether you believe that or not. I _am_ sorry that your choice was taken away and now you are left to suffer in this life. The sheer expanse of time that stretches before us is unfathomable. It has only been a year for you, and I know it seems like an eternity, but eventually the days blend into weeks, and then into years, and so on. It is difficult, in the beginning, to face each day exactly the same as you did the day before. There is no sleep to escape to, and you won't wake up a day older. You won't gain or lose weight. You'll never know the feeling of life growing within your womb or the feel of your child's hand engulfed in your own. Your appearance will never change. You won't grow old or become ill. You will never again sweat from the summer heat or shiver from the winter's chill. There are millions of mundane things humans have to worry about on a day to day basis. Their survival depends on it. But we are no longer human. The only part left of us that can grow and be nurtured is our intelligence. It is especially difficult in the beginning because you are still used to all these human concerns. Your mental capacity was limited and there was always something to occupy it. Really, the only thing your body needs now is to hunt, and that can be relegated to an hour per week. As a human, you'd spend easily an hour per _day_ just preparing and consuming the food you needed to survive. Add that to eight hours each day for sleep, thirty minutes for all your bathroom activities, and another eight to ten hours devoted to school or work. That doesn't leave a lot of free time. Now you have nothing _but_ time. It's a difficult adjustment, and I'm not sure any of us ever adjust completely."

He paused and watched her for a moment. Bella was absorbing everything he said as she stared intently at the ground, a small crease still formed between her brows when she was concentrating on something. Carlisle found it endearing. Edward, Esme, and Rosalie each carried over some gesture or expression from their human lives. It was strangely comforting to see the continuity, knowing that not all their humanity was lost during the change.

"It _will_ get easier. But I know that's not what you want to hear. It's quite cliché." He chuckled. "You have to find something you are passionate about. There is always your education, to begin with. You could finish high school remotely and get your diploma, and almost all colleges offer online courses these days. With your control, you might even be able to attend a college in the next couple years if you wanted to wait for that experience. If that is not a route you'd like to take, we will fully support you in any hobby you'd like to try your hand at. The sky is the limit in that regard given our financial status and abilities."

Carlisle took a deep breath, before continuing. "There is not much I can do to help ease your loneliness. I learned that with Edward. No matter how much he involved himself, there was still something missing. You will, no doubt, experience the same thing. We pretty much have only our own family for companionship, with the occasional visit from friends and others of our kind. I cannot, in good conscience, allow our family to befriend another human as we did with you. We cannot risk the exposure or the wrath of the Volturi. They are watching us closely, and will take action should we slip at all." His expression hardened as he thought of the methods their so-called leaders were using now to exert their power. Something had to be done, and soon. "I can't guarantee you will escape the loneliness that plagues you now. I can only assure you that we are here for you and will do everything in our power to make this life more bearable for you. I know it's not much, but it is all I can offer."

Bella looked up at him then. His gazes sympathetic and understanding as he rested a hand on her shoulder. Unfathomable sadness lingered in her golden eyes and he couldn't help the regret that he had brought another unhappy soul into this life. She was so pure and selfless, so much like his son. He hoped some day they would move past this and forge a bond as deep as the one he had shared with Edward. One day he hoped to see the life shining in her once again.

"You can travel the world, Isabella. See things no human has ever laid eyes on. There are wonders out there that only our kind can experience. There are caves, both underwater and high in the mountains, that are unreachable to humans. I can show you cave paintings that date back tens of thousands of years and have never been cataloged. There are animals tucked away in remote deserts and forests that have never been recorded. Just say the word and we'll go. I'll take you anywhere, show you anything. We'll hunt lions in the savannahs of Africa, or tigers in the mountains of Siberia. We can tour the libraries and museums of the world and study rare texts and ancient artifacts. You can explore the Khumbu Glacier or climb Mount Everest in Nepal. You can try your hand at cliff diving again off Nanga Parbat in the Himalayas."

She winced at his reference to the catalyst for this whole mess. _If she had never jumped... If she had just waited for Jake..._

Carlisle wrapped an arm around her, immediately sensing his mistake. "I'm sorry." He whispered. She nodded in acceptance of his apology.

"The world lies at your feet, sweet girl. Find something to live for, and I'll do everything in my power to give it to you."

Bella rested her head against Carlisle's chest, allowing herself to be soothed by the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest as he breathed unnecessarily. She didn't realize how much she needed her father, until she didn't have him any longer. She never knew how much she would miss Charlie. At least she had Carlisle now.

~~**~~

He watched her from the large window in his bedroom that overlooked the backyard where she had lain for five days without moving. Jasper wanted nothing more than to go to her and comfort her, but every effort he'd made had turned into some kind of argument or misunderstanding. Bella had not moved since the day she returned from her excursion with Carlisle. After the second day of her downtime, Carlisle explained what they had talked about and that he was sure she was just taking time to think about what she might like to do with her life. He couldn't hide his worry from Jasper. The truth was that everyone worried about Bella. They remembered all too well how tortured Edward had been, and feared the same fate, if not worse, for their newest family member. Edward had never found love until Bella crossed his path, but Bella...Bella had lost her mate and best friend...and nothing could erase that kind of pain.

The sliding of the back door caught his attention, and the accompanying determination and annoyance told him it was Rosalie before she even came into view. He groaned internally, knowing what was about to happen. His sister didn't take the gentlest approach when it came to dealing with others. Sometimes that was exactly what the recipient needed, but he felt protective of the girl who was about to be on the receiving end of Rose's wrath and wanted to stop her before she started in on Bella.

"Enough is enough, Bella! You are being pathetic. Get your ass up and quit moping around. We all lost Edward and Alice, but we have to go on with our lives, and so do you!"

Bella slowly looked at Rose, before returning her gaze to the bright blue sky.

Rose huffed and moved to stand over Bella, blocking her view. "None of us asked for this life. Oh wait, yes you did! So, you got your wish, now get up and get on with it."

"Fuck you." The words flew out of Bella's mouth.

Rose smiled at the fact that she got a response from her. "No thanks, that's what I've got Emmett for, but I appreciate the offer."

"Yeah, no shit, Rose." She sneered. "It's not like I can't hear you two getting it on like rabid monkeys every night...and most of the day. Would it kill you to have a little restraint?"

"It's okay, you'll get used to it." Rose shrugged.

"Maybe I don't want to get used to it Rose!" Bella leapt to her feet. "Did it ever cross your pretty little mind that some of us lost our mates and listening to our so-called brother and sister going at it all the time might be a little uncomfortable? A little painful? Did you ever stop to think about anyone other than yourself?"

"You can't expect us to stop everything because of what happened, Bella. It's been a year. It's time to move on."

"You have no idea what it's like, Rose. Don't even go there."

"You think I don't know what it's like? I never wanted this life. I was meant to die that night and now I'm trapped in this unchanging body for eternity!"

"Well at least you don't have go through it alone. You just went out and found yourself a mate as soon as possible. Try losing Emmett and then come talk to me or Jasper. I may be new to this life, but he not only has to listen to you, but he has to _feel_ it too. Ever think about that?" Rose stood gaping at Bella with her mouth open. She actually had not considered that. Of course there were no secrets in their house, but after a while you learn to tune it out. Rose never thought about how it might affect Jasper, and since Bella and Edward were never intimate, she didn't think it would matter. "You know that's why I never wanted to come back here. It was stupid to think I'd ever fit in with this family."

Bella turned to walk away, but Rose tried to stop her. "Bella, wait.."

"I don't want to hear it. You've always had everything handed to you on a silver platter. It was a mistake to think we could ever really be sisters." She whispered before heading into the woods.

Jasper was seconds behind her, and Rose called out to him as he passed her.

"Not now Rose."

She wasn't running, she just wanted to be alone. It was too much, being here with his family. She knew it would be. Bella was constantly being watched and pitied. She'd been trying to think of what she could do in this life that would bring her any kind of happiness, but memories of Edward invaded every waking moment. She missed having someone to talk to. She wanted Alice.

Bella stopped and turned around, waiting for Jasper. He always followed her and sure enough a second later he was leaning against a tree a hundred feet away from her. She waited for him to lay into her since it seemed everyone was having a turn these days. Jasper had been strangely quiet around her as of late and while she was glad she didn't have to argue with him or listen to his lectures, she did miss just talking to him.

"I appreciate your concern for me Bella, but we can't expect them to stay celibate for the rest of eternity." He spoke quietly. The truth was that it _was_ difficult for him to deal with all the amorous emotions in the house. It only reminded him of Alice and what he no longer had. It reminded him of the eternity he faced without her. At night it left him hard and panting and incredibly unsatisfied.

"I know." She mumbled. "She just rubs me the wrong way. I have no idea how you all put up with each other for so long. I feel like I'm going mad."

He moved closer to her, until there were only a couple feet between them. "It will get easier."

She snorted. "That's what everyone keeps saying." She wrapped her arms around her torso just like she did when she was human. "I told you I didn't want to come back here yet."

"I know. It's harder than I thought it would be." He admitted.

Her head whipped up, her narrowed eyes searching his face for the truth.

"I spent a hundred years walking this earth before I found Alice. I know how lonely it can be, even when surrounded by others. Rose may not be happy with this life, but she's never had to go through what me, or Carlisle, or you have. She means well, but she can't possibly understand how much bleaker this existence could be. She's always had Emmett. We're facing eternity without the ones we loved most and there is just no comparison."

He gently grasped her arm. "Even so, it's going to have to be something we learn to live with. No matter how much it hurts. We can't ask them to stop loving each other because of us. It's true, they could tone it down a bit, but they've always been this way. I don't see it changing any time soon." He chuckled humorlessly, his thumb absently stroking her arm. "What do you say we give them their space. Just me and you, going out and getting away from the house whenever their nightly activities start up? Would that help?"

Bella smiled. He was momentarily dazzled by the sight because he hadn't seen a true smile from her since her eighteenth birthday.

"Do you think we can get along well enough to actually do that?" She asked, one eyebrow arching delicately.

"We can try." Jasper shrugged.

"Then, yes, I think that might help. Nights are the hardest because they want to be with each other. The loneliness is more intense then. Sitting alone, in my room, listening to everyone else...it's not fair, Jasper. They stole them from us!" Her voice had gained a hard edge.

Jasper let his gift calm them both. "It's not, and one day they will pay." He promised.

She relaxed her jaw and stopped grinding her teeth as she let him calm her.

"Truce?" He asked playfully, holding his arms out for her.

Bella nodded warily, but stepped into his embrace. The moment his arms closed around her, she felt her worries melt away. She missed Edward's embrace. Carlisle and Esme hugged her regularly, but this was different. Trying to be discreet, she inhaled, taking in his scent. She felt him do the same. The two of them had never been so close. Though she was now made the same as him, her arms felt warmer, softer somehow. He hadn't held a woman in his arms since Alice and the soft curves and feminine scent was something he had missed. Jasper had never been an affectionate person, but he could get used to this. Bella's head tucked just under his chin and her small frame felt fragile in his arms. It was nice to finally be able to hug her without fearing for her life.

Her arms loosened slightly, and he took it as a sign to end their embrace. She stepped back, her head bowed, and he knew she would be blushing if she could.

"I should apologize to Rose. I said some awful things." Bella finally broke the silence.

He nodded, having felt how much Bella's words had hurt Rose. "That can wait for tomorrow. The sun is setting, and I'm afraid she's going to be otherwise occupied for the next eight to ten hours." Bella watched as the sun glinted off his blond hair and a sliver of skin on his forehead shimmered in the fading light. "Why don't we hunt? It's been almost a week for you." He suggested, evaluating the color of her eyes and the deep purple bruises under them.

"Yeah, I should hunt." She agreed.

He jerked his head to the east where a moose was crashing it's way through the trees and they took off to find something to sate their thirst.

After hunting and cleaning up in the river, the two lost souls sat and talked until the sky began to lighten. It was the first of many nights they would spend together, away from the house and the lovers inside.

Tomorrow, Bella would apologize to Rose. She would ask Carlisle for help with her gift, and she would spend some time with Emmett and Esme. Things wouldn't magically improve overnight, but it was a start. She had an eternity to look forward to, and though she would never forget the ones she lost, she would have to move on.


	11. Chapter 11

"Try again, Bella." Eleazar commanded.

She nodded at Jasper and closed her eyes. His soothing calm seeped into her, and she was able to relax. Which was hard to do, knowing what came next.

Then there it was – blinding rage and fear. Her eyes flew open and her body crouched instinctively. Once again, Emmett was sent flying through the air.

Bella hung her head in frustration. While she had mastered the ability to raise and lower her mental shield, there were still many other aspects of her gift that she needed to learn and explore. Her physical shield could be a great asset or hindrance, depending on whether she could learn to control it or not. At the moment, she had absolutely no control over it. As soon as she was angry enough or felt threatened, it flew out and protected her from anyone within a fifty foot radius.

Once Bella had approached Carlisle and asked for help with her gift, it was a matter of minutes before he was on the phone with his friend Eleazar. He had once been a member of the Volturi Guard and had a gift for recognizing special abilities in others. Further illustrating the point that a life of immortality meant years upon years of utter boredom, Eleazar eagerly agreed to fly out immediately, along with Carmen, his wife and mate. Carmen was such a warm, maternal soul, much like Esme, and Bella immediately felt at ease with her. Eleazar was so much like Carlisle, you'd think they shared DNA. Their thirst for knowledge and excitement for experimenting, meant Bella was now their newest project. They worked together to try to figure out the intricacies of her gift. The two of them could often be found with their heads together deep in discussion. Esme and Carmen simply shook their heads, smiling fondly at their mates, and went on about their own business.

She spent at least 12 hours a day working with Eleazar. Everyone else helped as much as they could, but it was mostly Jasper and Emmett. Jasper, being the only other one in the family with a gift, could gauge the level of her shield and help manipulate her emotions in order to get a reaction. Emmett just thought it was cool that Bella could throw him hundreds of feet into a tree without touching him. Carlisle and Eleazar kept coming up with new ways to test her abilities and tried to find some way to help her find the _switch_, so to speak. They all hoped it would happen soon, especially since she was past her newborn year. Her emotions should be more stable now and her gift was tied directly to her emotional state.

Jasper was happy with the progress Bella had already made. After the first day, she could keep her mental shield down, even when her emotions took over. Being able to gauge her mood at all times made him much more comfortable around her and helped with her training. For instance, he could tell that she was about five minutes away from blowing a fuse, frustrated as ever at going another day with no progress. He caught Eleazar's eye.

"Alright, Bella, that's enough for today." He patted her on the back and she growled. "Don't fret, little one, it will come to you soon enough."

"You wanna go?" Jasper murmured in her ear and she nodded, throwing him a grateful smile.

The two of them had fallen into a less hostile friendship since they started their nighttime excursions. The hours they spent together talking helped them understand each other better. As they got to know each other on a friendly level, they found the other easier to read. Jasper had the additional benefit of being able to tell what she was feeling, but Bella insisted that his eyes gave everything away, even when he was trying not to project. In a short time, they'd developed their own form of communication, and misunderstandings were fewer and far between. He knew what set her off, and refrained from pushing those buttons when he could. However, Jasper had an alpha personality and was used to being in control, so it was difficult for him to completely abandon that part of him. Bella had made herself perfectly clear that she was not a little girl who needed constant supervision. She was more than capable of taking care of herself and would not tolerate Jasper being an overbearing asshole, as she so eloquently put it.

Despite the tragedies she'd faced, Bella had a fire within her that he appreciated. At first he despised her strong will and stubborn demeanor, but now it was almost endearing. Alice had been quite the spitfire as well. He remembered, with fondness, how explosive their relationship had been in the beginning. It was not unlike the one he shared now with Bella. Alice had been so sure of him, and so sure of the Cullens when she approached him in that diner. She was giving him a new future, something he desperately needed. However, it was not love at first sight for either of them. He was a military man, used to being in control and having his orders followed without question. Alice, because of her precognitive abilities, insisted they do things her way. She did nothing but aggravate him in the beginning. He was a quiet man and she didn't stop talking. He liked to sit back and relax and she was constantly on the go. Not much changed through the years, but they learned to live with each other and a deep seated love took root between them. Now he didn't really know how to live without her. He was a little lost. Watching over Bella gave his life purpose once more, even if his attention was unwanted sometimes. He liked to think that they were becoming friends, and maybe a certain amount of trust was developing between them.

Bella won the race to their rock. They met there each night, often racing for fun. Bella liked to stretch her legs, and Jasper had missed racing his brothers. Edward was always the fastest, so there was little point to trying to beat him, unless Jasper used his powers and made him drop in a fit of giggles or from exhaustion. Emmett always preferred wrestling because he was the slowest of them all, and he had more fun trying to trip up everyone else rather than actually try to win. Carlisle was an evenly matched opponent, but he rarely joined in, preferring to spend his free time with Esme.

"Bella, I know you're frustrated with your lessons, but I was wondering if you'd be willing to try something for me?" He asked hesitantly, hoping not to set off her volatile temper.

She turned her head to look at him and smiled softly. "Sure, Jasper. Why didn't you say anything earlier?"

He shrugged. "I didn't want to interrupt. I think they forget I have experience working with newborns and their gifts. They seem to want to forget my past as much as I'd like to. However, I do have my own gift that I had to learn to control as well. In the life I chose to live with Alice and the Cullens, my abilities weren't very important. Other than calming people down every once in a while, they had little use for it."

"So what _can_ you do?" Her eyebrows lifted with intrigue.

Jasper chuckled. "You'd be surprised. There was a reason Maria chose me. She saw my potential and wanted to capitalize on that. Inciting a regiment of bloodthirsty newborn vampires into a murderous riot was at the top of my list, as was keeping them calm. Of course it's easier to manipulate someone in a one on one situation. I can persuade others to bend to my will, or drop an opponent with a burst of lethargy. Between Edward and I, we could get ourselves out of any trouble we found ourselves in, which was usually because we agreed to go along with one of Emmett's idiotic plans. It's a very useful gift to have, but when assimilating into a typical human life, there was rarely use for it." He smirked. "Until you came along, that is."

"What do you mean?" Bella asked him.

"I think by now you understand the monotony of our existence?" She nodded in confirmation. "Emotions among the family were pretty monotonous too. I always knew what to expect from each one of my family members, and their emotions rarely drifted outside of that baseline." Jasper looked Bella in the eye. "When you arrived, the emotional atmosphere of the entire family shifted drastically. Alice always tried to make the best of things, but once she saw you, she was filled with so many happy emotions, it was like a euphoric high for me. Everyone, save Rose, was suddenly happy and full of hope for Edward. Edward was always so serious, so morose, and though his self-loathing took on a new level, there were so many nicer emotions layered among the dour ones. It was honestly the best climate I'd ever experienced."

Bella dropped her eyes. Her cheeks would have been stained pink if she were still human. She had spent plenty of time convincing herself that her presence made no difference in the lives of the Cullens. After they'd abruptly picked up and left with not so much as a single goodbye, her worst fears were confirmed. She considered herself merely a distraction for the family, for the lone Cullen, and eventually she no longer held any interest for any of them. Even to this day, it was difficult for her to believe they truly thought of her as one of their own.

Bella was looking through the trees now, as she often did when memories overtook her. There was an innate sadness there now that mirrored Jasper's own feelings. Once he realized the direction their thoughts were turning, he remembered the point of the discussion. Helping Bella discover her gift had been a great distraction to them both.

"So, I was wondering if you wanted to try something?" He asked her, effectively snapping her out of her reverie.

"Right. Sure." Bella agreed, putting her trust in Jasper.

"I think Eleazar and Carlisle have been going about this the wrong way. Alice and Edward's abilities were both mental and required a more intellectual approach in order to learn to control them, and even then it wasn't entirely possible to do. Edward learned to tune out what he heard, but he could never really turn it off. Alice couldn't turn her visions on or off at will, and virtually had no control over what she could see. However, my gift works differently, and I believe yours does too." He paused and shifted himself to face her. "Obviously, my gift is an emotional one, and I believe yours is as well. In the beginning, I was constantly projecting whatever I was feeling personally. If I got angry, it bled over into the newborns surrounding me and we'd end up in one big battle to the death. So, I had to learn quickly to keep my emotions to myself. Then, once I managed that, I learned that if I concentrated on the emotion I wanted to project, I could feel it welling up inside of me, filling me. I would visualize it all coming to a point right here." He pointed to a spot on his forehead, known to many as the third eye. "Then once I was focused, I would release all that energy towards my target. The other aspect of my gift, is much like Edward's. I could always feel what everyone around me was feeling, but I learned to tune it out. Your mental shield is similar. It's default position is up, instinctively protecting yourself, but you've learned how to control it so you can manipulate it at will. It takes some concentration to keep it lowered, but you'll find that it gets easier through the years."

"You think I should try to keep it lowered?" Bella's eyebrows knitted together, the familiar wrinkle forming between them.

"Well..." Jasper was at a loss for words. He had been thinking about his own comfort, and not Bella's. If he were to look at the situation objectively, then he would realize the shield was a great asset for Bella to have. It would protect her from those of their kind who would use their gifts against her. It was his own selfishness in wanting to know what she was feeling at all times that made him think otherwise. "Well, no. There's no reason for you to keep it lowered if it's not bothering you. It's probably a good thing to just let it be, as you never know when you might run into someone who wants to use their own gifts on you."

She nodded, and then a sly smile crept appeared. "You don't like not being able to feel me do you?"

Bella had always been exceptionally observant for a human, and that trait was still apparent in vampire form. Jasper shook his head, a wry smile of his own crossing his lips. "I've never met anyone before that I couldn't read. It's a bit uncomfortable, if I'm being honest."

"Well, like I told Edward once upon a time – now you know what it's like to be the rest of us." They both chuckled softly before Bella froze. Jasper felt her guilt immediately.

"Bella, he'd want this. He'd want you to be able to look back at you memories of him with fondness and not pain. It's okay to laugh, you aren't betraying him." His large hand rested on her petite shoulder and she allowed him to comfort her.

Bella sucked in a deep breath and nodded. "You're right."

Jasper waited a few minutes for her to collect herself and then he returned to the subject at hand. "So, I wanted to try something with your physical shield." He hedged. She cocked her head to the side and gave him her full attention. "What do you feel when it happens?"

Bella shook her head. "It's all so fast and unexpected. It's hard to tell."

Jasper placed his hands over hers. "Bella, you're a vampire now. You have perfect recall, so you need to think back to when it happened and remember what you felt."

He smirked at the scowl on her face.

"It was like a bubble." She said finally. "It just welled up inside of me and expanded like a bubble before popping."

Jasper nodded, pleased that they were getting somewhere. He could have said something in front of Eleazar, but didn't want to contradict the elder vampire in front of the family. He also felt that Bella would be more comfortable trying something new in a more private setting. She'd never liked being the center of attention, even going so far as to refuse to celebrate her own birthday. If only Alice hadn't pushed...

He snapped himself out of it and set out to explain his idea to Bella. "Can you remember blowing bubbles as a human, Bella?" Her brow furrowed in confusion but she nodded. "That's what you need to visualize. Come here." Jasper moved away from their rock to a small clearing and Bella followed.

"Now, I want you to take a deep breath, and then slowly let it out as if you were blowing a bubble. Picture the bubble in your mind. See it expanding slowly around you. Try it and let's see where that gets us."

Bella gave Jasper a curious look, but then steadied herself to try his suggestion. Closing her eyes, she sucked in a deep breath. Then pursing her lips, she imagined the resistance of the bubble solution as she started to blow out slowly but steadily. In her mind she saw a bubble expanding around her. Incredibly, she felt the tension of the physical shield pushing outwards and opened her eyes, gasping excitedly. In her break of concentration, the bubble popped and the force made Jasper stumble backwards a bit. The grin on his face was huge.

"That's it." He exclaimed with a whoop. "You felt that, right?" Jasper gripped her upper arms as he nearly vibrated with excitement.

"Yes, Jasper, I felt it." She felt her own self swelling with hope.

"Try again!" He backed away slightly and rubbed his hands together.

Bella shook her head at his enthusiasm and started the process once more. This time when she felt the tension of the bubble expanding, she remained calm and concentrated on expanding it steadily without popping it.

"Okay, stop." Jasper whispered, trying not to startle her. He could feel the wall of the bubble pushing against his outstretched hand. It was impenetrable. It was like an invisible wall. "Hold it there as long as you can, Bella." He pushed at it slowly and punched it quickly, trying to see if he could break through it, but he couldn't. "Okay, can you pull it back in without letting it go?"

Bella breathed in slowly, and he felt the bubble recede slightly, but then he was shoved backwards as it gave way. The look on her face was pained. "Sorry, Jasper." She whispered.

Jasper flashed to her side. "You don't have to apologize. You're doing so good. This is an amazing gift and I'm thrilled that you're learning to control it. You're amazing, Bella. I've never seen one so young with such control." He gave her a warm smile as he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, and then retracted his hand quickly when he realized how intimate the gesture seemed.

The air was suddenly awkward between them and Jasper cast about for something to say. "Why don't we take a break and pick back up with your normal practice tomorrow?" He suggested.

"Sure...and...thank you."

"For what, Bella?"

"For helping me. You really do have a way with others, and it's not just your gift." She curled her legs under her as she sat down on their rock. "I know we don't always get along, but I want you to know I appreciate everything you've done for me."

"You don't have to thank me. I've told you many times before that you are a part of this family, and you are worth it. We all look out for each other; that's what family is about."

"I know, but I don't want you to feel obligated to look after me..." Bella murmured.

"No, Bella, that's not it at all." She gave him an incredulous look and he had the good sense to look sheepish. "Okay, well, maybe in the beginning, but I do care about you. You are part of this family and I _want_ to help my sister. I'm not doing it because I feel obligated." He looked into her eyes so she could not doubt his sincerity.

Bella got the sudden urge to hug him and quickly wrapped her arms around his solid torso. She could tell her move surprised him and it was a moment before he returned the embrace. This was only the second time they had hugged and the physical contact was much needed by both of them. The only one Jasper ever touched regularly was Alice. He just didn't have that kind of relationship with any of the others. He wasn't the touchy feely type, despite his very emotional nature. From the time he was turned, he'd only touched another vampire when he needed to kill them or fuck them. The physical contact heightened his ability to read Bella, and the outpouring of affection filled a small space that had been empty too long. He let out a small sigh of satisfaction and they both relaxed a bit.

They were both started as they heard the unmistakable footsteps of another vampire running through the woods. They broke apart and Jasper instinctively pushed Bella behind him as he crouched, ready to defend them both. The scent the wind carried towards them was not one they recognized.

The unfamiliar vampire stopped several hundred feet away and raised his hands in a submissive gesture. His long, sandy colored hair was pulled back and his eyes were a startling ruby color. "I mean no harm. I am looking for the Cullen coven."

"Who are you?" Jasper voice was full of authority.

"Garrett." The rugged vampire stated. Jasper noted that his clothes were well worn and he was barefoot, most likely a nomad. "I am a friend to Carlisle."

Jasper nodded. "I have heard the name."

A throat cleared and Jasper realized he had been holding Bella's hip quite firmly in an effort to keep her behind him. He quickly loosened his grip and she stepped out from behind him. "I'm Bella." Garrett's eyes widened in recognition, and Jasper's suspicions rose.

"How do you know of her?" He demanded.

"I would much prefer to share my news with everyone at once. I promise you, I mean no harm to your mate."

Pain lanced through Jasper's entire body. He closed his eyes. "She's not..." He whispered.

Even Garrett could feel the pain radiating off the blond vampire. "My apologies for assuming. You must be Jasper." He stated, recognizing the telltale scars that littered the vampire's body.

Jasper nodded.

"Why don't we all head to the house. I'm sure Carlisle will be eager to hear the news." Bella spoke up and squeezed Jasper's bicep reassuringly.

She led the way, and Jasper kept himself between her and Garrett at all times. The sounds of three mated pairs enjoying the evening were unmistakable, and she realized they had no way to really warn them of their guest. Cell phone reception was rare that far out, so they relied on their land line for communication. Jasper and Bella exchanged a look as they heard Carlisle and Esme in the throes of passion, neither one wanting to interrupt at such a delicate time, but both slightly embarrassed to know exactly what was occurring between their parental figures. It had been different when Jasper was distracted by his own mate. He rarely had time to really think about what was going on between the others.

Jasper gestured silently towards the living room and the three of them sat and waited for the couples to finish. Once it was obvious they were finished, Jasper spoke everyone's name, alerting them to the visitor they probably already knew they had, but considering their focus was elsewhere, it was possible they didn't discern the third vampire's footsteps or scent.

Carlisle and Eleazar were the first to appear.

"Garrett!" Carlisle exclaimed. "It's good to see you again."

Garrett stood and they clasped hands. "You as well." He gave Carlisle a tight smile, which he did not miss. His expression changed immediately.

"Oh dear. You have news then?"

"Indeed. It's quite urgent." He greeted Eleazar with a handshake. "Eleazar."

"Garrett." He replied with a nod.

Esme and Carmen quickly joined them, followed by Emmett and Rosalie, although probably not as put together as they'd hoped to be. Esme wrung her hands and sat worriedly on the edge of the couch next to Bella. She frowned slightly and patted Bella's knee in hopes of comforting her.

Rose sauntered over to the chair with Emmett, seemingly unperturbed. She perched herself on the arm of it. Garrett nodded in greeting.

"I believe you know everyone else, and I'm assuming you met Jasper on your way in? He joined us in the fifties, with his mate Alice. And Bella is our newest daughter. Her mate was Edward."

"So, it's true then." Garrett stated. "They killed the visionary and the mind reader."

Carlisle nodded in affirmation, his lips stretched into a grim line.

"Then you need to know they are coming for the shield." He turned his red eyes to Bella.

Esme let out a gasp and Carlisle quickly strode across the floor to join her and Bella on the couch. "Nothing is going to happen, Bella. You have the entire family to protect you." He tried to reassure her, rubbing her back softly. To say the news was shocking, was an understatement. Bella wondered when this all would end. Why couldn't they leave her alone? They already took two of the most important people in her life. How many more lives would they ruin?

"Carlisle, they brought the entire guard."

Suddenly the room was suffocating. The seriousness of the situation was apparent to all of them.

"Jane?" Bella asked with a growl.

"Yes, everyone." Garrett confirmed. "They have been traveling across the United States interrogating any vampires they come across. I ran into Mary outside of Minneapolis and she told me Aro is on a mission. They are collecting again."

Carlisle growled and pounded his fist into his thigh, sparing Esme's furniture. Eleazar swore an oath in his native tongue.

"Collecting?" Rosalie asked. "What are they collecting?"

The patriarch took a deep, unnecessary breath. "Vampires, Rose. Aro is collecting any talented vampires he comes across. He always coveted Edward – saw him a prize to be won. He didn't even know about Alice until she went to Volterra." Carlisle and Jasper exchanged a look.

Eleazar turned to Jasper. "He'll want you, too. You are legendary among the southern vampires. I doubt you've escaped his radar."

"So, they're just taking vampires who happen to have gifts? How can they do that?" Rose was in full bitch mode now. Protecting her family was her number one priority. "They can't just take Jasper and Bella! We won't let them!"

Garrett chuckled and Rosalie turned her icy stare on him.

"Calm down, princess. It's obvious you have never encountered the full Volturi Guard. It's not a matter of you letting them do anything. You'll be lucky if _they_ let _you_ live."


	12. Chapter 12

Eleazar and Carlisle knew better than anyone in the room what it meant to have Aro collecting again. The idea that Aro thought he had the right to force vampires to either join his guard or die was infuriating to them both. He and his brothers may be the self-appointed leaders of the vampire world, but that did not give him the right to punish innocent vampires because he was desperate to maintain his throne. Eleazar was outraged for his dear friend and swore he would do whatever he could to help protect the remaining members of Carlisle's family.

"There was a time when I was a member of the Guard." Eleazar began. "I believed in upholding the laws and thought it was a good decision. As some of you know, I have the ability to sense gifts in others. I was a useful tool for Aro, and he used me in his acquisitions, often pardoning a vampire who had been brought before him if I sensed they might be a good addition to his collection." He spat the word. "I thought I was helping, but it was quickly apparent that the Volturi were not the benevolent rulers I thought them to be. They would bring in innocent vampires on trussed up charges simply because they coveted their gifts. It was disgusting and alarming to see so much power in their hands, knowing that they were unstoppable. The twins guarantee their supreme rule. No one has ever been able to get past their attack. Even if one could get past them, Renata is Aro's personal shield and a physical attack is impossible. You would simply find yourself diverted in another direction, not knowing what you were trying to do in the first place." Eleazar shook his head in disgust. "To think I helped them build this unstoppable army."

Carlisle clasped his shoulder. "We didn't know, brother. When we did know, we left. You are not to blame in this. You saved many vampires from being destroyed. As much as I hate to admit it, I'd much rather know Edward and Alice were alive as a part of their guard than to have had them destroyed." Eleazar nodded solemnly. They'd had this conversation before. They both shared guilt over their time with the Volturi.

"We cannot allow this to continue." Eleazar spoke with absolute conviction. "It is not right!"

Jasper's eyes faded to black as the righteous anger of the vampires in the room swirled around him, heightening his own outrage at the situation. "Well we have a chance now." He turned his obsidian eyes to the newest member of their coven. Bella met his eyes and they both remembered their vow of revenge. She nodded at his silent question. They would take out the Volturi.

The rest of the room watched their silent exchange, their curiosity piqued. They knew Bella was immune to Aro, Jane, and Demetri. She could escape unharmed, but that didn't mean the rest of them would be protected. Jasper had every faith that Bella could protect them all. He knew what her shields could do, and given more practice, she could defend their entire family against the Volturi's Guard. He knew now why Alice had been so sure of Bella's survival. He knew this was why his wife had given her life to protect the girl. Bella could save them all. Her last self-sacrificing act had been so they could live.

"I'm calling in the rest of the family." Carmen stated as she headed to Carlisle's study to use the phone. Eleazar kissed the top of her head and sent her on her way.

Carlisle turned his attention back to the nomad. "Garrett, do you have anything else to tell us?"

"Not really. They started in the States, and are headed here next. I'd say you have a couple of days before they show up. They did not want to give you time to run or hide the girl. Though I am pretty sure they really do want you to run, if only to give them more ammunition against you."

"You're likely correct in that assumption. Aro is a master at this kind of game. He's had it planned out since before he called me to Volterra to retrieve Bella. I'd suggest you go ahead and take your leave then. I'm sure you don't want to be here when they arrive. Thank you for seeking us out. We are in your debt." Carlisle held his hand out for Garrett to take.

"Oh, I'm not going anywhere. I haven't seen this much excitement since the Revolution. I sought you out because I wanted to help you. I may not have a gift, but I will no longer stand by and watch innocent vampires suffer under such a corrupt ruling class."

"You realize that this could mean a death sentence?" Carlisle asked carefully.

"Give me liberty, or give me death." The Patriot stated with an eager smirk. He then clasped Carlisle's hand and an ally was made.

Carmen returned. "The girls took the boat out. It will take them a couple days to get here, but they're coming." Eleazar embraced his mate, knowing the likelihood of them coming out of this unscathed was slim.

"Jasper, do you have any ideas?" Carlisle asked.

"I have a few." All their lives rested in his and Bella's hands.

"Would you like to share?" Rosalie scowled.

"Actually, no. Not yet. If you'll excuse us, Bella and I need to go work out a few things." He leveled her with his icy stare.

"Yes, of course." Carlisle stepped in between the two pseudo-siblings. "Though I believe it might be in Bella's best interest to hunt first. All this training seems to be taking it's toll." He rested his hand on her shoulder lovingly. "Take care of yourself, my daughter." He murmured and Bella nodded in acknowledgment.

Garrett jumped up, radiating nothing but pure excitement. "Can I come? I'd love to see how you hunt."

Jasper turned to Bella, knowing she might be uncomfortable with a stranger watching her hunt, but she surprised him. "Sure. If you're going to be staying, it's probably best if you stick to animals. It's quite a trip to the nearest town and it's quite small."

The giant clapped his hands. "Great! Let's go."

As much as Jasper hated the idea, Garrett would be following Bella while she hunted. If he went with Jasper, they would end up in a fight to defend their prey. Even when he hunted with his brothers, they each took off in different directions. During the hunt, vampires give themselves over entirely to the animal within them. They run on pure instinct. Just as male lions don't hunt together, male vampires don't either. Of course, it was entirely possible that even Bella might turn on Garrett if she felt threatened, but it was unlikely.

Bella shot off into the woods once she scented a herd of caribou and Garrett trailed behind her simply observing her fluid grace as she moved through the trees and underbrush. Hunting humans required little chase, but he could see the true huntress as she tracked down the herd. They did not smell appetizing at all to Garrett, but he was always up for a challenge. He perched himself in a tree as he watched her lithely leap onto the back of a large buck. In a matter of seconds she had snapped his neck, ripped back the fur and began to drain the beast that was easily four times her size. He was instantly aroused at the sight and shocked to find that hunting animals was much more sensual than hunting humans.

Eager to test his own prowess, Garrett took off after the rest of the herd as she finished off her first. He quickly caught two caribou, a small buck and a doe, snapping their necks quickly as Bella had done. He then brought them back to where he left her, presenting Bella with the doe. She looked up at him, surprised at his offering, then quickly ripped back the fur and sank her teeth into it's neck before it's heart stopped beating. Garrett followed suit, keeping his eyes trained on Bella. The first hot spurt of blood down his throat nearly made him gag. It tasted gamey, of grass and dirt, but he couldn't deny that it slaked his thirst, and the hunt was exciting. Even more exciting was watching the delicate creature in front of him. Knowing she was unmated caused his long dormant loins to stir and he wanted to claim her. However, he knew this coven lived differently and was sure his advances would be unwelcome. Still, her eyes, now a swirling gold, were locked on his own as they each finished their own animals. He found himself wanting to protect and provide for her, and wondered if she needed more.

When they finished and she'd shown him how to dispose of the corpses, Bella turned to him with a shy smile. "What do you think?"

"Fascinating." He gave her a lascivious grin.

Bella recognized the look of hunger in his eyes and stammered a bit before she regained her composure. "I know caribou doesn't compare to...to...human blood, but you can get used to it. There's a lynx a little ways to the west if you'd like to try for it. Carnivores taste much better. Bears are Emmett's favorite."

During her rambling, Garrett had closed the distance between them, his eyes focused on her reddened lips. Bella backed up instinctively. He was quite attractive, and it _had_ been a while since she'd been with Peter. But, they'd only just met, and even though she'd allowed Peter certain liberties in regards to her body, she wasn't going to be intimate with any and every male that showed interest in her. Even if she was lonely. Even if he did hunt for her. Perhaps if they got to know one another...

Bella placed a hand on his chest, noting how small she was in comparison to him. "Garrett, you should go take a dip in the river. You are a complete mess." She laughed nervously. "I guess I should have warned you that hunting animals was much messier than humans. I'm sure Emmett has some clothes you can use."

He'd be lying if he said his ego didn't take a hit with her gentle rejection, but he would respect this timid little beauty's wishes. This family was different than other covens he'd come across. They were much more _human_. If he wanted a chance with her, he'd have to take the time to get to know her. He'd have to try to remember how to court a woman.

Garrett heard Jasper approaching and backed up instinctively. "Yes, Garrett, the river is just over there. Bella and I will return to the house and ask Emmett to spare some clothes for you." Jasper's voice was full of menace. He was no idiot, even without his gift Jasper could see how obviously attracted the vampire was to Bella. The pure lust and want radiating off the nomad was too much. It sparked Jasper's protective side and only a small part of him was relieved that Garrett backed off when he had. The rest of him was pissed that the Patriot had the nerve to even try.

"We'll see you at the house, Garrett." Bella said softly, and pulled on Jasper's arm until he stopped glowering at Garrett and followed her. "What was that?" She hissed under her breath once they had put some distance between them.

"He _wanted_ you, Bella." Jasper spat.

"And?" She sighed, exasperated. "I've told you before, Jasper, I don't need to be babysat. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. He understood that he wasn't going to get anywhere with me and he backed off. I don't need you rushing in like a knight in shining armor to save me from the big, bad nomad." Bella stopped abruptly and faced Jasper. "Besides, what if I _wanted_ him too? He is very attractive..."

"Bella!" Jasper hissed. "You don't even know him!"

"So? It's not like he can hurt me."

Jasper just shook his head in disgust.

"What?" Bella exclaimed. "Don't even try to tell me you aren't...frustrated." Her eyes darted into the trees and he could feel her embarrassment. He did not want to talk about this with her.

"Of course I am, but you don't see me pawing over the first female I come across." He immediately regretted his words when her saw the hurt flash across her face. "Bella...I..."

"Don't." She cut him off with a growl, before speeding off towards the house.

Frustrated with himself, Jasper let out a roar and took out a defenseless tree, before heading back to the house himself. Of course he'd had his share of women during his time with Maria, but when he left that life behind, he left any promiscuity behind as well. The only woman he'd been with in over fifty years was Alice. He could no longer see things from any other perspective. Although Edward and Bella had not been intimate, he still viewed their relationship like his was with Alice – monogamous and eternal. He just couldn't separate the physical act of sex from the emotional bond he shared with his mate. He couldn't understand Bella's behavior either. He knew how much she loved Edward, how much she still ached from the loss of her mate. How could she give her body to anyone else?

When he returned to the house, Carlisle and Eleazar were in the study discussing strategies and plans. He thought he should probably join them, but just wasn't in the mood at the moment. As he headed to his room he passed Emmett, clad only in a towel, handing a stack of clothes to Bella. The heavy, humid scent of his and Rose's mating rolled through the hallway and slammed into him. Bella didn't even look abashed. She thanked Emmett and shoved her way past Jasper.

Emmett watched the exchange with amusement. "What did you do this time, bro?"

Jasper shook his head. "That's between me and her." He could see Rose wrapped up in a sheet, still naked in the bed, behind him.

Her eyes widened with realization. "You didn't." She gasped, well aware of his opinion on Bella's activities with Peter.

Jasper nodded. "Garrett.."

"Well of course he'd be attracted to her. She's single and they were hunting together. I honestly don't know how you've kept it in your pants this long."

Jasper growled in warning. "Rose!"

"It's been over a year, Jasper. No one is saying you have to find another mate or fall in love, but maybe releasing a little of this sexual frustration would be good for you. You're beginning to act like Edward. And leave Bella alone! She doesn't need you interfering."

"I'm not discussing this with you." He spat out, turning away abruptly and heading to his room.

The two of them immediately picked up where they left off, and that, combined with his recent hunting trip, left him uncomfortably engorged. He yanked off his dirt caked jeans and headed into the bathroom for a shower. Of course Rose hit a nerve. He was incredibly frustrated. In fact, he was throbbing at the moment. Deciding he could use the release, Jasper tentatively reached down and grasped his erection, hissing at the contact. Alice's face flashed behind his eyelids and immediately felt guilty. He had not touched himself since losing her. Sucking in a breath, he tried again, this time picturing Alice as she hunted. Her tiny body flitting through the savannah as she leapt gracefully on the back of an aging lioness. Her thighs gripped the animals as it tried to run and shake the predator from her back. Alice wrapped her arms around her neck and they began to roll through the dusty grasses in a deadly dance. She then snapped the lioness' neck and Jasper joined her as they both fed from the hot, pulsing blood. Their eyes locked across the dying, heaving form of the large cat. It was the closest to human blood he'd ever had. Jasper remembered how Alice's blouse had torn from the huntress' claws, and a trickle of fresh blood spilled over her chin and onto her exposed cleavage. He continued stroking himself as he remembered the way she tasted on his lips that day. She lay spread out on the ground, divested of her clothes, her skin sparkling in the African sun as he worshiped every inch of her body. And when he finally recalled the way it felt when he slid into her, his cock grew impossibly harder in his hand. The vision of her arching and moaning beneath him was enough to send him spiraling towards his orgasm. At the last second, Alice's face morphed into a different one, and he fell over the edge imagining his hands wrapped in long, chestnut tendrils, as he reached his climax.

He couldn't stop the physical reaction to his manual stimulation, but mentally, he was horrified. As soon as he regained control, he slammed his fist into the tiles, cracking several, and sobbed out in agony. Jasper would never forgive himself for sullying Alice's memory like that. Bella was his sister, and he would always remain faithful to Alice. He would never...could never love another. Deeply ashamed of his unbidden thoughts, Jasper quickly toweled off and retreated to his room, continuing to mentally castigate himself. He wanted nothing to do with anyone until he sorted this out.

After Garrett had enjoyed a shower – his first in years - and dressed in fresh, clean clothes, he found Bella curled up on the back porch. They were both aware of Jasper's private moment. It was unavoidable with senses as finely tuned as theirs and he had been projecting. Garrett was curious as to her relationship with the empath, but was hesitant to ask about something so personal. She was a curious little thing, asking him about his history. Bella listened with rapt attention as he shared some of his personal experiences through the many years since he'd been made a vampire. She was fascinated that he had lived among such legendary figures as George Washington, John Adams, Benjamin Franklin, and Thomas Jefferson.

"This is so much better than any high school history class. You were there when we gained our independence. Do you have any idea how amazing that is?" His ego grew a bit with her blatant adoration.

Garrett was just as fascinated with her. As a nomad, he rarely interacted with humans, unless he was out looking for a meal. The country had changed so much through the years that he really couldn't understand what it would be like to live among humans this day in age. So, Bella obliged him and described what it was like growing up on the cusp of a new millennium. He was somewhat shocked at the amount of freedom all people had, especially when hearing how young people these days conducted themselves. It was hard for him to understand why her mother left her father, he seemed like a good man. He provided for his family and loved his wife and child. Charlie Swan didn't abuse them, and he wasn't an adulterer. When Bella explained that over half of all marriages end in divorce, he was baffled. Times were certainly different now, and Garrett didn't think the changes were very positive. Apples grown in foreign countries and shipped over? Why wouldn't you just eat the apples grown down the road? Of course in his travels, he'd noticed farms were few and far between, and those that remained were more commercial, growing food for corporations, not the people.

"Don't you ever get lonely?" Bella's soft voice interrupted his musings.

"Of course." He replied. "But it's been over two hundred years. You kind of get used to being alone."

"Didn't you ever want to settle down somewhere...or with someone...?"

"Honestly, I've never met anyone I'd care to spend more than a couple days with." Garrett replied. He'd often wondered what it would be like to have a mate. He'd come across other female vampires before, but none of them held his interest. He had friends scattered around the country, but they were all loners, or mated, and he'd never had a desire to live with any of them. "It would be nice to find someone to share this life with. I've just never found anyone interesting enough to make me want to settle down." He admitted.

"I'd like to travel, I think." Bella whispered.

"Then why don't you?"

"Apparently, I'm too young. But it's hard being here...being around these happily mated couples and knowing he's never coming back. Being reminded constantly of everything I've lost...everything they lost. On the other hand, I don't want to be alone. I've done that, and I don't think I could do it again." Her eyes were unfocused as she looked out over the yard. The sky was fading from black to a deep indigo signaling the start of another day. _Another day without him._ She thought to herself.

"You could come with me when I leave." He offered tentatively, unsure of how to help quell the sorrow etched deeply into her features.

A small smile lifted her lips. "Hmmm...maybe." Her expression turned thoughtful and they sat in silence as they watched the sunrise.

A new friendship was blooming between the two. Bella thought it was refreshing to have a friend who wasn't tied to the tragedies she'd experience. It would be possible to start over, with no reminders of the past if she were to go with him. It was something to consider.

Jasper finally pulled himself out of his self-imposed banishment and though he didn't want to face Bella, he knew he'd have to. The family needed a quick lesson on fighting and strategy, and Bella needed to work on her shields. If they were going to get out of this alive, they didn't have time for anything else.

He called everyone to assemble in the living room, and then gave out orders for the day.

"We will start with some sparring, I'll teach you as much as I can and then leave you to practice. Then I'm going to work with Bella on her shield, we had a real breakthrough yesterday, so I'll be taking over her training for now. Once we've made some progress, I'll be back to go over strategy. I'd like to see what you have already come up with and everyone needs to learn the specific gifts of the Guard. Then we'll hunt, and I suggest we fill up, because we're going to need every resource."

Bella sat wide eyed, in awe of his military persona. He commanded the attention of every vampire in the room and there was no doubt she'd stand at attention and jump to follow his orders. It helped her better understand why he was the way he was with her sometimes. He was a military man, through and through, and that would always be a part of him. She felt herself softening towards him a bit, knowing some of his behavior was because of his personality, and not something personal between them. Jasper trained countless newborns, and to him she was another newborn in need of training. It finally all came together in her mind and it was easier to forgive some of his behavior towards her.

Everyone jumped up and followed him without question to the clearing that was the backyard. Bella was surprised that Carlisle or Eleazar hadn't stepped up to take charge, but supposed it made sense for Jasper to be the one. She wondered if he felt good to finally be of use to the family, as he'd revealed to her how he usually felt like a burden and had little to contribute.

"Garrett." Jasper motioned for the nomad to join him in front of the others. "We're both military men, from different wars, but I figured we'd be a well matched pair. Just fight on instinct and I'll narrate strategy for everyone. Okay?"

Garrett nodded and crouched, ready for the fight. He easily towered over Jasper by several inches and was closer to Emmett's build, but Jasper had taken out bigger and meaner vampires in his years, sometimes more than one at a time.

Everyone watched the two vampires as they engaged each other. Jasper was fast and it was impossible for Garrett to get a hold on him. Garrett fared well enough against his opponent, as they tumbled and grappled and crashed into each other. But eventually Jasper ended the bout with his teeth at the nomad's neck. Everyone else listened as Jasper explained what Garrett did wrong and what he could have done to better defend himself, and then they went at it again. The next few hours continued in this strain. They all paired up and Jasper made his rounds through the group critiquing their methods and offering his insight.

Bella was paired up with Rosalie and found it difficult to attack her sister, even with the animosity that still existed between them. So Rose made the first move, forcing Bella to defend herself. They engaged in a battle that was more playful than it should have been, until Jasper forced unnatural anger on the pair and Bella sent Rose flying across the clearing as her shield flexed. Quickly comprehending what was happening, she pulled back and kept her bubble under control so it did not expand far enough to reach anyone else. Jasper was practically glowing with pride, but Rose was furious and launched herself right back at Bella, only to find she couldn't get within a foot of her. She finally ceased her attack and huffed, placing her hands on her hips in a snit. Everyone else had stopped and was staring at Bella with looks of amazement and pride.

Uneasy with the attention, Bella ducked her head and mumbled an apology to Rose.

"What are you apologizing for? You are set woman! I'd like to see Aro get his hands on you now." Her beautiful face broke into a smile and she held out her hand towards Bella for a congratulatory shake. Bella took her hand hesitantly, after allowing her shield to drop, and then found herself launched through the air and crashing into a tree. Bella would have been pissed, but it was all she could do to stop from laughing, and soon the rest of the family joined in. Finally, Jasper cut them off, sucking all the amusement right out of the air, literally.

"Alright, good one Bella and Rose. Let's get back to work. Bella, we'll go work on your shield now. Everyone else continue sparring and make sure to trade partners. Emmett, don't be afraid to take Esme down, there will be women in the Guard as well." Everyone snapped to attention, though they shot Bella and Jasper curious looks as they ran off through the woods. Carlisle and Eleazar were practically salivating at the chance to follow them and see what breakthrough Jasper had been talking about. Little did they know it would be revealed sooner than they anticipated.


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Thanks so much for your continued support. Of course, I don't own anything._

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"Alright, Bella. I know you can keep yourself safe with your shield, but I want to see if you can fight while keeping it up. You'll need to keep it very close to your body, like a second skin. Do you think you could do something like that?"

After a couple hours of practice, Bella had gained better control of her physical shield, and Jasper wanted to see what else she could do with it. It was a great defensive weapon, but basically left her standing in one spot while her opponent tried to breach it. If she could fight, while still protecting herself, then her enemies wouldn't be able to simply run away when they realized they couldn't touch her.

"I'll try." She furrowed her brow in concentration and the air shimmered around her as she formed her bubble. The usual round shape actually seemed to shrink in around her a bit.

"Attack me." Jasper ordered, wanting to see if she could hold it while doing something else.

As soon as she leapt at him, her shield dissipated. At least it didn't pop. She was learning better control, letting it sink back into her rather than explode outwards.

"Again." Jasper barked.

Letting out a sharp growl in frustration, she returned to her mark and tried again. She didn't really mind his military attitude as he trained her. It actually helped. She liked that he pushed her and refused to let her give up. It was a good thing vampires didn't get tired.

They kept it up, and eventually Bella was able to maintain some semblance of her physical shield while she and Jasper sparred, however it took a lot of concentration, which detracted from her fighting skills. But, because of the nature of her shield, it didn't really matter, as she remained protected from her enemy. She likened the experience to that of surgeons using robot arms in an operation. She could control her movements, and that of her shield, but it all lacked the dexterity of actual touch. They had made great progress, but it would take time for her to learn to manipulate her shield enough to be successful at direct combat.

"That's enough for today, Bella. We should probably hunt." Jasper ended their training for the time being, wanting to touch base with the rest of the family and discuss strategy.

"About that..." Bella hesitated. He could feel her nerves and it made him jumpy.

"Just ask." He prodded.

"I was wondering if maybe we...it it might be best...argh! Maybe human blood would make us stronger?" The last sentence buzzed off her lips almost too quickly for him to catch.

To say Jasper was shocked would be an understatement. "What do you mean?" He knew what she meant, and he knew her idea had merit.

"Well, Edward once told me that living only off the blood of animals was like a human being a vegetarian. It was enough to sustain you, but never really enough to fully satisfy you. I mean, I assume human blood makes vampires stronger, and I just don't want to take any chances. I won't allow them to harm another member of my family." Her eyes flashed with fury.

"Could you live with that, Bella?" Jasper asked softly, grasping her hands in his and reaching out to judge her sincerity.

"I...I think so. If I knew it was going to help me be my best...my strongest...if I knew it might help save my family. If the person was a criminal or terminally ill...I think I could do it." Bella stammered, but he could sense her determination.

He pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her. "It's true, it would give us a better chance, but I don't want you to do anything you might live to regret. We'll talk to Carlisle..."

Her entire body stiffened. "No! He can't know."

Jasper chuckled. "Bella, he's going to know just by looking at your eyes. Besides, you didn't let me finish. We'll talk to Carlisle and see if we can get some donated blood. That would be best for both our consciences. Though if I'm honest, taking a life to defend our family and seek retribution for the death of our mates, would be acceptable to me."

Bella nodded against his chest and sought comfort in his embrace. As much as they were at odds, she could never deny how calming his presence could be. They were in this together, and they would serve justice upon those who hurt them.

"Let's hunt." Jasper whispered before giving her another quick squeeze and releasing her.

They had only gone a few steps when Bella stopped suddenly, crying out.

Jasper rushed to her side once more. "What is it?"

Bella pressed her hands against her chest as if she were in pain. "I don't know." She rasped. "Something is wrong. We have to go back. Something is pulling me back to the house."

Realization settled over Jasper. "Carlisle." He murmured, then grabbed her hand and they raced back towards the house. It had been a long time since he'd felt the pull of his own maker, and he hoped he never would. As they closed in, the scent of many unfamiliar vampires assaulted their senses and they knew instantly that the Volturi had arrived.

The scene that greeted them was horrifying. Especially to Bella. Aro stood at the front of a mass of cloaked vampires, his gaze locked on her as she emerged from the trees. There were nine of them, not the entire Guard, but most of them – the ones that mattered anyway. The atmosphere was thick with Aro's manic obsession. He _wanted_ Bella and would stop at nothing to get her. He was nearly salivating at the thought of possessing her. The intensity of Aro's emotions caused Jasper to nearly panic with the need to protect her. He jumped in front of her. "Run, Bella, and keep them up!" Jasper ordered. He knew she would be protected from Jane, and Demetri could not track her. On top of that, she could avoid any physical attack should they try to follow her.

"I can't." She hissed from behind him. Even if she wanted to run, she could not physically make herself turn away from the assembly in front of her. Even if her own vengeance and sense of loyalty weren't so strong, she could not do it. Charlotte had never retracted her spell, and Jasper cursed as he realized it.

There were so many reasons why she couldn't just turn and run, the least of which was Charlotte's spell.

Jasper wanted her to save herself.

Bella wanted to save her family.

"Isabella, how nice of you to join us. Immortality suits you." His lips formed a sinister smile. "We were just asking Carlisle here about you. Thought it was time to check in. A little birdie told me about your little adventure, and I know we made it clear that Carlisle would be responsible for you during your newborn year." She shivered involuntarily at the sound of the ancient vampire's voice. It held so much malice and brought back memories she'd rather forget.

"As you can see, I am right here Aro. Now that you have checked in, you can move on." He studied her for a moment, weighing his next move.

"Ah, but my dear, we came all this way, just to see you. Surely you can humor us for a little while longer. I'd like to see if you've retained your shield. Perhaps you've developed your gift further? Please, come here. Let me look at you!" His words slithered through the air and made her stomach coil in fear. This was part of the game, and she was just a pawn. She could sacrifice herself if it meant the rest of the family was safe.

Jasper's head snapped up when he felt all traces of her emotions disappear, and he watched helplessly as she approached the imposing group of vampires. Aro held his hand out invitingly, and Bella placed one finger on his palm, only wanting to share the briefest touch with the monster. Unsatisfied, Aro gripped her hand with both of his, effectively holding her in place.

"Still so silent." He murmured. "Jane?" Bella looked over at the evil bitch and returned her glare with a smug smile. "Still immune. Chelsea?" He turned his head to look at the unremarkable brunette to his right. She shook her head infinitesimally. He looked towards one of the hulking male vampires behind him and Bella's eyes narrowed as a growl sprang from her chest. Images of Alice and Edward's deaths flew unbidden through her mind as she relived the pain and horror of their final moments caused by the two devils flanking Aro.

Surprisingly, Aro chuckled. "Oh she remembers you, Demetri. Felix too, I would imagine. I'd watch your back boys." Demetri scoffed and Felix continued to leer at her. "Now, now boys. We've seen how reckless a widowed mate can be when it comes to seeking vengeance. It's a shame we had to end the redhead. She had such an interesting gift for evasion. Gave Demetri a run for his money. Such a waste, but I'm afraid she was less than discreet when creating a newborn army to take out your coven and had to be punished."

"Victoria." Bella gasped. Aro dropped her hand and she immediately backed up towards her family. Esme wrapped her arm around Bella's shoulders and tried to stop her trembling.

"Yes. She'll no longer be bothering you...or anyone for that matter." The gleeful smile disappeared from his face as he turned to Carlisle. "Now, Carlisle." Aro extended his hand.

Carlisle countered by clasping his hands behind his back. "No, Aro. You do not have the right to invade anyone's personal thoughts. I have done nothing wrong. As you can see, Bella is with us as an immortal, and she has not exposed us in any capacity to the humans. You have no right to put us on trial."

Aro's eyes widened for a moment before a scowl appeared. "Jane." He ordered and Carlisle was immediately brought to his knees, writhing in pain. The entire family moved to protect their patriarch, but in a single leap, Bella landed in front of Carlisle. "Leave him alone." She growled, and the entire Guard tensed as they readied themselves to attack. Bella fixed her glare on Jane, wishing she could reflect the pain back onto the evil bitch. "Stop." She demanded, but Jane only gave her a smug smile. Bella turned to Aro. "Make her stop!" Bella was struggling to contain herself and her shield. It was pulsing, threatening to explode in order to protect herself and her maker.

"Ah, ah, ah. I have to hold someone accountable, Isabella. If Carlisle does not wish to share with me, then it proves he is guilty. He is hiding something. We already know that you disappeared for most of your newborn year. I'd like to know why."

Enraged, Bella wanted nothing more than to protect her entire family from the sadistic witch, and immediately felt a rush of energy flow out of her. The pained moans of her creator stopped instantly and Bella steadied herself as she suddenly sensed her entire family under her shield with her. She was so surprised that she almost lost it, but quickly found her bearings and marveled at her new found power.

The look on Jane's face was priceless as she took in Bella's smug smile. Everyone realized what had happened at the same moment and a buzzing of sounds erupted around them.

"Excellent!" Aro hissed, feeling as if he'd won the lottery. "It appears I was correct about you, Isabella. You have quite the gift and will be a nice addition to my Guard." Jane's scowl turned even more furious, if that was possible.

"I will never join your Guard, Aro. You may be the self-appointed leaders of the vampire world, but you are all corrupt and hungry for power. I will never be a part of that. You cannot force me to join."

Aro's answering chuckle was menacing. "You are wrong, my child. I can take whatever I want. If you chose not to join me, I have ways to convince you. You have no mate, there is nothing tying you here. Think of all the power you will have when you sit at my side. You will be treated as a queen, with the world at your feet. Why would you give all that up to live _here_ and hunt _animals_ like some savage?"

"Because, unlike you, I am capable of love, and these people are my family. I would give up everything, even my own life, to know that they were safe. Money and power mean nothing to me. I have everything I need right here...well almost...you took two of the most important people in my life from us, and I promise you will live to regret the day you crossed the Cullens." Bella bared her teeth, turning her smile into a frightening expression. "You were right, dear Aro." She cooed condescendingly. "A vampire who has had her mate taken from her can be quite vengeful. I will stop at nothing to see you destroyed. Not only for Alice and Edward, but for all the others you've destroyed in your campaigns. How arrogant you are to think you have any right to play God. We are not playthings for your entertainment. We are not possessions to be collected. We may not be human, but we are still people, and we have rights and feelings. You cannot continue to exploit us."

Jasper stepped up to Bella's side in a show of support. "You will not take Bella, or anyone else in our family. You have no right. You have overstepped your bounds for the last time, Aro. We will fight for the rights of all vampires, and their freedom to live as they wish."

Aro eyes were black as pitch as he nearly vibrated with rage. "You are all foolish to think you are any match for my Guard. Your threats are enough to condemn you all. This is treason!" He turned his fiery gaze to Bella and pointed. "Seize her."

Felix and Demetri advanced on Bella, but she threw out her second shield and they were thrown back to the ground. There was silence for several seconds as everyone processed what happened. It was long enough for Aro to reach a decision. The Cullens were too powerful, and if Bella would not join him, then they would all be destroyed. He gave the order, throwing his hand in the air and gesturing for his Guard to attack. They advanced as one, a mass of black cloaks and red eyes. Their footsteps whispering as they approached with some trepidation, not knowing the extent of Bella's power.

As soon as Bella realized what was about to occur, she concentrated harder than she had ever done so before. It was easier for her physical shield to follow the path of her mental shield as it expanded and she felt the presence of each of her family members as they slipped inside it. What had previously been impenetrable, was now malleable to her will. With her family safely ensconced within her shield, Bella's mind tumbled through the what ifs. How long could she hold it? Would they wait around for her to fail? Should that happen, who should she take out first? Jane was the obvious target. If she were gone, the rest of her family would have a chance. Alec would be next, and then if Chelsea were still standing, destroying her could throw off the Guard's loyalty. She was responsible for dissolving or strengthening bonds between vampires, often using her gift to make them feel loyal enough to the Volturi that they'd willingly leave their mates and covens in order to join the Guard. The whole order might fall apart if she were destroyed.

But Bella's vengeful eye rested on Felix and Demetri. She wanted nothing more than to tear them into a thousand pieces and burn them one by one, hoping they would feel even a fraction of the pain they'd caused her family. Jasper noticed her focused determination and grabbed her hand for a quick squeeze.

"They're mine. They will pay." He murmured, knowing exactly what her intentions were. "Jane first." Bella nodded. Her whole family's safety depending on her ending the witch twins first.

The family waited, crouched and ready for the attack, as the Guard approached. No one took a breath as they waited, each choosing and sizing up their opponent. The three brothers, along with Renata and Chelsea faded into the background, unwilling to risk their own lives on the front lines.

When the enemy was stopped by an invisible force about twenty feet away, the Cullens and their friends all turned to Bella and gaped in surprise. The Guard immediately rounded the shield Bella held in place, searching for a breach, which they would not find. The family inside backed themselves into a circle, keeping an eye on their enemies as they surrounded the invisible force field.

Demetri looked, almost helplessly, to Aro. "We cannot approach. There seems to be some type of invisible barrier surrounding them."

Bella was quite in awe of what she was able to do. She would have preferred to have had some practice before needing it in such a dire practical situation, but the danger only forced her try harder to protect those she loved. It gave her incentive. She wanted to do more with it and suddenly had an idea, though she was afraid of the consequences should she not succeed.

"We can wait them out. They'll have to hunt sometime, and as she grows weaker so will her shield." Aro stated with confidence.

Bella had hoped her display would encourage them to move on and leave her family alone, but apparently Aro's greed knew no bounds. Bella looked to Carlisle, his usual calm countenance was replaced with anger, his eyes black and jaw clenched. When he looked back at her, she saw nothing but pride and raw determination. He would do whatever it took to take out the Volturi. He squeezed his newest daughter's hand. They would all seek revenge for Alice and Edward together.

She studied the Guard surrounding them. _This is like a chess game._ Bella thought to herself. The way they had positioned themselves, it was obvious who the pawns where. Who they were willing to sacrifice in order to protect the more important players. Renata was the last defense before they could reach Aro, but they'd have to get through everyone else first. Especially Jane and Alec. Bella had successfully included her family and friends in her shield and wondered if she'd be able to manipulate it again. If she could separate Jane from the others...

As they stood staring at one another, locked in a stalemate, Bella tentatively reached our her physical shield towards Jane, trying to gently slip it over her so the rest of the Guard could not reach her. No one knew what she was attempting, and she prayed harder than she ever had before that she wouldn't fail. As her bubble gave way to the stone figure of Jane, who never ceased glaring at various members of her family, she let out a little breath of relief that the rest of her defenses remained intact. Now that she had succeeded with the first part of her plan, she wasn't sure how to proceed. As badly as she wanted to remove the little bitch's head from her body, Bella was afraid of letting down her shield and leaving her family vulnerable. So, she turned to Jasper and squeezed his hand to get his attention. With a flick of her eyes towards Jane, she let him feel her want and bloodlust. Then a whisper. "She's in."

Jasper's eyes widened slightly, while the rest of the family, as well as the enemy, remained confused. They had no idea what those two words could mean. But Jasper knew. Within seconds he'd launched himself at the tiny girl and a ripping metallic sound echoed through the forest. The Guard tried to intervene, Demetri and another male were closest, but they could not penetrate the shield and were forced to watch helplessly as Jane was ripped to pieces. Jasper threw them in separate directions to gather up later and burn. He didn't want to risk a fire inside the shield.

Bewildered, the Guard backed away slowly, frightened by the unknown parameters of Bella's gifts. Aro and the brothers were hissing furiously, trying to discuss strategy, but they only managed to argue amongst themselves.

Bella decided to make another move, and slipped her shield over Alec this time. A quick squeeze to Jasper's hand and their victim's name was all he needed to quickly close the space between them, but Alec was ready and countered Jasper's attack. They wrestled for less than a minute before Emmett leapt into the fray and then it was over as the other twin was disassembled quickly. The rest of the Guard beat a hasty retreat, keeping themselves between the brothers and the Cullens. They realized quickly that if they continued in this manner, they could be picked off one by one with no chance of retaliation. The Volturi did not relish the idea of being sitting ducks.

Carlisle called out to Aro. "I think we have the advantage here, Aro. I would suggest you take your Guard and leave before any more of them meet the same fate. The odds are not in your favor, should we decide to attack."

The furious expression on Aro's face was enough to frighten any vampire. He had never been defeated before, and was not about to start a new trend. He had handpicked his Guard to be an unstoppable force. To have someone as powerful as Bella and for her to be impervious to his influence enraged him to a point he'd never been before. He would stop at nothing to possess her, and the rest of the family would be destroyed for interfering. Aro cursed the day he'd let Carlisle walk away from Volterra with her. He should have changed Bella himself.

"This is not over." He hissed. His steely gaze settled on Bella, promising her with unspoken words that she would be his one day. Aro knew he couldn't stay here and allow his Guard to be destroyed. They would retreat, for now, and regroup. He would find new talents to conquer her, and he would return. With a gesture, the black mass moved back into formation and slowly faded away into the trees, a foreboding mist swirling in their wake.

Bella stared after the retreating forms of the Volturi. She held Jasper and Carlisle's hands in a death grip and seemed incapable of releasing her hold. She couldn't believe that they would give up so easily. Had she really protected them all? Had they really taken out Aro's precious witch twins? The answer to that was evident as their disassembled body parts writhed eerily on the ground around her. It was as if she was watching them from outside her body, a certain sense of detachment from the whole situation had taken hold of her. When she saw Jane's disembodied head, Images of her bringing Edward and Alice to their knees in pain flashed before her eyes.

She remembered the cold hands of the two hulking males, gripping her arms too tightly as they dragged her through the tunnels under Volterra. It had been so cold that she couldn't stop shivering. Bella had been certain they would kill her, and waited numbly for one of the red eyed beasts to sink their teeth into her. She welcomed death. Hoped for it. The pain was too much. She couldn't go on. Aro's skin was dry and papery, his voice raspy as he reached for her, his eyes lit up with excitement over a new find. The look of amazement and frustration when he realized he couldn't hear her, his grip growing too tight as he tried to force his way into her mind. They'd taken her to a cell then. Felix leered her while they wove their way through the winding maze of stone walls and descended further into the castle. His hands were rough as they groped her, eager to molest and take what he could from her. She hoped he'd lose control. It had been Marcus who stopped him and sent him away before locking her in a dark, damp cell and essentially leaving her there to rot. She'd had no clue how long she had been there, or if she'd ever see the sun again. She did not know if they were going to kill her, change her, or let her live. She had nothing to cling to as her entire world had been burnt to ashes before her eyes.

No one came for her.

_No one came._

Until Carlisle.

"...Bella?" He was gripping her by the shoulders, calling her name, but it sounded so distant. It felt like the entire earth was shaking. Then she realized it was her. Finally, her legs gave out and she sank to her knees, arms wrapped around her torso. Sound roared in her ears once more, too loudly, and her vision cleared. Everything was so sharp and bright. Carlisle was in front of her, his hands moving gingerly over her body, searching for any injury. Someone was behind her, arms wrapped around her waist and hard body pressed against her back. Bewildered, Bella looked around her, mentally cataloging that everyone was indeed safe. She inhaled deeply and let the familiar scents of her family calm her. _Jasper. _It was his arms that held her. Esme was to her left, stroking her hair repeatedly. Emmett and Rose and Garrett looked on, concerned creases marring their foreheads.

"There you are, sweet girl." Carlisle's features relaxed minutely. He cradled her head in his hands and pulled her to his chest. "They're gone, dear one. They can't hurt you now. You did so good. You're safe, Bella." He continued to try to soothe his newest daughter. Once her trembling ceased, Carlisle pulled back and looked her in the eye once more. "Are you okay?" He whispered. Bella shook her head. Too much had happened. Too much had been at stake. "Can you let your shields down? I promise they're gone."

She bit her lip and nodded. Closing her eyes, Bella concentrated on letting go and finally felt her shields retract. Her family members slipped out one by one, until only she was left and they hugged her like a second skin. It was strange how she could now feel them surrounding her like a humming energy, just waiting to spring forth once more.

"She needs to hunt." Carlisle spoke over her shoulder.

Bella could feel Jasper's arms tightening around her as he nodded. "Let me in." He whispered in her ear, wanting to gauge her emotions for himself.

"I can't." Her words were barely audible. "Not yet." She shook her head frantically. The fear and bloodlust were still coursing through her. She felt like a caged animal as everyone's attention remained on her. She was surrounded and found herself beginning to panic, a low, warning growl building deep in her chest.

Jasper pulled her up immediately and turned her around, forcing her to look in his eyes. His hands cupped her cheeks. "Look at me, Bella. You are safe. You have to let me in. Let me help you." Her eyes were black and feral, and he could see her slipping away. "Let me in." He murmured, before hugging her tightly and exaggerating his steady breathing in order to pull her back from the edge. She was panting, every muscle tensed as she resisted his embrace. Eventually, Bella was able to slow her breathing so that it matched Jasper's. Then she let him in. Both their bodies visibly relaxed as he was able to finally feel her and push more calm her way.

"Get me out of here." She pleaded, knowing she needed to hunt, but she needed her space more.

"Wrap your legs around me." Jasper kept her in his embrace as she easily wrapped her legs around his hips, her arms tightly wound around his neck. "Give us some time. She needs to hunt. We'll talk when we get back." He told his family. Bella's face was tightly pressed into his neck as she practically gulped down his soothing scent, reminding herself that the remainder of her family was still there, still safe.

It wasn't that she didn't trust their reassurances that the danger was gone, but today's confrontation had brought back too many bad memories. They may be safe for the time being, but Aro's threat had been clear. War had been declared. He would stop at nothing to destroy her loved ones in order to possess her. Bella contemplated joining just to save them, but there were no guarantees that they would even be safe then. It was entirely possible, and more than likely, that the moment Aro had Bella in Volterra, leaving her family unprotected, he would send someone to take them out. She would never even know. With the Cullens out of the picture, she'd have nowhere else to go. Aro always had his ways of getting what he wanted, and if Chelsea couldn't ensure Bella's loyalty, then he would go after the only ones left that mattered to her. No, she had to stay with them and protect them until the threat was gone.

Jasper sprinted through the trees completely amazed by the vampire clinging to him. He knew her gift was extraordinary, but never imagined she could possess such control and finesse with as little training has she'd had. The moment her family was threatened, she stepped up to the challenge and kept them all safe, even reaching out further and destroying the two most dangerous of Aro's Guard. If they had not been called off, she could have picked them off one by one and not one member of the Volturi could have stopped her. It was an awesome power to have. He'd never seen anything like it. Until Bella, no one had thwarted Jane or Alec, or even Aro or Edward. If he believed in Fate, Jasper would have thought Bella was sent to them for a reason - that she was meant to end the reign of tyranny brought on by the Volturi brothers. Perhaps that was something Alice had seen, and the reason she was bound and determined that Bella would join the family, even sacrificing her own life so that the human girl might live.

She was trembling in his arms from a mixture of fear, sorrow and relief. She needed to hunt, but doubted she'd have the faculties to do so at the moment. Jasper slowed, hearing a moose crashing through the trees not far off. He stopped, pressing Bella up against a tree and prying her head from his shoulder.

"Bella." He called her name, drawing her focus to him. Her eyes were wild. Jasper cupped her face, his thumbs softly stroking her cheeks. "Do you want me to bring him to you?"

He could smell the sweet venom as it flooded her mouth in anticipation of a meal. Bella shook her head and squirmed against him in an effort to get down. Jasper cursed mentally as he felt his body responding to her and backed up quickly. He told himself it was a natural reaction to the bloodlust. He had just been in battle and killed two vampires, and having her pressed up against him would naturally cause him to react. She took off like a shot after the moose and he followed at a reasonable pace. Once she had some fresh blood in her system, she would be more coherent. Her gift had taken an incredible toll on her body. _And what an incredible body it was._ Jasper shook his head violently, attempting to dislodge the less than chaste thoughts that were taunting him. He ripped a branch from a tree as he passed by and threw it so hard in the other direction that it lanced through the trunk of another.

She ran through the woods with the loping grace of a predator. Whereas Alice had been lithe and light, flitting along much like a fairy or leaping gracefully like a gazelle, Bella was more feline in her approach. Crouched low, her muscles bunched as she ran stealthily, long tendrils of hair flowing behind her. The moose wasn't far off, and didn't put up much of a fight. Jasper watched as she launched herself off the trunk of a tree, grasping his antlers in her hands and snapping his neck as she flipped it to the ground. In the next second, her teeth had sunk into the neck of large animal and he could hear her sucking down the blood. Her eyes were closed as her face contorted in a grimace of both pain and ecstasy. It wasn't long before her throat constricted once more with the final mouthful of blood and her pink tongue darted out to catch any drips, not allowing a single drop to escape. Irrational jealousy coursed through him. He wanted to lick those drops from her full lips. Jasper was hanging by a thread, trying to maintain some semblance of control. His body was reacting in ways that should only be for Alice. Months of sexual frustration, compounded by those surrounding him, added to the fight and the killing and the hunting...and all he could do was think about ravishing his brother's mate as she hovered over her kill. He needed a release and she was the closest available female. That was all it was. That was what he tried to tell himself. A part of him refused to be convinced. He yanked his hands through his hair in frustration and when he looked at her again, her golden eyes were ablaze and locked on him. He could feel her lust, but he didn't know if it was her own or if it was in response to his. There was no doubt he'd been projecting, as if she couldn't tell just by looking at him what he was thinking about.

So Jasper did the only thing he could think of to do at the moment.

He turned and ran.

* * *

_A/N: Just wanted to mention that this isn't going to be a story where Jasper & Bella fall in love immediately and realize Edward and Alice were all wrong for them. They truly were mated to them and it's not a loss either of them will ever take lightly. Will there be love? Yes, but it's not going to happen like some of you might be expecting. There's not going to be a wedding, but there will be a HEA. This is more a tale of revenge and fate, and how these two learn to cope. I hope that you will continue to read and review, but most of all enjoy!_


	14. Chapter 14

Emmett and Rose were waiting outside as Jasper emerged from the trees, he could feel their satisfaction and pride as they regarded the thin wisps of smoke still rising from the ashes of what used to be Jane and Alec. Those emotions quickly switched to anger and annoyance.

"Where is Bella?" Rose focused her steely gaze on her brother. "What did you do?" she hissed.

Jasper met her eyes for a fraction of a second before dashing past them into the house and straight up to the shower. He had to remove her scent. It was a blatant reminder of his almost mistake. He'd almost taken advantage of his _sister!_ He'd disrespected Alice just by even considering it.

Rosalie took off after Bella with a growl because Jasper was an idiot for leaving Bella in the woods so soon after their confrontation with the Volturi. What if they were still in the area?

She found the fresh corpse of a moose Bella had drained, but Bella's trail continued on. Rose's stomach dropped when she remembered the first time Bella left them, and how they hadn't been able to find her despite months of searching. What if she had taken off again?

Bella's scent disappeared in the middle of nowhere, and if it wasn't for the persistent scratching coming from above her, Rose never would have thought to look up in the trees.

"_Oh Bella..."_ The words were just a whisper on the breeze, but Bella heard and the noise stopped. She never would have thought Rose would be the one to come after her.

"I'm here," Bella replied quietly.

Rosalie leaped gracefully into the tree and landed on a branch across from her sister. She took a moment to admire the almost lifelike carving of her lost brother. She watched as Bella's fingers softly caressed the graven cheek of Edward's image.

"I always imagined one day I'd have a little boy to scold about climbing trees, but now I have Emmett to look after instead." Rose hoped to engage Bella in conversation, though she wasn't surprised when there was no response. It's not like she had ever tried to nurture any kind of sisterly bond with Bella.

"It's peaceful up here," Rose tried again. "I used to find caves to hide away in whenever I needed some time alone. Everybody needs their own sanctuary."

"A flock of birds were roosting nearby, but they flew away. This world would be so much better if we could communicate in song, like they do, instead of spoken words. It must have been so difficult for Edward. Words lie so easily, but music...music is the language of the soul. You simply cannot sing a happy song when you're sad. It automatically comes out a little slower, a little softer, more melancholy..."

Rose hummed in agreement, surprised that Bella was talking to her.

Bella continued, "Edward's eyes gave it all away. I saw the truth that day. He didn't mean the words he spoke to me. I _wanted_ to believe him. It was easier to believe that he really didn't want me, than to think he could lie so easily to hurt me. But, his love was in every note of music that he played for me. There was no denying the way he truly felt."

She turned to Rose. "It hurts," she whimpered, pressing her hands over her still heart.

"I know," Rose whispered, as she moved next to Bella and wrapped her arms around her.

"No you don't!" Bella hissed. "You have no idea!"

"Bella, I know it's not fair that he was taken from you. I know it's not fair that I still have my mate while you and Jasper have lost yours. I know the pain of losing my brother and sister. Even though you may think of me as a frigid bitch, they were _my family_." Rose's voice was soft, but firm. "You, of all people, should know how much family means. Especially in this life."

"But you still have Emmett," Bella insisted.

"And you still have your family, Bella," Rose countered. "We are here for you. No, we'll never take the place of Edward, no one will, but we do care for you. You can still be happy." he gave Bella one last squeeze before jumping down from the tree. "Come home soon, Bella. You have new sisters to meet!"

Bella contemplated Rose's words. It was simply a part of life to continue on after losing a loved one. Vampires watched the people they loved grow old and die, generation after generation. Maybe she didn't have to have such a fatalistic view of her existence. Maybe she could eventually be happy. It just hurt so much.

Bella regretted not taking a moment to freshen up when she laid eyes on the three blonde goddesses in her living room. Even more beautiful than Rosalie, the sisters would have made Alice proud with their style and poise. Bella felt every bit like the feral newborn Peter had found in the woods, her clothes torn and hair matted with blood and dirt...and was that...? She discretely toed off her shoes and kicked them behind the couch. _Ewwww. _She didn't miss the tallest one's nose twitching in disgust.

Esme and Carlisle stood in the living room, pained smiles plastered on their faces. "Bella, this is Tanya, Irina, and Kate." Esme gestured to each one in turn. "Girls, this is Bella."

The shorter one, Kate, moved forward first and before she knew it, Bella was wrapped in this strange vampire's arms and being squeezed within an inch of her life. "It is so good to finally meet you, Bella," Kate whispered fervently in her ear. "I know we just met, but if you ever need someone to talk to, please consider me." She released Bella from her arms, but quickly grasped her hands and made eye contact. "I won't say that I know how you feel, but I can relate. I lost someone at the hands of Volturi, too." Kate glanced back at her sisters and the same sadness flashed over all of their features. Finally, she released her hands and stepped away.

Next was Irina, with her silvery-blonde hair that hung straight down to her waist. The complexity of the color fascinated Bella so much that her fingers twitched, itching to feel the texture. She was so absorbed in the vampire's hair that she almost missed the wary look Irina gave her before she stepped a little closer with her hand extended. "Bella." Irina was not as warm or friendly as her sister, but Bella took her hand just the same and they shook politely. Irina quickly pulled her hand back and began twisting her fingers together nervously. Her eyes darted all over the room before coming back to land on Bella. Everyone waited for her to speak further, as she clearly had something more to say.

Jasper's jaw clenched as the waves of anxiety rolled off Irina. He fought the urge to place himself between the two women, worried that whatever the newcomer had to reveal would somehow hurt Bella.

Irina finally cleared her throat. "Um...I...I just wanted to apologize for Laurent's behavior, when he..." She trailed off but gestured with her hand, hoping that Bella would fill in the blanks. "I had no idea, Bella...Carlisle..." She turned her golden eyes to the Cullen patriarch. "I am so sorry. I was so angry that I almost sought revenge on the wolves that killed him. If it hadn't been for my sisters...I understand now that as much as it hurts, he was in the wrong and received his rightful punishment." Irina hung her head in shame after her stammered confession.

Carlisle quickly strode forward and embraced Irina, patting her back in his fatherly way. "You were never to blame, Irina. He deceived you. You have no need to apologize, but if you need to hear it, all is forgiven." He released her and stepped back, the two exchanging a solemn nod of understanding.

Bella quickly reached out and squeezed Irina's hand with a bit of affection. "It wasn't your fault." With Bella's forgiveness, Irina finally relaxed in relief.

Bella turned her attention expectantly to the third sister, Tanya.

Tanya didn't step forward or offer any sort of physical contact in greeting. She looked the petite brunette up and down, wondering to herself how this girl managed to capture Edward's heart when she herself could not even get him to spare her an appreciative glance.

How the man spent over a hundred years without any kind of female companionship, when she and her two sisters were more than willing and available, had once perplexed her. Carlisle and Esme had brought up the possibility that maybe he had just been changed too young, or perhaps the morals he embraced in his human life had intensified through the change much like talents did. Tanya had to agree that he was indeed far too ethical for a vampire, and had been from the moment he woke. Even his so-called rebellious years were more a crisis of conscience, bringing justice to those who would otherwise escape judgment for their crimes. That may all have been a part of it, but Tanya was certain that his gift was the ultimate reason he never sought a lover.

It had to be Bella's resistance to Edward's telepathy that made her a suitable mate for him. Honestly, he should have drained her the first time he smelled her, considering that she was his singer. The allure of her blood might have brought her to his attention, but the fact that he could not hear her thoughts kept him interested in her for more than a forbidden meal. She was certainly not an exceptional beauty. Venom makes some improvements to the human body – molding the vampire into a more attractive lure for their intended human prey. But even as a vampire, Bella was quite plain and unremarkable. Yes, it had to be her silent mind. After all, who wants to hear every little thing their lover is thinking. No one wants that kind of unhindered honesty, especially in the throes of passion. She knew her own mind wasn't always thinking the most flattering thoughts about...

"You must be Tanya." Bella wasn't oblivious to what was going on in Tanya's mind. From the look on her face, it was obvious Tanya didn't think much of her. Of course, the blonde's feelings for Edward were no secret to Bella, and she chalked up the vampire's rude behavior to jealousy. After all, Bella had been the one Edward loved, not Tanya. He'd had more than ample opportunity to take advantage of that situation and he'd always refused.

"Bella." Tanya acknowledged the greeting with a nod, earning her frowns and disapproving looks from the rest of the Denalis and Cullens.

Ever the perfect hostess, Esme changed the subject and got the 'girls' to talk about their recent sailing trip.

Bella quietly excused herself and ran up to her room to freshen up. The shower rinsed away the smells and debris of the forest, but her mind was still filled with thousands of simultaneous thoughts. She was ashamed of her reaction to Jasper, though she knew her new instincts were to blame. Feeding and fucking were the most prominent activities for those of her kind, as Emmett had explained in his own unfiltered attempt to connect with his new sister. However, Jasper was her best friend's mate, and her mate's brother...regardless of her instincts, she needed to find a way to control herself better when she was around him. His gift made it doubly important for her to control her urges, or at least her shield. They had been making progress and the last thing she wanted to do was jeopardize their new found friendship.

* * *

_Hi everyone! Thank you for still reading if you're out there. Sorry for the long hiatus, had a baby, older boys are in school and I've barely had time to think. let alone write. I still plan on finishing, I just don't know how long it will take me because life is so unpredictable now. Anyway, thanks again for reading :)_


	15. Chapter 15

"It's about time!" Bella exclaimed as she intercepted Garrett and Emmett on their way back to the house. Emmett had taken the nomad on an extended hunting trip so that he could experience the finer points of vegetarian vampirism, Emmett style.

Bella had been pacing the yard for hours. With all the visitors in the house, her instincts were screaming at her to run. Jasper was still avoiding her, Carlisle and Eleazar had stayed locked in the study discussing who knows what, and all the remaining females flocked together to discuss topics that held no interest whatsoever for her. She really didn't care how the house was decorated and thinking about the latest fashions on the runways in Paris only reminded her she'd lost her best friend. Bella would have endured that discussion any given day for Alice's sake though.

"Catch anything good?" she asked.

"Garrett here got his first taste of bear. You should have seen it Bella!" Emmett's eyes twinkled like a little boy's. His exuberance always helped lift her spirits – for a moment at least.

"Definitely a step up from deer," Garrett conceded. "However, I can't say it's something I'll stick to. More exciting, sure...but the taste..." He grimaced.

Bella nodded amicably, not able to make the comparison herself. Even if she'd wanted to try their natural diet, the Cullens would never let her. "Did you need to go shower, or could you wait?" she asked.

"I've got to go see my Rosie." Emmett gave her a quick hug and took off for the house. Bella grimaced and realized she really did not want to be within hearing distance of their reunion that would be sure to last for at least the next few hours.

She looked to Garrett beseechingly.

He shrugged, more than amenable to spending time with his new friend. She fascinated him. Bella was the first vampire in a long time to hold his interest. He chalked it up to the type of lifestyle the Cullens lead. Most vampires were not civilized like this family. The Cullens were more interesting to talk to than others. The way they played human gave him back a piece of his humanity as well.

"The rest of Eleazar's family has arrived if you wanted to go meet them," she offered as an out.

"It can wait." He grinned and held out his hand.

She gave him a small smile in return as she slipped her hand into his and they took off together. Bella was absolutely forbidden to go anywhere alone, and having a constant bodyguard made the instinct to run that much more intense. The only person she felt free with was Garrett. Even though she hadn't known him for long, she knew he'd never try to tell her what to do or order her about like the other male vampires in her life.

Garrett was eager to explore the region with Bella...or explore Bella's regions. Either one would do. The woman started getting twitchy after a few hours in the house, just like him.

From the time he'd spent with her, he thought they would make good partners – traveling and exploring together. There was so much he could show her, and there was plenty he could learn from the spitfire. She was strong and intelligent, and pretty easy on the eyes too. He wasn't naïve enough to think there would be any great love shared between them, but they would make good friends. Perhaps he'd found a companion.

Garrett had been through the area before. After he was turned and the war was over, he headed north to explore the continent. He was no longer bound by human constraints and found his new life freeing. Trapping was big in the Hudson Bay area, and what better way to get rich when you could catch your prey with your bare hands and expend barely any effort. He'd never felt compelled to try animal blood during that time, the thought never crossing his mind, especially after having the stench of beaver musk stuck in your nose for weeks. He knew just where to take her, sure that in her young life she'd never seen anything quite like it.

Bella let him lead, enjoying the feel of the wind over her skin, the freedom of just running with nothing to do and nowhere to be. She liked spending time with Garrett. He just let her be. He didn't push her about feelings or plans or anything. He listened when she spoke, and offered his honest opinion when she asked for it. Bella could see herself easily exploring the world with him. Freedom was all she wanted, but the burden of the Volturi situation weighed heavily on her shoulders. She alone seemed to be the one person who could end their reign of terror, and she would do it – for Edward and Alice. For all the innocent vampires they'd manipulated or destroyed. For all the vampires they were currently going after. For her family.

Bella knew she would have to work with Jasper to exact this revenge, and couldn't say she was looking forward to that. Their troubled friendship just couldn't seem to find any smooth sailing, no matter how good their intentions were, one of them always managed to screw it up somehow. She was definitely guilty of her share. Her vampire instincts ran much stronger than she ever imagined they would. The Cullens, especially Edward, had seemed so in control at all times. The only time she'd seen their true nature had been in that ballet studio. She had no idea it would be like this all the time. The urges she had seem to come out of nowhere. It was raw and animalistic, and her rational brain seemed to shut off sometimes as her instincts took over. Like her teenage hormones had kicked into overdrive, or been magnified by the change.

Obviously, she had a lot to learn.

Garrett slowed and closed the distance between them, reaching out for her hand once again,. She eagerly took it. Her sense of touch being so much more intense meant she craved the feel of another in any way she could get it. She'd never admit to spending hours in the night touching every surface and object she could find, exploring her new and improved tactile senses.

"Shhhh..." Garrett held his finger to his lips to emphasize his point.

A few thousand feet later and he pulled her to a stop and stepped up behind her. With one hand on her shoulder, he used his other to point out something too far for human eyes to see. Bella gasped when she realized what she was seeing, and her companion stepped closer, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his head on her shoulder.

"Isn't it amazing?" he asked. His voice barely a breath against her ear.

Bella nodded in wonder.

Far off in the distance a mother polar bear was watching her two cubs play and wrestle in the grass. They were just fuzzy white balls of fur, but make no mistake, their mother was an apex predator and would have no qualms about attempting to rip the two vampires to shreds.

"Churchill is the polar bear capital. They have warnings posted everywhere for the humans, and even offer tours. Me and Emmett passed by here and he almost went after the mother, but then saw the cubs and obviously left them alone. I'm sure they would be considered a unique hunt, but there is no way I could ever take out one of these beautiful animals. So majestic, yet deadly. Like you," Garrett whispered.

Bella could almost feel her old blush prickling at her cheeks and chest. Deadly, sure...but majestic? She scoffed internally. She'd been plain as a human and nothing much had changed when she had. Now she was perfectly plain, but definitely did not possess the majestic beauty most of her kind did.

Garrett didn't have to be a mind reader to tell where her thoughts had turned. "You really don't see yourself clearly do you?"

Bella froze. The familiar words were just too much. Everything was wrong. The wrong voice. The wrong smell. The wrong pair of marble arms wrapped around her waist. She pushed out of the too large arms and dropped to her knees. Just when she thought she might be able to bear it, something always happened to rip that jagged hole wide open again.

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?" Garrett's words eventually penetrated through her haze of pain. His orange eyes were nothing like Edward's, but they were full of worry. His hands weren't as tender and gentle as they cradled her face. The dark stubble that obscured his sculpted jaw spoke of a man, not an immortal boy. Could he make her forget him? Even just for a moment. Could he make the pain less? Distract her?

Her eyes landed on his lips, knowing they wouldn't taste right. They wouldn't feel cold or unyielding. They would yield to hers now. His stubble would scratch her face. His rough hands would tangle in her hair. It would be completely different, and maybe...just for a moment...she wouldn't feel like she was being torn in two.

Bella tore her eyes away from his mouth and caught his gaze again. She saw the hope. Not as desperate as her own, but it was there. But she knew she could never be what he deserved. He deserved that same kind of heart-stopping love she'd had with Edward. It wouldn't be fair to let him think she might be able to be more than a friend, a body in his bed.

She quickly got to her feet and brushed the snow off her jeans. "We should probably head back."

"Bella," he whispered.

She didn't dare look at him. She couldn't stand to see him hurt. It was like Jake all over again.

"Bella," he tried again. "I don't expect..."

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just can't."

Garrett couldn't help but feel a bit of disappointment. Rejection still stung, no matter how many centuries you'd walked the earth. "It's okay," he reassured her.

When she began to run, he fell in step behind her. After a time, she stopped suddenly.

"Garrett," she started hesitantly. "I'd really like to leave with you when this is over. But you have to know...I can never...be more."

"I know," he replied. And he did know. He wasn't expecting anything more than she could give. "Just to have someone by my side to share this journey with me would be enough, Bella. I'd like for you to come with me, too."

She searched his face, his eyes, for the truth, and found it there. Giving her new friend a confirming nod, she took off again without another word. Garrett followed.

"There you are!" Esme exclaimed as Bella came through the back door with Garrett on her heels. At least she didn't look like she'd been playing in the mud this time.

Tanya still sneered in her direction. "Didn't take long for you to move on," she mumbled. Of course everyone could hear her.

"Tanya!" Carmen fixed the succubus with a disapproving stare.

"I just took Bella up to Churchill to show her the polar bears." Garret stepped in front of Bella protectively. "I don't know you, and if this is how you treat others, then I have no desire to know you," he stated coldly.

Garrett then turned to Carmen. "It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Garrett."

"And I am Carmen." She shook his hand. "My husband, Eleazar is upstairs with Carlisle. This would be Tanya." Carmen tipped her head at the scowling bitch. "I apologize for her outburst."

"No need for you to apologize, ma'am. She's the one who said it," he replied, making a point not to acknowledge Tanya.

Carmen gave him an uncomfortable smile, but went on to introduce the other two sisters, Irina and Kate. When Garrett took Kate's hand, they both jumped and looked down to where their hands met. Garrett then looked back up at Kate with a huge grin. "First time that's happened."

"Sorry," Kate replied with a sheepish smile. "I guess my gift got away from me."

"Your gift?" he asked.

"Kate conducts an electric current along her skin. She has learned how to control the strength of it. In the beginning it was only in her palms." Eleazar spoke from the bottom of the stairs, pride evident in his voice. "We thought she might be able to help you develop your gift further, Bella."

Everyone nodded thoughtfully, but Bella saw the look on Garrett's face as he gazed at Kate with wonder.

Kate startled Bella by wrapped her arm around her shoulder. "Oh I think Bella has developed her gift well enough on her own," Kate said, giving Bella a conspiratory wink. "She's only managed to accomplish what no one else has been able to for centuries. With the witch twins out of the way, this will all be a lot easier." Kate squeezed Bella in a one arm hug and gave her a genuinely friendly smile that Bella couldn't help but return.

"Show me," Garrett said.

Kate smirked. "Are you sure? I've been told it's quite painful."

"Oh, I think I'm up to the challenge, lass."

Without a word, Kate reached out and grabbed Garrett's hand. The tall nomad crumpled to the ground immediately and Kate released his hand.

After a minute, Garrett looked up at the blonde vampire. "Is that all you've got?" he asked cheekily, though his voice was a little shaky.

Kate's laugh tinkled like bells. "I think that's enough for now." She reached her hand out once more to help him up, and he took it hesitantly. When there was no shock, he grasped it a little tighter and stood up. Bella didn't miss the way they held hands a little longer than necessary.

Bella guessed she wouldn't be going anywhere with Garrett when this was over.

Sure, she was happy for the nomad, and for Kate. She knew that you just don't walk away from a spark like that. But as it was a vampire's inherent nature to be selfish...she couldn't help the disappointment either. The disappointment of missed opportunities, adventures and freedom. Not being reminded every moment of what had been lost. Distraction. She'd have to find that elsewhere.


End file.
